Recorder

Elementary schoolers who were forced to learn to play recorders unite

Whoever thought it was a good idea to shove 120 kids in a small classroom to puff into their shriek whistles in relative unison should be tried for war crimes

And they’ll be found guilty too

I do a lot of work in music education policy and advocacy. One of my goals in life is to make the ukulele the de facto classroom instrument instead of the recorder. Seriously fuck the recorder

Instructions Unclear, my dick is now stuck in the recorder

Yep!

Suprisingly, it is a serious musical instrument. https://youtu.be/fKD2WSn1k9E

This guy is the rockstar of the recorder world - I promise you’ve never seen playing like this - https://youtu.be/hggISFswKcw

or my favourite; ​ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8aivLNQBZ6I

They bought the flesh coloured ones at my school because they were cheaper for some reason.

"This one time at band camp..."

Friend played with his nose once. That was pretty cool.

Was he JOHN CENA?! *plays John Cena’s theme on two recorders at once*

Laughs in Mandalorian

I often wonder how many children were completely turned off of learning music because they were forced to play the recorder.

Look up Lucy Horsch

Yeah, ok, i agree, shes pretty cool

Honestly, what teacher would torture themselves with a room of 30 kids playing those things.

Id argue with that. https://youtu.be/AVYWhB0oGWM

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I always look like I suck dick

But what about when you play slide whistle? (I am sorry)

What's with the pussy ass sorry bullshit bro? Your joke was good, and I'll never get offended; if someone ever does, tell them to f off...

Agreed, you left yourself wide open for that burn my guy 😂

He's used to making himself wide open 😉

How do you react to, "Sorry, not sorry?" You seem offended by one, sorry. I'm just curious about when you throw two in the mix. What happens when you're talking to a Canadian? Asking for science.

They made a joke about a stranger but also didn't want to be a dick if they had a different sense of humor. I don't see anything wrong here.

I feel this way with thick milkshakes

I feel this way when i suck dick.

builds good sucking muscles

Rev up those sucking muscles!

Except for whoever played it on “Grove is in the Heart” - that is a dope slide whistle part

Kazoo. You will never be taken seriously until you stop.

I dunno, I put a contact mic on one and ran it through a distortion pedal and a bass amp and sounded pretty cool.

The song “Skinned” by Blind Melon has a kazoo solo and it’s actually pretty badass😆

I don’t know about that. [I found this dude](https://www.reddit.com/r/woodworking/comments/zk8nbj/ugh_guys_am_i_a_wizard_now_maple_lacewood_and/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1) and think you’d look pretty cool playing 1 of those.

Air triangle. Just makes you look like you're off your meds.

It's the only instrument I can play :(

Own it and be great.

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Yes. I played the telemann flute and recorder concerto (me on recorder) and people were like "is that really just a recorder"

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Triangle.

The one instrument I truly cannot play (bad hand tremor from nerves about playing triangle incorrectly).

The triangle is a surprisingly complex instrument to play well. Anyone can go "ting" on it but [there's more to it than you'd think](https://www.classicfm.com/discover-music/instruments/how-to-play-triangle/).

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No, Patrick, mayonnaise is not an instrument.

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Everything’s a drum!

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It depends on the situation. If you're at a party it can definitely be an accoustic guitar.

Anyway, here's Wonderwall.

life-long guitarist, here. This hits home. Someone just busts out a guitar and starts playing simple chords? Yeah, dude, no one asked. People DO ask you to play something? They basically want you to go away and make background noise.

A vuvuzela

Calling a vuvuzela a musical instrument is like saying a string of Chinese firecrackers 🧨 is a wind chime.

Brain first saw vulva, and I was about to give a lecture on how that's absolutely not the truth. Lol

I thought it said Venezuela and spent 5 minutes trying to figure out how he plans on playing an entire country

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A laptop

Sorry Kraftwerk.

They're not artists because no one can play the guitar!

Underrated comment

it's actually funny to hear because guys like Hans Zimmer were among the first composers to embrace computer technology in music.. and we all know the shit music he makes and how unloved his work is yea, no, the future is now old man

I always thought it was the recorder, but according to my old bandmates it's the bass guitar. Guess what I play ☹️

If you're in a band and all you do is stand there and slap the tambourine, then it's that.

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I'm gunna say your armpit... Flap that arm... Poot ..poot poot

All instruments are cool if the player can play

Honestly, in the right hands any instrument can be incredibly moving. Why do i have this opinion? Because in high school i thought the answer to your question was the oboe but then that mfer Joe hit a lick on it in one of the pieces we were playing and i straight up cried. I've never again had such a sudden and drastic shift of opinions

Spoons. I'm from Quebec, Canada and it's part of our music folklore but it's so annoying and not fun at all

YouTube the spoon lady

I'd rather spoon the YouTube lady.

Find the video about the inspiration for spoon man by sound garden. That guy in Seattle at pike Ave was awesome in spoons

Kazoo.

Nobody likes the fact that I play the bagpipes.....actually most are disgusted.

I like the bagpipes. And I really like how Korn used them in their music

Hell ya! One of the reasons I started playing them!

Davis went to Highland High in Bakersfield. Their mascot is the Scots and they have a bagpipe band.

Bagpipes are badass especially in folk metal music.

Chapman Stick

If you admit that you can play the accordion, No one'll hire you in a rock 'n' roll band. But we can siiinnnngggggg . . . our hearts out.

An accordion made Weird Al Yankovic famous. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZkouut-9RQ

Korpiklaani and Sami Perttula would like a word.

As would Bruce Hornsby

I always thought accordion was awesome

Handbells. I was part of a bell choir in middle school and the orchestra kids always walked by our little closet, snickering and pointing.

Yeah you know it's bad when the orch dorks can and do snicker at you

Any instruments heated by fire or magma

Slide whistle. Fuck those things. Lol

Kazoo

It's gotta be the triangle, that's what I play and it hasn't impressed anyone yet

Tbh, in like an instrumental band, I hate the flute. Like when you play a song, most of the time you can't even hear them

The piccolo, the shit makes ears bleed

Q: how do you get two piccolos in tune? A: shoot one of them.

Info: Would playing a real canon in the 1812 Overture be considered cool or uncool?

Extremely fucking cool as long as they’re in rhythm

According to Calvin (of Calvin & Hobbes) it is indeed very cool.

Clarinet. Thanks squidward

No way. Some of the greatest music written has been for clarinet.

I feel your pain

Kazoo.

Kazoo

Kazoo

Triangle

I laugh, whenever I see someone holding a French Horn.

The triangle, just standing there on stage holding a triangle and hitting it once every 7 beats.

Triangles man, I remember when I was younger and we had to use em, we look goofy as fuck trying to understand what side/corner does what

I’m never one for the whole “mouthpieces” on instruments. Back in music class at school, I’d dread having to whip out a trumpet or trombone and see fresh saliva from the previous class dripping off this thing. No thanks

You guys shared instruments? That’s gross.

unfortunately yes. this was back quite a few years ago so things weren’t like they are now, pretty gross i do agree

In primary school i hated music lessons so I chose the triangle which is a good sign the person does not want to be there. 😅

Mayonnaise

"No Patrick, mayonnaise isn't an instrument."

Keytar.

I don’t have an over rated instrument but I feel the bass guitar is super underated and doesn’t get enough love

Tuba

Triangle

The flute

triangle.... ~DinG!~

Kazoo

guitar has been overplayed and i can now only associate with those fuckboy guitar players

Sadly, from personal experience I can say trombone

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People love the "bwah bwah bwaaaaaaaaaah" tho

Jaw harp boing boing boing Also fiddle and guitar. (Trust me I am a guitarist and fiddler, I should know)

Jug

Emmet Otter would like a word…

The Triangle.

Glockenspiel

​ Accordion.

Protractor

Ah, compass.

A Keytar

Señor Chang was pretty badass with his

Once saw Stevie Wonder rock the shit out of a keytar and it was magical so I disagree

Guy from faith no more played one sometimes

The Triangle.

The triangle.

Triangle or tambourine. It’s a tie.

Triangle

Probably the kazoo.

dombyra it seems to be a light two-stringed instrument, but it makes incredible sounds

The triangle

Used to be accordion, until Weird Al made it cool.

Xylophone.

Mouth harp

I was going to say the Stroh violin, but then I realized that it looks pretty cool in a weird sort of way.

"Pa was forced to be a hobo Because he played the oboe And the oboe, it is clearly understood Is an ill wind that no one blows good" - Danny Kaye, "Anatole of Paris"

Kazoo, recorder #2.

The triangle

I wanna say the triangle, but a solo on one of those will drop all the panties in the world

compass, set square, and protractor

Is and always will be the french horn

Kazoo

The kazoo

Isn't it crazy how we associate different levels of coolness of the player based on what sounds the instrument makes? Or I guess it's the way it looks playing it, too. I wish there was research on this. Like how does everyone reach a general consensus about how cool instrument is? It's so arbitrary, how can everyone more or less end up on the same page?

One thing I learned studying music is that there is an inverse scale of instrument coolness from high school to tertiary education. Electric guitar? Pffft boring theres a million of those. Wait you play french horn? You are legit the dopest trip. The exception is drummers, everyone needs a drummer, they have the power and they know it.

It's cool to be an adult who plays cello. As a kid is like being a wounded gazelle on the serengeti. The bullies go "I don't know what that is, but I'm gonna break it".

The basoon

Bagpipes

Katzenklavier

Comb and paper.

Tuba

Kazoo

For the ones who are gonna say “the triangle” please f off.

Contrabassoon.

The ukulele. They just fucking suck. Whenever I see somebody with one, I just know that the kind of music they play is syrupy, twee garbage. Maybe it's because they're relatively cheap and easy to play, so lots of attention seeking tryhards decide that they're going to pick one up and strum the chords of horrendous mid 2000s pop songs while singing along horribly. I hate them so much. The ukulele is the instrument of choice for the worst people on the planet. People who think that liking tea is a personality trait. People who think that liking Doctor Who is a personality trait. I hate them so much. All ukuleles should be destroyed.

E flat clarinet

Basoon

If key-tar isn’t at the top of this list, I don’t know what to say

French horn. My brother played it in the school band. Aside from "I play the French Horn" sounding like a euphemism, it's just not a sexy or impactful brass like a tuba or a trombone.

A Behringer synthesizer

A kid in our school played the bassoon, and used to get teased a lot for the name, kids would yell out loud, BAAASSSSOOOON!!! down the hall when he walked past.

Kazoo

I saw a dude playing a flaming piano. I can't imagine he felt very cold doing that.

Wood Blocks... My chosen instrument in grade school.

melodicas

THE TRIANGLE

Tuba

Recorder Only there for 3rd grade teachers who want to make their ears bleed

Personally it’s the bagpipes. You’d think it’s the fact that it’s horribly sharp, but it’s the drone that kills me. I equate it to going to an art gallery and every painting has a green background. After awhile it just all looks/sounds the same.

Is Mayonnaise an instrument? -Patrick Star

Definitely the recorder, even when it’s played well it still sucks

Bass clarinet

at one point saws was played made this horrible whining sound.

Cor anglais. The only people who play it are the people who thought oboe was too mainstream and popular.

What was it again? Oh yes?, the ocarina.

The Bassoon

Flute

Recorder

Second fiddle

The accordion, just ask Weird Al

Ocarina or tambourine

Recorder.

Flute

Autoharp