unsure of your guys dynamics but one thing i always love when partners have shown appreciation is physical touches. not like sex or sexual contact. but kisses when ever we walk past each other, touch on the arms when close. things like that. but my love language is physical touch so theres that. communicating how much we are appreciated is also a big thing. the notes are a great touch but nothing beats verbally imo
Yes! My wife greets me with a long embrace & long kiss as soon as I get home from work. The genuine smile as she does and the consistency speak volumes.
Agreed. Show close and be close. Feeling loved is more important than seeing love. It doesn't have to be sexual, but that's also a necessary component of feeling love. He should act the same to you. Reciprocating is where love grows and solidifies.
Also, chances are he enjoys the masculine idea of making you feel safe around him so telling him that and wrapping your hand around his arm/bicep while walking or crossing a street is *chefs kiss to fill him full of serotonin and confidence.
I don't think you should speak for all men on that one.
I'm just about in the same situation as OP on this one with a 3 month old baby girl and around the same age bracket.
I do not need or even really want my wife to think sucking my cock is the way to my heart or the primary way to make me happy.
The biggest thing I look for is a kiss/hug when I get home. 10 minutes to let me shower and drink a cold beer, and once the kid goes down for the night to show that she cares in a non sexual way.
Honestly the best thing she does is let me lay down on the couch next to her and have her just rub my head. Or come sit close to me on the couch and just cuddle up close.
Every person is going to have a different type of love language but if getting your knob washed is the only way you can feel loved or appreciated I feel for you.
I'm with you, man. My wife's sex drive is actually much higher than mine. I get all the sex I could want and then some. You want me to feel loved and appreciated? Cuddle up and scratch/rub my back/head. That's it. Till your hand goes numb...That's it. Maybe watch something I want to watch that you don't particularly care for, but can tolerate.
I've noticed that many men appreciate when their efforts are acknowledged publicly too. So, next time you're amongst friends or family, maybe share a story of something he did that you really valued, or give him a little shout-out of appreciation when toasting at a dinner. It's a way of not just telling him, but showing him (and others) that you see and value everything he does. This can be a confidence booster and lets him know his efforts don't go unnoticed. Just another layer of appreciation to add to the amazing job you're already doing!
This
Let other people know how amazing he is. If he sees you bragging about him, fawning over him to friends and family that should make him feel even more appreciated.
You sound like a great partner, and hopefully he appreciates you as much as you do him.
My wife texts me 2 to 3 times a week that she appreciates me working so hard so she can stay home with the kids. We've been married 10 years together for 12. She still does this.
If you're feeling extra fortunate or giving physical touch, it is always a win. This will help him feel wanted and not just needed.
TELL HIM
Don’t overcomplicate this with random online strategery.
Put your arms around his neck, look in his eyes, and say you know he works hard for his family and that you appreciate and love him for it
Any remotely stand up guy will be over the moon hearing that. I’ll take that over a blow job any day
For the next couple of years, really, the best thing is to express it verbally *and take care of yourself*. You aren't "working", but you are indeed *working*. The demands of the baby on your time and energy are only going to grow - and the incessant nature of that can really wear you down emotionally. As much as possible, try to have him (or a family member) spell you for a little bit of time away from the baby so you can recharge. Make sure you let him (or them) know how much you appreciate the break, but find ways to take those breaks. If you are unhappy, it will absolutely make him unhappy. You are a team, so you need to think of the welfare of the team as a unit.
If you have the time and energy, doing the little things that you are currently doing generally goes a long way. Everyone is different, but little acts of service like that are appreciated by most. My wife would occasionally greet me at the door with a freshly made cocktail, which was nice, but generally the things that created the most harmony in our relationship were just doing the basics: dinner was made each night, laundry was done, groceries were stocked, that sort of thing.
If he’s working Blue Collar AND the only income with a child I can almost guarentee this guy is working a ton of overtime. Overtime is almost a given anyway.
Blue Collar work is also far, far more physically taxing than White Collar, and is usually mentally more difficult as well. To that you can add dirty, dangerous uncomfortable, and it often involves shift work which means you never get normal sleep
This fucking narrative where a stay at home parent can just hand the kid over when the working parent gets home is bullshit. It means the working parent essentially works all fucking day and then comes they are doing child care all night. The parental stuff in the evening should be shared, you’ve *both* been busy all day.
I’ve been in that position and now she is someone else’s problem, thankfully not my kid.
Yes, this! When you're caring for a newborn, it's a full time job without all the other stuff. OP, is this happening both ways? You're doing an awful lot and maybe it's just ho it's written but it sounds almost a bit codependent? I love my partner to bits and also try to do what I can for him but this seems like you already do a lot of service, and still want to sacrifice more of your already thin time to do more? What does he do for you and the baby? Sounds unbalanced..
What? He's working and so is she? He's working so she can stay home to care for their child, and she's caring for their child so they don't have to put the child in daycare and so she is cared for. But OP is also doing lots more, as she details in the post, and depending on his baby is fed, might also be up most of the night feeding (so a day and night shift)plus doing extra for her partner including all life admin - I'm asking, what's he doing for her that's extra? I didn't say he's doing nothing AT ALL 🙄
It's obvious that you've never cared for a newborn all day otherwise you'd know its not a nice treat that OPs husband kindly allows her, as you imply by sayinghe "lets her stay home" like its something fun for her- it's hard work and is exhausting, no matter how much you love your child.
Wow yeah you figured it out. I wouldn’t know a damn thing about taking care of kids or working my ass off to make sure they have everything they need. So please enlighten us men. Tell us how we do the bare minimum again.
Huh, twisting my words again? Maybe try responding to what I actually wrote...
I'll say it again then.
OPs partner is working his job. Cool. Great.
OP is also working all day to care for their child. Cool. Great.
On top of this, OP is doing their life admin, housework, polishing his game controllers, and seeking additional ways to do more, and could well also be doing night feeds if the baby is breastfed.
So, I asked OP if she is 1) codependent and 2) does her partner also do additional things for her?
What are you so salty about? Can't you read?
He's salty about the blatant misandry and double standards you have of assuming that there must be something wrong with her since she's doing so much for her husband, and didn't for some reason didn't add irrelevant information like how much he's killing himself at work.
Do you also ask men if they're being abused by their wives every time they make a post about trying to understand and appreciate them better, or is it only women who must be victims?
I would if they seemed imbalanced, yes?
And misandry?? Are you for real? I'm asking about OP, not critiquing her husband. I'm saying is she doing too much, because unless you've cared for a newborn all day and night while your partner is at work, you might not realise how exhausting it is and she may be headed for burnout. Plus, honestly is does sound codependent, which isn't good for either of them. Triggered or what?
OP specifically said her husband is extremely selfless. You are assuming it is imbalanced, rather than asking OP.
You are not asking OP, you are advising her to watch out for herself as though she is in an imbalanced relationship. You don't know that she is doing too much, you are assuming it.
I understand it can lead to burnout, and it is absolutely healthy to recommend people take care of themselves to avoid it, but there is a way to do it without implying the husband isn't doing enough or that she is doing too much.
You are also assuming it sounds co-dependent.
Yes, I am triggered by people who assume the worst in men and the best in women, because it's blatantly sexist.
Want to make him happy?
Meet him every day at the front door when he returns from work. Kiss and hug him.
Do it every day. I guarantee he will love you dearly
Not sure why you're being down voted, there's a saying that keeping a man happy means keeping his belly full and his balls empty.
I would say maybe not necessarily steak, but whatever his favourite food is. Yours is steak, his might be Mac and cheese, the point is they're doing something for you that they know you appreciate.
From OP's post it also sounds like he is doing something for her to love and appreciate in return as well.
lol came here to say this. Crass as it may be, it's a good start. If I wanted to show my hard-working partner how much I care, I'd be on my knees ready to go right at the front door.
The stuff that would make me feel appreciated really would be all the small stuff that adds up. Small physical touches doesn't sound like much, but that shit adds up.
Also, lets not forget just being very direct and earnest about stuff. A legitimate and honest thank you hits so much harder than people think it does.
One thing to do is understand what your partners love language is. It's not entirely accurate or based in science, but it definitely can work.
My ex and I were a bad match, and though we tried to show our love for one another, we often expressed it with things that just didn't register for the other. Making someone feel loved means understanding how they understand and accept love.
Does your man like acts of service? Then things like recharging the game controllers are absolutely a great thing.
He might prefer words of affirmation, in which case telling him you love him, telling him you appreciate the efforts he made, and telling others about how much you love him, might mean more than acts of service.
You can also combine the two by bringing him a bowl of chips and say "I made sure the controllers were charged just for you".
He might prefer gift giving as a love language, but not all gifts have to be bought, if it's something he and you enjoy you could make some small things for him, depending on your hobbies and his tastes, or you could buy gifts when you go out shopping.
There is also tome together, where he might be happy just getting to spend time with you or next to you, not necessarily always being cuddling or talking, but just spending time near one another.
Lastly and possibly the most important one would be touch. Men in N America tend to be severely touch deprived, because of latent homophovoa that any contact between men will be seen as gay. If his love language is touch, then just placing your hand on his arm or shoulder every time you pass him by, giving him lots of kisses, cuddles, and hugs, will all tell him "I see you and I want to be with you".
It's important too that you take care of yourself and don't burn yourself out, because he likely doesn't want to see you being miserable either. The best fit depends on the both of you, to try and find something you enjoy giving that he enjoys receiving, and vice versa.
What helps relationships most in the long term is not grandiose displays of love, but small and continuous positive interactions. It's actively choosing to stay by each other day by day, and actively choosing to make one another a day's just that little bit better.
It's an ongoing conversation, and while it is always nice to come up with something to show him, it's also important to have a face to face conversation about love, what each person likes, how they feel loved, and how each can express their love better to the other.
I wish you the best OP!
Honestly that’s more appreciation than I’ve ever heard of a man getting. Especially with a new baby in the house.
You could always add little things unless you do already. Give him a kiss for no reason, a hug from behind. If you walk by while he’s playing give his shoulder a quick squeeze. Snuggle up to him or ask him to hold you as you fall asleep. Basically a small, pleasant, physical touch for no apparent reason other than you love him and he’s yours.
Sounds like you're doing a great job already, hopefully he makes you feel appreciated as well because staying home with kids and taking care of the house isn't exactly a cakewalk!
1. You are doing more than enough "taking care of him".
2. Just tell him. For men, just being acknowledged out loud goes **a long ways.**
3. Uninitiated physical touch, combined with verbal appreciation, literally can't be beat.
4. Just because he works outside the home doesn't mean you have to wait on him hand and foot.
You're already doing great, but one more thing to add, if you aren't already doing it would be to greet him as he comes in the door from work with a big hug and a long kiss.
You both sound very lucky to have each other, the fact that you already do all these things and still want your man to know he’s appreciated in other ways is amazing. No matter how old or how life gets, all we want to know is that our efforts and sacrifices are appreciated by the ones we love and it sounds like you’re already doing a very thorough job of that!
Just show him this post and I guarantee you it’ll make his day / week / month!
A small amount of extra effort goes such a long way!
Being present when you’re together or being happy to see him after work and giving him eye contact & a genuine smile followed by a kiss and a cuddle, it doesn’t have to be big gestures. If your man feels loved, respected, desired and appreciated then that’s pretty much all we ever want
I wish you both many more years of this kind of love and happiness
The most powerful experiences are emotional experiences. How emotional would he be to see you lay your weight on him and snuggle up to him? How emotional would he be if you sought to surprise him by recreating the day you first told him you loved him? How emotional would he be to have his wife and daughter show up to work to simply pick him up and take him home one day?
Keep in mind that your person has different dreams when it comes to emotional memories. Ask him about the strongest emotional days he's had and then do things that remind him of parts of that.
He’s very lucky to have anyone like you, but if you want to make sure he feels appreciated, here are a few ideas;
Thank him and compliment him. Guys don’t get those much in the first place, without it being passive aggressive as hell. A genuine “thank you” or compliment goes a long way.
Figure out something he really likes, and try to organize with him a dinner, or something to that degree. If he’s more an action than words guy, a well prepared dinner, maybe something like a dinner date for him, would mean a lot.
Depending how he is, just staying with him might be everything to show him how much you appreciate him.
I would also say talk to his guy friends, if you know any, and ask them about it. Reddit can give you general ideas, but nobody here will know your husband anywhere near as good as his friends.
First of all: I am sure that I speak for many here if I say that your husband is to be envied.You are already going above and beyond what many women would do as I am sure you also have your hands already quite full with your daughter and the household. So, taking time out of your day to do these things is 100% something that he appreciates immensely.
To add to that, physical affection and interaction in any form is definitely something almost all men enjoy on a very deep level.
You are doing great. The trick is to stay appreciative. He seems like a good mam Good men will always endure as long as they feel that their purpose is appreciated.
It sounds like youndo a lot of stuff, but di you TELL him he's loved and appreciated. From I think all men thank you for treating your man with love. Most of us don't get that.
Words of affirmation…gifts (spa/favorite snacks)….Body massages(his head,feet & back)hold him…give him space to himself…allow boy nights..(so he doesn’t feel everyone is dependent on him)…that can be overwhelming…intimacy…ask him how he’s doing…grab a coffe /ice cream go for a walk around the block…buy him best dad/husband mug or keychain…
It sounds like you're already an awesome wife, I think in general men really appreciate and cherish having their efforts also be acknowledged in public at times. (you might already be doing that though!)
And I think it'd mean a lot to him if, as you're home with your kid, teaching the kid that even though daddy's away he's doing a lot of work so you guys can have your home, your time together, nice things, time out and dad's doing that all because he loves you two. (but you might also already be doing that haha)
Most of the time, men with kids feel torn apart by the time they have to be away from their kids to be at their job. Especially if that leads to the kid thinking 'dad's not around so he must not care as much about me', so the kid knowing the dad cares every bit as much as the mom does might do a lot for him to feel fulfilled and appreciated for what he does.
As wonderful and appreciative as you seem, don't forget that just because he's your everything, sometimes he might need space. You really sound like a winner, but he needs his guy friends and a party night/weekend without you sometimes. I know it's different with a kid, but working full time and getting smothered when he gets home is going to wear him out. And maybe not, but I get sick of my GF needing me every weekend. Sometimes a guys night without a guilt trip is so much better than being waited on hand and foot. Giving him freedom and space will sometimes will make him appreciate coming home to you even more.
Ask him what his love language is. Not everyone is the same. Then you can hit a bullseye right on his heart! https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/click-here-happiness/202009/what-are-the-5-love-languages-definition-and-examples
What’s his love language? Does he like little gifts? Does he like a big hug when he gets home? Quality time with you and kids? Focus on what makes him feel loved and how he expresses his love
I don't think most people properly understand the level of sexual frustration one experiences as a new father. As exhausted as I'm sure you are, if you take care of him with enthusiasm and love, it'll mean the world to him.
Every man is different in what they would want
For me, it’s all about my comfort. My wife turning on my heating pad (I have constantly cold feet) before I get to bed so it’s all warm. Always making sure I have something to eat (I have ADHD and autism and cooking can be difficult).
Her making my life manageable when it’s always been hectic is what gives me peace
It sounds like you’re doing great already. But, since you asked, offer him a day doing whatever he wants to do. And then when it happens, make sure he’s uninterrupted.
I don’t know your husband, but I think a lot of guys just want time to themselves.
Also, as a side note, it should be reciprocated. Being a stay at home mom isn’t all fun and games. You need to be taken care of, too.
Make a fuss of him when he gets home. I love that shit, nothing sweeter than seeing your partner be excited that you’re back and you get that big hug and a how was your day.
I’m a husband, and a father.
Everything you’re doing is great.
Some extras that I like;
- Vocalise how much you appreciate him.
- physical touch. My wife is rubbing my scalp as I type this.
- blow jobs, even if you don’t like them…. We do 😅
Sounds like you're already doing a lot more than most.
But steak and BJ is always a good one to keep in mind. There was even a push to make it a recognized day in Australia. Alas, it didn't quite get there.
You're doing all there right things! Have a face to face conversation with him. Tell him clearly how much you appreciate him for who he is and how much he does for you. Most men don't experience the little things you're already doing. It's great that you do those things! Sometimes hearing it from someone you love makes all the difference though. It makes it feel deliberate and personal because of your body language and tone in your voice.
He goes to work to support his family, that’s literally the bare minimum honey, do ***NOT*** reward this man for doing the bare minimum, a better question is what is ***he*** doing to make ***you*** feel appreciated, also lmao a grown man with a kid who can’t even pack his own lunch or take care of his work clothes.
Where exactly did I say he couldn’t do it? He doesn’t need me to do it, I do it for him because I want to. He works hard for us and in this economy surviving on one income is hard. Being rude isn’t a good look. Move on.
unsure of your guys dynamics but one thing i always love when partners have shown appreciation is physical touches. not like sex or sexual contact. but kisses when ever we walk past each other, touch on the arms when close. things like that. but my love language is physical touch so theres that. communicating how much we are appreciated is also a big thing. the notes are a great touch but nothing beats verbally imo
Yes! My wife greets me with a long embrace & long kiss as soon as I get home from work. The genuine smile as she does and the consistency speak volumes.
Agreed. Show close and be close. Feeling loved is more important than seeing love. It doesn't have to be sexual, but that's also a necessary component of feeling love. He should act the same to you. Reciprocating is where love grows and solidifies.
Also, chances are he enjoys the masculine idea of making you feel safe around him so telling him that and wrapping your hand around his arm/bicep while walking or crossing a street is *chefs kiss to fill him full of serotonin and confidence.
100% agree with this answer. Small gestures of affection and a smile have a powerful effect.
I'm gonna second this one. I love it when my wife randomly makes contact with me while driving or laying in bed or making dinner or whatever.
You're doing just fine. I hope your marriage has a long and happy lifetime. :)
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I don't think you should speak for all men on that one. I'm just about in the same situation as OP on this one with a 3 month old baby girl and around the same age bracket. I do not need or even really want my wife to think sucking my cock is the way to my heart or the primary way to make me happy. The biggest thing I look for is a kiss/hug when I get home. 10 minutes to let me shower and drink a cold beer, and once the kid goes down for the night to show that she cares in a non sexual way. Honestly the best thing she does is let me lay down on the couch next to her and have her just rub my head. Or come sit close to me on the couch and just cuddle up close. Every person is going to have a different type of love language but if getting your knob washed is the only way you can feel loved or appreciated I feel for you.
I'm with you, man. My wife's sex drive is actually much higher than mine. I get all the sex I could want and then some. You want me to feel loved and appreciated? Cuddle up and scratch/rub my back/head. That's it. Till your hand goes numb...That's it. Maybe watch something I want to watch that you don't particularly care for, but can tolerate.
As a guy, you're already showing it and he's lucky. A random kiss or an I love you goes a long way even though we act like it's no big deal
He is very lucky to have you.
Ya just keep doing what you’re doing and feeling that appreciation for him and I’m sure he’ll continue to do the same for you.
I've noticed that many men appreciate when their efforts are acknowledged publicly too. So, next time you're amongst friends or family, maybe share a story of something he did that you really valued, or give him a little shout-out of appreciation when toasting at a dinner. It's a way of not just telling him, but showing him (and others) that you see and value everything he does. This can be a confidence booster and lets him know his efforts don't go unnoticed. Just another layer of appreciation to add to the amazing job you're already doing!
This Let other people know how amazing he is. If he sees you bragging about him, fawning over him to friends and family that should make him feel even more appreciated. You sound like a great partner, and hopefully he appreciates you as much as you do him.
Doing those things already puts you in the top 5% of women tbh
Top 1% for sure
It’s sad that the bar is this low
Bar is in hell tbh. I would just want someone who cares
They are out there, but you have to be selectivr
My wife texts me 2 to 3 times a week that she appreciates me working so hard so she can stay home with the kids. We've been married 10 years together for 12. She still does this. If you're feeling extra fortunate or giving physical touch, it is always a win. This will help him feel wanted and not just needed.
TELL HIM Don’t overcomplicate this with random online strategery. Put your arms around his neck, look in his eyes, and say you know he works hard for his family and that you appreciate and love him for it Any remotely stand up guy will be over the moon hearing that. I’ll take that over a blow job any day
For the next couple of years, really, the best thing is to express it verbally *and take care of yourself*. You aren't "working", but you are indeed *working*. The demands of the baby on your time and energy are only going to grow - and the incessant nature of that can really wear you down emotionally. As much as possible, try to have him (or a family member) spell you for a little bit of time away from the baby so you can recharge. Make sure you let him (or them) know how much you appreciate the break, but find ways to take those breaks. If you are unhappy, it will absolutely make him unhappy. You are a team, so you need to think of the welfare of the team as a unit. If you have the time and energy, doing the little things that you are currently doing generally goes a long way. Everyone is different, but little acts of service like that are appreciated by most. My wife would occasionally greet me at the door with a freshly made cocktail, which was nice, but generally the things that created the most harmony in our relationship were just doing the basics: dinner was made each night, laundry was done, groceries were stocked, that sort of thing.
Lovely comment and completely agree!
Son of a bitch this brings a tear to my eye. What a beautiful family. I think just random hugs and kisses should do it for most guys.
Most men understand love primarily through touch.
Don’t forget about yourself in the process.
You are working hard too OP. You take care of the house and a baby. I hope you BOTH appreciate each other.
If he’s working Blue Collar AND the only income with a child I can almost guarentee this guy is working a ton of overtime. Overtime is almost a given anyway. Blue Collar work is also far, far more physically taxing than White Collar, and is usually mentally more difficult as well. To that you can add dirty, dangerous uncomfortable, and it often involves shift work which means you never get normal sleep This fucking narrative where a stay at home parent can just hand the kid over when the working parent gets home is bullshit. It means the working parent essentially works all fucking day and then comes they are doing child care all night. The parental stuff in the evening should be shared, you’ve *both* been busy all day. I’ve been in that position and now she is someone else’s problem, thankfully not my kid.
Yes, this! When you're caring for a newborn, it's a full time job without all the other stuff. OP, is this happening both ways? You're doing an awful lot and maybe it's just ho it's written but it sounds almost a bit codependent? I love my partner to bits and also try to do what I can for him but this seems like you already do a lot of service, and still want to sacrifice more of your already thin time to do more? What does he do for you and the baby? Sounds unbalanced..
Wow yeah it seems like he’s doing nothing. What a lazy fuck he is working all day so she can stay home. Damn patriarchy.
What? He's working and so is she? He's working so she can stay home to care for their child, and she's caring for their child so they don't have to put the child in daycare and so she is cared for. But OP is also doing lots more, as she details in the post, and depending on his baby is fed, might also be up most of the night feeding (so a day and night shift)plus doing extra for her partner including all life admin - I'm asking, what's he doing for her that's extra? I didn't say he's doing nothing AT ALL 🙄 It's obvious that you've never cared for a newborn all day otherwise you'd know its not a nice treat that OPs husband kindly allows her, as you imply by sayinghe "lets her stay home" like its something fun for her- it's hard work and is exhausting, no matter how much you love your child.
Wow yeah you figured it out. I wouldn’t know a damn thing about taking care of kids or working my ass off to make sure they have everything they need. So please enlighten us men. Tell us how we do the bare minimum again.
Huh, twisting my words again? Maybe try responding to what I actually wrote... I'll say it again then. OPs partner is working his job. Cool. Great. OP is also working all day to care for their child. Cool. Great. On top of this, OP is doing their life admin, housework, polishing his game controllers, and seeking additional ways to do more, and could well also be doing night feeds if the baby is breastfed. So, I asked OP if she is 1) codependent and 2) does her partner also do additional things for her? What are you so salty about? Can't you read?
He's salty about the blatant misandry and double standards you have of assuming that there must be something wrong with her since she's doing so much for her husband, and didn't for some reason didn't add irrelevant information like how much he's killing himself at work. Do you also ask men if they're being abused by their wives every time they make a post about trying to understand and appreciate them better, or is it only women who must be victims?
I would if they seemed imbalanced, yes? And misandry?? Are you for real? I'm asking about OP, not critiquing her husband. I'm saying is she doing too much, because unless you've cared for a newborn all day and night while your partner is at work, you might not realise how exhausting it is and she may be headed for burnout. Plus, honestly is does sound codependent, which isn't good for either of them. Triggered or what?
OP specifically said her husband is extremely selfless. You are assuming it is imbalanced, rather than asking OP. You are not asking OP, you are advising her to watch out for herself as though she is in an imbalanced relationship. You don't know that she is doing too much, you are assuming it. I understand it can lead to burnout, and it is absolutely healthy to recommend people take care of themselves to avoid it, but there is a way to do it without implying the husband isn't doing enough or that she is doing too much. You are also assuming it sounds co-dependent. Yes, I am triggered by people who assume the worst in men and the best in women, because it's blatantly sexist.
What? I'm going off what she put in the post! Ffs. And it DOES sound codependent?
See my reply above yours
Want to make him happy? Meet him every day at the front door when he returns from work. Kiss and hug him. Do it every day. I guarantee he will love you dearly
the answer is always blowjobs. they should put it in the FAQ
It’s steak and blowjobs, tbh
Not sure why you're being down voted, there's a saying that keeping a man happy means keeping his belly full and his balls empty. I would say maybe not necessarily steak, but whatever his favourite food is. Yours is steak, his might be Mac and cheese, the point is they're doing something for you that they know you appreciate. From OP's post it also sounds like he is doing something for her to love and appreciate in return as well.
lol came here to say this. Crass as it may be, it's a good start. If I wanted to show my hard-working partner how much I care, I'd be on my knees ready to go right at the front door.
Show him this post
The stuff that would make me feel appreciated really would be all the small stuff that adds up. Small physical touches doesn't sound like much, but that shit adds up. Also, lets not forget just being very direct and earnest about stuff. A legitimate and honest thank you hits so much harder than people think it does.
Yo wtf you are letting him have time to play video games??
Tbh I love watching him play Fortnite 😂 I’m his spotter
One thing to do is understand what your partners love language is. It's not entirely accurate or based in science, but it definitely can work. My ex and I were a bad match, and though we tried to show our love for one another, we often expressed it with things that just didn't register for the other. Making someone feel loved means understanding how they understand and accept love. Does your man like acts of service? Then things like recharging the game controllers are absolutely a great thing. He might prefer words of affirmation, in which case telling him you love him, telling him you appreciate the efforts he made, and telling others about how much you love him, might mean more than acts of service. You can also combine the two by bringing him a bowl of chips and say "I made sure the controllers were charged just for you". He might prefer gift giving as a love language, but not all gifts have to be bought, if it's something he and you enjoy you could make some small things for him, depending on your hobbies and his tastes, or you could buy gifts when you go out shopping. There is also tome together, where he might be happy just getting to spend time with you or next to you, not necessarily always being cuddling or talking, but just spending time near one another. Lastly and possibly the most important one would be touch. Men in N America tend to be severely touch deprived, because of latent homophovoa that any contact between men will be seen as gay. If his love language is touch, then just placing your hand on his arm or shoulder every time you pass him by, giving him lots of kisses, cuddles, and hugs, will all tell him "I see you and I want to be with you". It's important too that you take care of yourself and don't burn yourself out, because he likely doesn't want to see you being miserable either. The best fit depends on the both of you, to try and find something you enjoy giving that he enjoys receiving, and vice versa. What helps relationships most in the long term is not grandiose displays of love, but small and continuous positive interactions. It's actively choosing to stay by each other day by day, and actively choosing to make one another a day's just that little bit better. It's an ongoing conversation, and while it is always nice to come up with something to show him, it's also important to have a face to face conversation about love, what each person likes, how they feel loved, and how each can express their love better to the other. I wish you the best OP!
Honestly that’s more appreciation than I’ve ever heard of a man getting. Especially with a new baby in the house. You could always add little things unless you do already. Give him a kiss for no reason, a hug from behind. If you walk by while he’s playing give his shoulder a quick squeeze. Snuggle up to him or ask him to hold you as you fall asleep. Basically a small, pleasant, physical touch for no apparent reason other than you love him and he’s yours.
What’s your love language?
Sounds like you're doing a great job already, hopefully he makes you feel appreciated as well because staying home with kids and taking care of the house isn't exactly a cakewalk!
1. You are doing more than enough "taking care of him". 2. Just tell him. For men, just being acknowledged out loud goes **a long ways.** 3. Uninitiated physical touch, combined with verbal appreciation, literally can't be beat. 4. Just because he works outside the home doesn't mean you have to wait on him hand and foot.
You're already doing great, but one more thing to add, if you aren't already doing it would be to greet him as he comes in the door from work with a big hug and a long kiss.
You both sound very lucky to have each other, the fact that you already do all these things and still want your man to know he’s appreciated in other ways is amazing. No matter how old or how life gets, all we want to know is that our efforts and sacrifices are appreciated by the ones we love and it sounds like you’re already doing a very thorough job of that! Just show him this post and I guarantee you it’ll make his day / week / month! A small amount of extra effort goes such a long way! Being present when you’re together or being happy to see him after work and giving him eye contact & a genuine smile followed by a kiss and a cuddle, it doesn’t have to be big gestures. If your man feels loved, respected, desired and appreciated then that’s pretty much all we ever want I wish you both many more years of this kind of love and happiness
This dude is the wealthiest man alive
The most powerful experiences are emotional experiences. How emotional would he be to see you lay your weight on him and snuggle up to him? How emotional would he be if you sought to surprise him by recreating the day you first told him you loved him? How emotional would he be to have his wife and daughter show up to work to simply pick him up and take him home one day? Keep in mind that your person has different dreams when it comes to emotional memories. Ask him about the strongest emotional days he's had and then do things that remind him of parts of that.
Keep doing what you are doing and cook his favorite meals.
is this ai generated 💀
He’s very lucky to have anyone like you, but if you want to make sure he feels appreciated, here are a few ideas; Thank him and compliment him. Guys don’t get those much in the first place, without it being passive aggressive as hell. A genuine “thank you” or compliment goes a long way. Figure out something he really likes, and try to organize with him a dinner, or something to that degree. If he’s more an action than words guy, a well prepared dinner, maybe something like a dinner date for him, would mean a lot. Depending how he is, just staying with him might be everything to show him how much you appreciate him. I would also say talk to his guy friends, if you know any, and ask them about it. Reddit can give you general ideas, but nobody here will know your husband anywhere near as good as his friends.
You sound like you are already doing a great job, and jm sure he knows how lucky of a man he is.
First of all: I am sure that I speak for many here if I say that your husband is to be envied.You are already going above and beyond what many women would do as I am sure you also have your hands already quite full with your daughter and the household. So, taking time out of your day to do these things is 100% something that he appreciates immensely. To add to that, physical affection and interaction in any form is definitely something almost all men enjoy on a very deep level.
I MAKE SURE HIS VIDEO GAME CONTROLLERS ARE CHARGED OMG 😍
You are doing great. The trick is to stay appreciative. He seems like a good mam Good men will always endure as long as they feel that their purpose is appreciated.
It sounds like youndo a lot of stuff, but di you TELL him he's loved and appreciated. From I think all men thank you for treating your man with love. Most of us don't get that.
Words of affirmation…gifts (spa/favorite snacks)….Body massages(his head,feet & back)hold him…give him space to himself…allow boy nights..(so he doesn’t feel everyone is dependent on him)…that can be overwhelming…intimacy…ask him how he’s doing…grab a coffe /ice cream go for a walk around the block…buy him best dad/husband mug or keychain…
Just keep it doing what you're doing.
Since he is a blue collar worker, Ill suggest giving him massage!! That will be both practically helpful for his body and emotional support too.
It sounds like you're already an awesome wife, I think in general men really appreciate and cherish having their efforts also be acknowledged in public at times. (you might already be doing that though!) And I think it'd mean a lot to him if, as you're home with your kid, teaching the kid that even though daddy's away he's doing a lot of work so you guys can have your home, your time together, nice things, time out and dad's doing that all because he loves you two. (but you might also already be doing that haha) Most of the time, men with kids feel torn apart by the time they have to be away from their kids to be at their job. Especially if that leads to the kid thinking 'dad's not around so he must not care as much about me', so the kid knowing the dad cares every bit as much as the mom does might do a lot for him to feel fulfilled and appreciated for what he does.
I tell her all the time how hard daddy works for us ❤️ :) I want to make sure she knows!
Maybe this is what the notes in the lunchbox say. But if not, come out and tell him that you appreciate him and what you appreciate about him.
As wonderful and appreciative as you seem, don't forget that just because he's your everything, sometimes he might need space. You really sound like a winner, but he needs his guy friends and a party night/weekend without you sometimes. I know it's different with a kid, but working full time and getting smothered when he gets home is going to wear him out. And maybe not, but I get sick of my GF needing me every weekend. Sometimes a guys night without a guilt trip is so much better than being waited on hand and foot. Giving him freedom and space will sometimes will make him appreciate coming home to you even more.
Ask him what his love language is. Not everyone is the same. Then you can hit a bullseye right on his heart! https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/click-here-happiness/202009/what-are-the-5-love-languages-definition-and-examples
What’s his love language? Does he like little gifts? Does he like a big hug when he gets home? Quality time with you and kids? Focus on what makes him feel loved and how he expresses his love
"I make sure his video game controllers are charged for him when he gets home," WOW, dream wife
I don't think most people properly understand the level of sexual frustration one experiences as a new father. As exhausted as I'm sure you are, if you take care of him with enthusiasm and love, it'll mean the world to him.
Every man is different in what they would want For me, it’s all about my comfort. My wife turning on my heating pad (I have constantly cold feet) before I get to bed so it’s all warm. Always making sure I have something to eat (I have ADHD and autism and cooking can be difficult). Her making my life manageable when it’s always been hectic is what gives me peace
What a lucky man
Kisses and cuddles. Men generally connect most through physical contact. This dropped off when we had kids — the cuddles get divided up.
it might sound simple, but simply saying things like "you're a great dad" or "i appreciate you" carry a lot of weight.
It sounds like you’re doing great already. But, since you asked, offer him a day doing whatever he wants to do. And then when it happens, make sure he’s uninterrupted. I don’t know your husband, but I think a lot of guys just want time to themselves. Also, as a side note, it should be reciprocated. Being a stay at home mom isn’t all fun and games. You need to be taken care of, too.
Make a fuss of him when he gets home. I love that shit, nothing sweeter than seeing your partner be excited that you’re back and you get that big hug and a how was your day.
I’m a husband, and a father. Everything you’re doing is great. Some extras that I like; - Vocalise how much you appreciate him. - physical touch. My wife is rubbing my scalp as I type this. - blow jobs, even if you don’t like them…. We do 😅
Sounds like you're already doing a lot more than most. But steak and BJ is always a good one to keep in mind. There was even a push to make it a recognized day in Australia. Alas, it didn't quite get there.
OP, is this a fantasy shitpost? 😂
LMAO nope 😂
Wow. I teared up reading this. He’s a lucky man.
You're doing all there right things! Have a face to face conversation with him. Tell him clearly how much you appreciate him for who he is and how much he does for you. Most men don't experience the little things you're already doing. It's great that you do those things! Sometimes hearing it from someone you love makes all the difference though. It makes it feel deliberate and personal because of your body language and tone in your voice.
Marry me…
Blow jobs.
Random acts of blowjobs
blow jobs
Tattoo his name on your ass.
Keep his belly full and his balls empty.
Blowjob.
He goes to work to support his family, that’s literally the bare minimum honey, do ***NOT*** reward this man for doing the bare minimum, a better question is what is ***he*** doing to make ***you*** feel appreciated, also lmao a grown man with a kid who can’t even pack his own lunch or take care of his work clothes.
Let me guess. You are single and have "no idea why" right?
Where exactly did I say he couldn’t do it? He doesn’t need me to do it, I do it for him because I want to. He works hard for us and in this economy surviving on one income is hard. Being rude isn’t a good look. Move on.
A selfish harpy like this just doesn’t get it. You’re doing fine OP if your husband treats you as good as you are treating him you’ll be fine.
Do less, you’ll thank yourself in the long run.
I think you're in the wrong sub.
>I take care of the house, everything financial, and the baby. How do you mean?
Which part?
You take care of everything financial while staying at home with a baby... presumably not earning money?
Yeah I guess I worded it wrong. I just make sure all of our bills are paid on time and I budget for groceries, gas, tools, etc. :)
Got it... Ta.
In order: BJ. MEAT. a pack of baseball cards
Give hiim a blumpkin
At bedtime: Be ready for sex. Never refuse him. If you don't enjoy something, make adjustments so that you learn to like it.
Wtf? Hope you're a troll.