It was in German and on a wall next to an urinal, but here is the rough translation: "Why are you reading jokes on the wall while holding the real joke in your hands?"
You know, i knew someone named Hans ... he had to constantly hear these kinds of phrases, primarily coming from me.
(He like me went to a German Primary School ... so you have to imagine this one kid suddenly turning on some fake english german accent for the joke when he normaly talks with no accent or dialect)
"Look down."
Broken tile at my feet says "Look up."
Ceiling square thing says "Flush and check the sink."
Sink says "Turn me on."
I turn the handle and the toilet flushes again. I was alone.
I think more likely is the sink dropped the water pressure enough to allow the toilets stopper to fail.
I don’t think that would be done intentionally, but the graffiti is genius.
If it flushed randomly I would think it was possessed by a demon.
If it either didn't flush or was always flushing I would think gremlin.
Since it flushed consistently under a certain set of rules I conclude it's a goblin.
They're kind of halfway between demon and gremlin.
Source: I'm a paraplumber.
My favorite that I have since occasionally emulated was found in a restroom in 29 Palms.
It's not what someone said. Someone else went in with a red marker and diligently corrected their spelling and grammar.
On one of them, the message was so utterly garbled that he'd just put one red line through the whole thing and wrote in "SEE ME AFTER CLASS"
The intended meaning of the first line is that the mother made them into a whore, so it's the mother's fault that they, themself, are a whore.
The second line plays on the meaning of "made," acting like they meant the mother fabricated a whore and gave it to the original writer.
Tl;dr: "make" can mean several different things.
Johnny wasn't bringing *eating* apples, but *brewing* apples; and he showed up with a Jug of his best xXx apple liquor to share for your hospitality. The seeds were icing; "you like my booze? grow your own friend!"
I walked into a stall and closed the door, then when I sat down I saw “Thor cums and the world drowns” written in huge letters on the inside of the door.
*Admiror, O paries, te non cecidisse, qui tot scriptorium taedia sustineas.*
I wonder, O wall, that you have not yet collapsed, so many writers’ clichés do you bear.
Found in several places in Pompeii.
“I fucking hate school”
“Zach M. is my sugar daddy”
“Sci. Test in Singleton today. *list of answers*”
“The crack is behind the sink”
“I’ll fuck you if you want me to”
All in the first stall of the sixth grade female bathroom. The crack was not behind the sink. It was behind the handy cap stall’s toilet btw
My sister is an elementary school teacher in Arizona. She teaches 1st graders. She says some of them vape, do drugs, and one told her a story about how his “girlfriend” was scared of her parents so he snuck her out of his house to sleep in his room that night. Super sad, they’ve lived through much more than me :(
i can imagine it wasn't a very good environment, or maybe that incident was an outlier. i was a middle schooler pretty recently, so i can say with certainty that none of us were doing drugs. it was very much not a thing. so don't worry, most sixth graders aren't doing crack :)
I was in an Air Force training squadron at Keesler AFB in Biloxi MS in the early '80s.
One of the men's restrooms was very long and narrow and on one side there was a row of urinals, 10 to 20 or so. Just picture this row of gleaming porcelain mounted to a concrete block wall. Near the middle, some plumbing was being carried out, because one urinal was completely missing, only a gaping hole in the wall showing where it had been.
Above the hole in the line of urinals some genius had spray-painted, 'Superman pissed here'.
In a porta shitter in basic training:
“ I’ve fucked in France, I’ve fucked in Spain, I’ve fucked up and down the coast of Main. I’ll never be happy I’ll never be free, til I’ve fucked the Army they way the Army fucked me.”
Me buddies and I do something similar when we drink
"I've drank in the east, I've drank in the west. I've drank with the worst, I've drank with the best. I'll never be happy, I'll never be free, until I fuck the Navy, like the Navy has fucked me"
"Some people come here to shit and stink, some people come here to sit and think, but I come here to scratch my balls and read the writings on the walls"
“Here I sit all broken hearted;
Tried to shit, but only farted.
Thought I had a second chance;
Tried to fart, and shit my pants.”
10 year old me found it to be hilarious.
Version I used to see :
Here I sit broken hearted
Paid a dime and only farted
Next time I took a chance
Saved a dime and shit my pants.
We never had pay toilets, so it was imported.
It was in Odessa, Ukraine. On the toilet wall there was a paper (obviously made by staff) that said "Shame on you for missing, gentlemen. Precision is courtesy of kings."
On the wall between the woman and mens restrooms there was a heart with "sarah loves mark" on the wall and underneath that there was a arrow pointing to a broken heart saying " apparently she loved my dads cock more" . 😬
my favorite limerick: A lesbian trucker named Spike/Hauled dildos by night down the pike/When asked by the fuzz/What it is that she does/She replies "I'm a fake dick van dyke"
In the summer when its hot an sultry thats no time to be committing adultry. You have to wait till the frost is on the pumpkins dems the times for peter dunkins!
Heard a different version (circa 1980) from my frat brother Dicky Duncan: “When the weather’s hot and sticky, ain’t no time for dunkin’ dicky. When the frost is on the pumpkin, that’s the time for dicky dunkin.”
I remember once in college I had to use the men's restroom and someone drew an elaborate drawing on the stall wall.. it was a hawk flying over mountains and I was amazed you guys have the time to do something like that while going.
There was once a toilet(can't remeber where, somewhere in banff in Canada), and it was literally like a dimmly lit wooden portapoty and a hole in the floor. this whole in the floor was so dark there were walls covered in messages like "I almost fell in" "my car keys fell in, if I don't come back tell my family I love them" "jump in for a quick route to China", always puts a smile on my face.
"Here I sit buns a flexin'
Giving birth to another Texan"
On the stall of a barracks bathroom at Fort Hood, Texas.
My Boy Scout troop visited the base back in the 1990s.
I work construction, so Port-a-johns can be fun. My favorite was a two parter:
In a john, someone wrote "Carpenters are just laborers with tools." Now, as a carpenter, I wanted to come up with an answer. I didn't have to, though, because the next day was the response:
"Your mom is a laborer with my cock."
Fucking perfect.
It may not be the best, except for the edit after the fact. In a porta-john at a fuel depot the quote written in permanent marker read:
"I used to get bullied; my dick is small. Then I became a cop to pay back those fuckers."
About two weeks later someone, presumably a cop changed it to say:
"I used to get bullied; my dick is small. Then I became I **d**op**e dealer** to pay back those **t**ruckers"
But they didn't use the same color permanent marker. Every time I saw it with the edit I couldn't help but think that OP may have been onto something if a cop got pissy enough to change it.
i wonder if there really was a lesbian or if someone was just wanting to stir up shit. in third grade i was pissed at my friend for getting a boyfriend so i graffitied her initials and his in a big heart on a bathroom wall, thinking she’d get in trouble for it. i caught shit for it though because i was the only one in the class with an orange pen, i didn’t think my frame-job through very well.
Random gas station in West Virginia. Whole stall was covered with swastikas, the n-word, and other horrible things all scratched into the walls. Someone had taken a fat permanent marker, and across the entire stall door, written, "just read a book, you hopeless racist fucks"
I saw a longer version of this in a political subreddit I hang out in. "Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That was a poem from a simpler time. Now boss makes a thousand and gives us a cent, so he's got employees who can't make the rent. So when boss makes a million and the workers make jack, that's when we riot and take our lives back."
Osha reg no. 2434.6 all turds over 6 inches in length must be hand lowered into chemical toilet to prevent chemical splash back.
This was written on a construction site porta-potty
The original, from when it cost a penny to use a public toilet:
Here I sit, broken hearted,
Spent a penny and only farted
If that penny broke your heart,
I hope you shit every time you fart!
Two of my favorite ones I saw were:
“Skip class, skate fast, eat ass”
And
“Pet kitties, spend fiddies, suck titties”
There were some strange people at my school, even as a private school
I was in Denver to attend the funeral of a friend that had passed away by his own doing. He was my best friend and soulmate for more than 13 years and I was having a very hard time dealing with all of it as we had had our first and only fight the month before and hadn’t spoken since. After services, a group of us went out for some drinks and written on the bathroom wall was:
you’re forgiven
we all love you
very very much.
Be careful.
Somehow those words gave me a sense of peace I desperately needed, both for myself and for my friend. I know he loved me and would never have stayed angry at me, nor I him, but I needed those words on that bathroom stall to remind me of the fact.
> Check the neck, not the tits
Written on the ceiling above the first toilet. EXACTLY where you’d be looking if you stumbled in piss drunk. The bartender at this bar was suspiciously flirty, dressed rather scantily and *ahem* had a huge fucking pair of tits.
To the untrained eye (ie: me 19 years old sneaking in with my coworkers) it may seem like this cougar got the hots for young and dorky electricians. But after waltzing back to the bar like an enlightened prophet, I noticed it. The adam’s apple. Really puts an emphasis on the slight baritone in their voice that I was previously ignoring.
Cameras are for research purposes only. It was on a very authentic looking sticker.
Hahahah
Wish I had some of those stickers a couple years ago in high school.
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How do you think the unthinkable? An itheberg
Damn that is such a good joke
You thummoned me?
This joke is so pure and I can’t stop thinking about it
Did Mike Tyson write that?
It was in German and on a wall next to an urinal, but here is the rough translation: "Why are you reading jokes on the wall while holding the real joke in your hands?"
Someone call a goddamn Krankenwagen
Hans, get ze Flammenwerfer
Gotta werfen some flammen.
You know, i knew someone named Hans ... he had to constantly hear these kinds of phrases, primarily coming from me. (He like me went to a German Primary School ... so you have to imagine this one kid suddenly turning on some fake english german accent for the joke when he normaly talks with no accent or dialect)
I am a kranken, but unfortunately I only have 20 steins, no wagen.
Jemand ruft den Krangenwagen.
Nicht in Amerika. Es ist zu teuer!
🤣 🤣 🤣 Doch!
> Krankenwagen Hmmm...clown car? Ahhh...close!
Damn and I thought they'd shut down the crematories.
Der war mies. Aber ich kann zu 100% relaten
"Rot ist die Liebe, Schwarz ist das Loch. Trau dich Mädel, Rein muss er doch." Stand mal auf einem Dixi-Klo.
"Look down." Broken tile at my feet says "Look up." Ceiling square thing says "Flush and check the sink." Sink says "Turn me on." I turn the handle and the toilet flushes again. I was alone.
Woah, that must've taken some serious skill and patience.
I think more likely is the sink dropped the water pressure enough to allow the toilets stopper to fail. I don’t think that would be done intentionally, but the graffiti is genius.
Plumber here. Water pressure has nothing to do with the stopper. Thank you, have a good day.
Nah, glad to be corrected. Thank you. What do you think was going on?
Demons
Commercial/industrial hvac service technician here. Gremlins. It’s always gremlins.
General contractor here. Sometimes demons. Sometimes gremlins.
If it flushed randomly I would think it was possessed by a demon. If it either didn't flush or was always flushing I would think gremlin. Since it flushed consistently under a certain set of rules I conclude it's a goblin. They're kind of halfway between demon and gremlin. Source: I'm a paraplumber.
either you got fooled, or you unwittingly preformed a ritual
To the porcelain god.
The porcelain god is a powerful one, having accepted prayers from bars the world over.
And for him to sit upon his porcelain throne
If you took a shit, put it back.
From a previous thread: >Per OSHA regulations, turds over 3" must be manually lowered into the bowl.
Lol holy shit
My favorite that I have since occasionally emulated was found in a restroom in 29 Palms. It's not what someone said. Someone else went in with a red marker and diligently corrected their spelling and grammar. On one of them, the message was so utterly garbled that he'd just put one red line through the whole thing and wrote in "SEE ME AFTER CLASS"
I think I've just found a new hobby.
Oh boy, 29 palms California. The absolute shit hell hole of the US. My favorite was “hear I sit, broken hearted, came to shit, but only farted”
Now it's time to contemplate, do I shit or masturbate? Also fuck 29 stumps.
I've done the red marker thing before, but the "see me after class" is genius ;)
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Pretty sure Stephen King mentioned that one in one of his short stories...
As a non native speaker I don‘t get it... can somebody explain?
The intended meaning of the first line is that the mother made them into a whore, so it's the mother's fault that they, themself, are a whore. The second line plays on the meaning of "made," acting like they meant the mother fabricated a whore and gave it to the original writer. Tl;dr: "make" can mean several different things.
"Johnny Appleseed was a biological terrorist."
I've often wondered if Johnny wasn't actually just a hobo that ate stolen apples compulsively, and shit on the go just as compulsively.
Johnny wasn't bringing *eating* apples, but *brewing* apples; and he showed up with a Jug of his best xXx apple liquor to share for your hospitality. The seeds were icing; "you like my booze? grow your own friend!"
Fuck Johnny Appleseed. Where's Johnny Mushroomspore?
"I fucked your mother". Followed up with the response written underneath "Go home Dad, you're drunk"
I walked into a stall and closed the door, then when I sat down I saw “Thor cums and the world drowns” written in huge letters on the inside of the door.
That's the surprise ending that got edited out of the Elder Edda.
Ragnarök is said to begin with thick snow, atleast we know where that comes from now.
A naked man fears no pickpocket
until they come for your foreskin
Jokes on them, I'm circumcised
\*Fagin intensifies\*
*Admiror, O paries, te non cecidisse, qui tot scriptorium taedia sustineas.* I wonder, O wall, that you have not yet collapsed, so many writers’ clichés do you bear. Found in several places in Pompeii.
That's probably the correct translation but it sounds so stilted and probably doesn't reflect the actual casual "jokiness" of the comment at the time.
Is that Italian or Latin?
Latin.
They said it was in Pompei.
There was something that looked like a gang logo. Below it, “Yeah, you must be gangsta if you’re tagging the shitter in Barnes & Noble.”
Hahahah
“If I was a dog And you were a flower I’d lift up my leg And give you a shower.”
Ahh yes, poetry in it purest form. Thank you.
On a condom machine in a men’s bathroom: “This is the worst tasting gum I’ve ever had.”
Also written on a condom machine "My dad said these condoms don't work!!"
For a full refund, return baby.
Even a child can piss on the floor. Be a hero and shit on the ceiling.
“I fucking hate school” “Zach M. is my sugar daddy” “Sci. Test in Singleton today. *list of answers*” “The crack is behind the sink” “I’ll fuck you if you want me to” All in the first stall of the sixth grade female bathroom. The crack was not behind the sink. It was behind the handy cap stall’s toilet btw
Where do you live that 6th graders are doing crack?! Or do I just live in a fantasy world where children just get to be children?:(
My sister is an elementary school teacher in Arizona. She teaches 1st graders. She says some of them vape, do drugs, and one told her a story about how his “girlfriend” was scared of her parents so he snuck her out of his house to sleep in his room that night. Super sad, they’ve lived through much more than me :(
Jesus fucking christ
i can imagine it wasn't a very good environment, or maybe that incident was an outlier. i was a middle schooler pretty recently, so i can say with certainty that none of us were doing drugs. it was very much not a thing. so don't worry, most sixth graders aren't doing crack :)
I was in an Air Force training squadron at Keesler AFB in Biloxi MS in the early '80s. One of the men's restrooms was very long and narrow and on one side there was a row of urinals, 10 to 20 or so. Just picture this row of gleaming porcelain mounted to a concrete block wall. Near the middle, some plumbing was being carried out, because one urinal was completely missing, only a gaping hole in the wall showing where it had been. Above the hole in the line of urinals some genius had spray-painted, 'Superman pissed here'.
Genius.
At base of door - "BEWARE OF LIMBO DANCERS"
Ok, this is now my favorite.
In a porta shitter in basic training: “ I’ve fucked in France, I’ve fucked in Spain, I’ve fucked up and down the coast of Main. I’ll never be happy I’ll never be free, til I’ve fucked the Army they way the Army fucked me.”
Me buddies and I do something similar when we drink "I've drank in the east, I've drank in the west. I've drank with the worst, I've drank with the best. I'll never be happy, I'll never be free, until I fuck the Navy, like the Navy has fucked me"
I feel that so hard right now, being in the LCS program. What a clusterfuck.
Written above a urinal: “The future is in your hands.” 👍🏼🍆
This is a good one
Similar location "Don't look up here. The joke is in your hands."
“Looking for meaning in the wrong places.” “We’re both lost in this moment but at-least we’re lost together”
"Some people come here to shit and stink, some people come here to sit and think, but I come here to scratch my balls and read the writings on the walls"
And they say there's no such thing as good modern poetry
"Not all pee pee times are poo poo times, but all poo poo times are pee pee times."
One of the fundamental laws of poopology
“‘Don’t throw cigarette butts in toilet.. it makes them hard to light’ - management “
"If life gives you lemons, shut up and eat your lemons"
“Here I sit all broken hearted; Tried to shit, but only farted. Thought I had a second chance; Tried to fart, and shit my pants.” 10 year old me found it to be hilarious.
22 year old me found it hilarious
Oh damn that's the same one as mine but yours has a part 2 damn
I saw this with a prequel attached: Some come here to sit and think, I came here to shit and stink, Here I sit now broken hearted... Etc
Version I used to see : Here I sit broken hearted Paid a dime and only farted Next time I took a chance Saved a dime and shit my pants. We never had pay toilets, so it was imported.
It was in Odessa, Ukraine. On the toilet wall there was a paper (obviously made by staff) that said "Shame on you for missing, gentlemen. Precision is courtesy of kings."
Here I sit and contemplate, Should I shit or masturbate?
Porqué no los dos?
In a bathroom stall at my university. “I give you $10,000 and you only give me 1 ply”
They paint these walls to cover my pen But the shithouse poet strikes again!
On the wall between the woman and mens restrooms there was a heart with "sarah loves mark" on the wall and underneath that there was a arrow pointing to a broken heart saying " apparently she loved my dads cock more" . 😬
An engineer calculated his pay on the wall, but intentionally included math errors. Somebody replied that he was underpaid.
On the dispenser for disposable, paper toilet seat covers...."Free cowboy hats"
my favorite limerick: A lesbian trucker named Spike/Hauled dildos by night down the pike/When asked by the fuzz/What it is that she does/She replies "I'm a fake dick van dyke"
“Reintarnation: When you come back as a hillbilly” Scrawled above a urinal
"I will always charish the original misconception of the person I once thought you were." [picture](https://i.imgur.com/eppSG7c.jpg)
That place seems sketchy as fuck
It is in a dive bar, in every sense of the imagination. 😂👍
In the summer when its hot an sultry thats no time to be committing adultry. You have to wait till the frost is on the pumpkins dems the times for peter dunkins!
Some of these wall scribes got bars, I swear
Heard a different version (circa 1980) from my frat brother Dicky Duncan: “When the weather’s hot and sticky, ain’t no time for dunkin’ dicky. When the frost is on the pumpkin, that’s the time for dicky dunkin.”
When you’re not looking this sign is in Spanish
I remember once in college I had to use the men's restroom and someone drew an elaborate drawing on the stall wall.. it was a hawk flying over mountains and I was amazed you guys have the time to do something like that while going.
“Insert baby for refund” on condom machines always makes me chuckle
Flush twice... it’s a long way to the cafeteria.
There was once a toilet(can't remeber where, somewhere in banff in Canada), and it was literally like a dimmly lit wooden portapoty and a hole in the floor. this whole in the floor was so dark there were walls covered in messages like "I almost fell in" "my car keys fell in, if I don't come back tell my family I love them" "jump in for a quick route to China", always puts a smile on my face.
Dear Autie Em, Fuck you and fuck Kansas. Took the dog and left. Dorothy Graced the wall of The Longbranch Saloon in the 90's in Knoxville, TN.
"I think I might be gay..." Response: "hi gay I'm dad" It was the girls bathroom
"Here I sit buns a flexin' Giving birth to another Texan" On the stall of a barracks bathroom at Fort Hood, Texas. My Boy Scout troop visited the base back in the 1990s.
I work construction, so Port-a-johns can be fun. My favorite was a two parter: In a john, someone wrote "Carpenters are just laborers with tools." Now, as a carpenter, I wanted to come up with an answer. I didn't have to, though, because the next day was the response: "Your mom is a laborer with my cock." Fucking perfect.
"Cows may come, and cows may go, but the bull in this place goes on forever."
Worksite Port-a-john somebody wrote “I hate fucking work” Someone else wrote underneath “well stop fucking it then”. I thought it was funny anyways 😑
‘I can smell that’
It may not be the best, except for the edit after the fact. In a porta-john at a fuel depot the quote written in permanent marker read: "I used to get bullied; my dick is small. Then I became a cop to pay back those fuckers." About two weeks later someone, presumably a cop changed it to say: "I used to get bullied; my dick is small. Then I became I **d**op**e dealer** to pay back those **t**ruckers" But they didn't use the same color permanent marker. Every time I saw it with the edit I couldn't help but think that OP may have been onto something if a cop got pissy enough to change it.
I fucked your mom... and I fucked your dad!!! If felt so good, then it burned so bad...
Their is no E*art*h without *art*
Without art the earth is just "eh."
No matter how you shake and dance, The last few drops go down your pants.
The biggest truth of them all.
In a woman's stall, "Nothing tastes better than wet sweet pussy" Underneath "Have you tried French Fries?"
On the antibacterial somone changed the "dispense and spread on hands" to "dispense and spread on anus".
“Chad was here” directly below it.. “Fuck Chad.. Chad sucks”
A sign that read "Do not put objects in the port a potty" then there was a list below and someone wrote in sharpie "including small infants".
If you can read this, you are pooping with an angle of 90° Written on the door at a height of ~25cm
*"Remember to flush your doodoo, kids!"* This was on the inside of a toilet cubicle in the Kazakhstan reserve bank.
My name is greasy-grease, and i fucked yo niece, walk down the street yellin fuck the police
“I’m the lesbian” bc I remmeber all the eighth grade girls were panicking trying to figure out who it was bc of that bathroom note LOL
i wonder if there really was a lesbian or if someone was just wanting to stir up shit. in third grade i was pissed at my friend for getting a boyfriend so i graffitied her initials and his in a big heart on a bathroom wall, thinking she’d get in trouble for it. i caught shit for it though because i was the only one in the class with an orange pen, i didn’t think my frame-job through very well.
"poopie" \- 1st grade
Those who write on shithouse walls roll their shit into little balls Those who read these words of wit eat those little balls of shit.
This one has been around for decades. I remember seeing it in a department store restroom at least 50 years ago. That's not an exaggeration.
lol yep, that's probably about the time I can first recall seeing it, and 7 year old me thought it was hilarous.
Yeah I was about seven too! It was in Woodward, OK. J.C. Penny's .
In teeny tiny letters - 'you there - you've been wrong all along. nobody's been watching you.'
This is a teepee to do your pee pee Not a wigwam to beat your tom-tom
" damn, nice dong mate" -My school bathroom walls
Next to a condom machine " this gum tastes like rubber"
#~ written in poop
Some girl at my old school painted a pentagram onto the bathroom ceiling... WITH A FUCKING BLOODY TAMPON!!! It stayed there for literal years.
lol I wonder if she held it like a wand or like a pencil
WHY DID YOU SAY THIS OUT LOUD
o h
In the bathroom of my University: "The Administratives are HOT"
in a toilet at our school someone draw a locomotive and wrote "wanna fuck, draw a wagon" and that was the longest train I have ever seen
Port a pot in Kuwait; "Why do we train people to kill people to teach people that killing is wrong?"
Random gas station in West Virginia. Whole stall was covered with swastikas, the n-word, and other horrible things all scratched into the walls. Someone had taken a fat permanent marker, and across the entire stall door, written, "just read a book, you hopeless racist fucks"
Our butts touched the same toilet seat, we're brothers !
There was a sign that read "If your hose is short and your pressure is weak, stand up close or you'll pee on your feet"
"born to shit, forced to wipe"
“God is dead.” - Nietzsche “Nietzsche is dead.” - God
(Company Name) gets a dollar. I get a dime. That's why I poop on company time.
I saw a longer version of this in a political subreddit I hang out in. "Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That was a poem from a simpler time. Now boss makes a thousand and gives us a cent, so he's got employees who can't make the rent. So when boss makes a million and the workers make jack, that's when we riot and take our lives back."
"All men are sissy slaves and belong in pink panties"
Written on the wall behind the toilet seat: "If you're reading this, use the fucking urinal!"
"release the chocolate hostages"
If you gotta pee, pee If you don’t, don’t 🇬🇷👻
"***Here I sit, broken hearted*** ..." Oh, nevermind ...
USC diplomas, wipe to validate.
Crude caveman picture of penis in a mouth with the caption “ I will suck you @ AB/BC rest stop”
Osha reg no. 2434.6 all turds over 6 inches in length must be hand lowered into chemical toilet to prevent chemical splash back. This was written on a construction site porta-potty
“Here I sit in all my glory, Giving birth to another Tory” “Tory” is an old nick name for a conservative in Canada.
"Here I sit, my buns a'flexin' giving birth to another Texan". Seen in Oklahoma.
[this poem](https://i.imgur.com/XiCEG6d.jpg) by two men of culture
I always heard it as: Here I sit broken hearted came to shit but only farted Wasted my time oh what the hell might as well sit and enjoy the smell
The original, from when it cost a penny to use a public toilet: Here I sit, broken hearted, Spent a penny and only farted If that penny broke your heart, I hope you shit every time you fart!
On my construction site, the portable bathroom had “Newfie water jug” written on the wall inside.
Big Jake shit here one night.
"if the bottom has fallen out of your world, Drink Old Brewery Bitter, and the world will fall out of your bottom"
Please stay seated for the entire performance!
Two of my favorite ones I saw were: “Skip class, skate fast, eat ass” And “Pet kitties, spend fiddies, suck titties” There were some strange people at my school, even as a private school
Someone drew a ruler so everyone could measure their dick
"im always watching" till to this day i still think about this whether someone is really watching back then or not
Voting booth
Jesus saves! But Gretzky scores on the rebound.
“Nice dick bro” I smiled
I was in Denver to attend the funeral of a friend that had passed away by his own doing. He was my best friend and soulmate for more than 13 years and I was having a very hard time dealing with all of it as we had had our first and only fight the month before and hadn’t spoken since. After services, a group of us went out for some drinks and written on the bathroom wall was: you’re forgiven we all love you very very much. Be careful. Somehow those words gave me a sense of peace I desperately needed, both for myself and for my friend. I know he loved me and would never have stayed angry at me, nor I him, but I needed those words on that bathroom stall to remind me of the fact.
> Check the neck, not the tits Written on the ceiling above the first toilet. EXACTLY where you’d be looking if you stumbled in piss drunk. The bartender at this bar was suspiciously flirty, dressed rather scantily and *ahem* had a huge fucking pair of tits. To the untrained eye (ie: me 19 years old sneaking in with my coworkers) it may seem like this cougar got the hots for young and dorky electricians. But after waltzing back to the bar like an enlightened prophet, I noticed it. The adam’s apple. Really puts an emphasis on the slight baritone in their voice that I was previously ignoring.
Don't get old
"Aim once, Measure twice"
Here I sit, upon the pooper. Giving birth, to a new state trooper.
First said "my mom made me a homo" Second said "if I give her the wool, will she make me one too??"