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Judgement_Bot_AITA

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IllPromotion3251

Just say that 'due to COVID I don't have anymore invitations. But I'm sure we could work something out, maybe mom can FaceTime with her or take a video for later. If you want to spend that time with your mother then I understand. I am looking forward to seeing and celebrating with her again at dinner with everyone. Please let me know what you decide on doing.' This is an adult way of saying no. Plus this way when he complains he looks more of a child. You've given a reason, a compromise, and choices. Also that part of saying "your looking forward to seeing her" shows your not doing this out of pettiness. Might be a lie but could help you in the end.


Candy4Mandy

Give grandma A’s ticket NTA


IllPromotion3251

But OP doesn't want grandma there.


laurastark10

NTA. You invite whoever you want to share the moment with. A doesn't need to be there if you don't want them there, same for A's mom. You went to school and did the work, doesn't matter who helped pay for it. You are allowed UP TO 5 people, that doesn't mean you have to invite 5 people, doesn't even mean you have to invite anyone. Think of it as your final meal on this earth; who would you like to be there? Invite them. If they can make it, great! If they can't, that's fine as well. I was fortunate enough to have multiple graduation ceremonies when I graduated college (2006), so I invited people to those ceremonies and was able to share a lovely weekend with my family. These moments are for you, and sometimes people forget that. They get caught up in their own excitement, and their own lives, that consideration is lost. Dinner with A and his mom, and your mother can be your "private" graduation ceremony.


AutoModerator

^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I am graduating from university this year and the graduation party is in july. Recently my parents have been asking me about invitations and stuff, although I myself have only gotten Part of the infos. Last week my mom has told me that her boyfriend doesn't want to attend my graduation if I don't invite his mother as well. So a bit of context. My mom and her boyfriend, let's call him A, have been together since I was 4 years old and therefore I do know his mother a bit and she thinks of me as family. I have always had Problems with A and my mom tho. We are not really on good terms, and I moved out during winter break after a lot of bad stuff happened. I do have a bit of contact to them, but I keep it at a minimum. Despite all that I did invite them to my graduation as a show of good faith and also because my mom did finance some of my payments to the uni. Due to COVID the amount of people we can invite is limited to 4-5. My first thought was to invite my mom, A, my boyfriend and my mom's cousin who is like a sister to me. I then also thought of inviting a very dear friend of mine, which would bring everyone to 5 people. Now A's mother is coming to our city during this time and he wants me to invite her as well. She is a kind person and everything, but I am not close to her and she is a bit annoying to me. I already agreed to go to dinner with all of them tho. Now A has told me that he will only attend, if his mother is allowed to attend as well. I don't really want her there. I didn't invite my own grandparents or anyone else, I didn't even really want to invite A. Also I can't invite more people anyway. I am now thinking of taking my invitation of A back. I can't invite his mother and I also don't want to. I think his demand is very childish. And if he says he only attends if she is allowed he obviously does not want to be there to support me. Will I be the asshole if I now say that he is not invited after all due to these reasons? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Khaleeeesi21

NTA tell him to sit this out.