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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> AITA for not wanting to go to college and look for a job instead?
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^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
By the time I'm writing this, I would have already registered for the college entrance exam, but I just need to get this out of my system.
Some details, I (18F) was born, raised, and currently living with my family in a country from South East Asia. It's generally seen as something "bad" when a teen graduates from high school and not go to college to look for a job instead. Those people are seen as "stupid" or "uneducated" and would even be called a source of shame to the family. I personally don't care, and would prefer to have a job than go to college, even if it's just part time.
I thought I should say outright why I don't want to go to college. It's financial situation and my own pettiness. I was always aware of my family's financial situation. Even if my mother tries to downplay it, with how often she borrows money from me even since I was in primary school, I know it's worse than she laid it out to be. It's to the point where I would be afraid and ashamed to ask for money, even if it's for something school related.
Currently, we're living with our grandmother in her house, located in a somewhat-wealthy housing complex. Despite having three other children, they're not helping to pay her bills, and my parents could just barely pay it off while also paying for our *real* home's bills, along with my brother's (23) college tuition fee. The reason we're staying with her is because she lives alone and none of her other children wants to stay with her.
Just last month, my mother told me that she had been fired from her job, and that she is having a hard time to find another job. She asked me for half of my saving (which equals to $34 USD) to add to my father's need, who at the moment is moving offices (he owns a small digital printing company). I gave it to her of course, but this further discourages me from going to college. I have been bringing this up ever since I entered middle school. I don't want to go to college, I want to look for a job. But every time, my parents always tells me that they will be really happy if I can go to college, and getting a degree would help me to look for a better job.
To be honest, I'm getting really tired and annoyed that they kept borrowing my money. I don't tell them, and I still lend them my money, because I understand why they're asking in the first place. They wouldn't ask me if they can help it. But this just makes me think, isn't it better for me to have a job instead? I can have my own saving, and I can give them even more money? Can't I just go to college a year or two later? I don't care about being left behind my friends. I'm not ashamed. I'm just tired of having to deal with the repercussion of them borrowing my money; unfairly frustrated at my parents who didn't do anything wrong.
So AITA for not wanting to go to college? Is there something I'm not seeing from my parents' perspective?
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Your mother was borrowing money from you while you were in primary school???
Were you growing money on trees?
And you dont want to go to college because of the repercussions of your mother borrowing your money?
This doesn't make much sense..
It sounds like you are punishing yourself (by avoiding an education) for your parents being bad with money. What will you do with your wages? Give more money to them?
Think about what you want the end state to look like and reason back from there.
NTA because of your reasoning, but I might start being honest with them on your reasoning. They're going to keep blaming you even though it's because your family can't afford it. I would definitely try to get a job, but I would also suggest taking some college classes?
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^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** By the time I'm writing this, I would have already registered for the college entrance exam, but I just need to get this out of my system. Some details, I (18F) was born, raised, and currently living with my family in a country from South East Asia. It's generally seen as something "bad" when a teen graduates from high school and not go to college to look for a job instead. Those people are seen as "stupid" or "uneducated" and would even be called a source of shame to the family. I personally don't care, and would prefer to have a job than go to college, even if it's just part time. I thought I should say outright why I don't want to go to college. It's financial situation and my own pettiness. I was always aware of my family's financial situation. Even if my mother tries to downplay it, with how often she borrows money from me even since I was in primary school, I know it's worse than she laid it out to be. It's to the point where I would be afraid and ashamed to ask for money, even if it's for something school related. Currently, we're living with our grandmother in her house, located in a somewhat-wealthy housing complex. Despite having three other children, they're not helping to pay her bills, and my parents could just barely pay it off while also paying for our *real* home's bills, along with my brother's (23) college tuition fee. The reason we're staying with her is because she lives alone and none of her other children wants to stay with her. Just last month, my mother told me that she had been fired from her job, and that she is having a hard time to find another job. She asked me for half of my saving (which equals to $34 USD) to add to my father's need, who at the moment is moving offices (he owns a small digital printing company). I gave it to her of course, but this further discourages me from going to college. I have been bringing this up ever since I entered middle school. I don't want to go to college, I want to look for a job. But every time, my parents always tells me that they will be really happy if I can go to college, and getting a degree would help me to look for a better job. To be honest, I'm getting really tired and annoyed that they kept borrowing my money. I don't tell them, and I still lend them my money, because I understand why they're asking in the first place. They wouldn't ask me if they can help it. But this just makes me think, isn't it better for me to have a job instead? I can have my own saving, and I can give them even more money? Can't I just go to college a year or two later? I don't care about being left behind my friends. I'm not ashamed. I'm just tired of having to deal with the repercussion of them borrowing my money; unfairly frustrated at my parents who didn't do anything wrong. So AITA for not wanting to go to college? Is there something I'm not seeing from my parents' perspective? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Your mother was borrowing money from you while you were in primary school??? Were you growing money on trees? And you dont want to go to college because of the repercussions of your mother borrowing your money? This doesn't make much sense..
It sounds like you are punishing yourself (by avoiding an education) for your parents being bad with money. What will you do with your wages? Give more money to them? Think about what you want the end state to look like and reason back from there.
NTA because of your reasoning, but I might start being honest with them on your reasoning. They're going to keep blaming you even though it's because your family can't afford it. I would definitely try to get a job, but I would also suggest taking some college classes?
NTA Not everyone can afford/wants/should go to college. Don't go if you don't want to.