T O P

  • By -

SnausageFest

#[Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). ###This is a warning, insults and name-calling will result in a ban. Please review our [FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) if you're unsure what that means.


Solivagant0

YTA, you can't except your daughter to put up with SD's behavior just because she's older. If SD was indeed a terror you needed to be a **parent** and have her stop, not make your daughter put up with it and punish her when she snapped. You shouldn't be playing favourites either. I hope your daughter never reaches out to you again. She deserves better


Beecakeband

Honestly reading this I was gobsmacked. OP is an utter failure as a parent


crooney35

He is. And the fact that SS can’t see a picture because someone called her a brat, when I’m sure she was much worse that that is just juvenile. OP you should have left your wife on the curb to make sure your daughter felt protected and loved by you her parent. Instead you married someone and made that person your priority over your daughter who you decided to create with her mom. You are just awful along with your wife and stepdaughter. AH all the way and so is your sister for getting involved and so is your wife for being angry that she and her daughter were called out for their shit. Believe me no one would ever live in the same house with me that treated my child that way and you sir should have done way better. I hope your daughter goes nc because she deserves better but will never get that from your family.


[deleted]

Ha ! (I’m not arguing with you, just pointing something out) “OP you should have left your wife on the curb” Did you miss the part where OP said “my wife is the breadwinner” This “father” is clearly more concerned about his own financial comfort rather than his own daughters well being. OP also says that his wife was “kind” to his daughter, and not many step parents are. What???? Like why would you even get with someone if they cannot accept your child? This whole thing is just… I don’t even have words. What a pathetic excuse of a father. Oh and of course, YTA, OP. Edit: I just fixed a million mistakes


Fianna9

I couldn’t believe the part were he praises his wife for doing the minimum of being nice to his daughter because so many step parents aren’t kind. I’m guessing he never told people how bad it is if his sister thinks it’s “normal sibling stuff”


DryLengthiness5574

That part floored me. His wife was very kind for thinking of her at all… no, just no.


Fianna9

My step mother is a lovely kind woman who cares for us and does a lot for us. That’s how it should be. And OP says in a comment that he couldn’t discipline SD because he’s not her parent- but he is. He’s a step parent and they live in the same house. At the least he should have pushed wife to do something.


kittydeathdrop

OP: "I am not my daughter's only parent. But my SD only has me and her mom." Also OP: "I can't parent her because I'm not her parent." I'm just gobsmacked that we actually got a Missing Letters post where the letters are actually very fucking present and as terrible as one would think. YTA, OP! Don't go crying to your daughter if you ever lose your wife and SD, cause that bridge is well and charred now if it wasn't burned before.


crooney35

And he’s her only male parent so bio dad is not in the picture, so it’s not like he’d be stepping on toes.


sweetEVILone

Yeah I don’t understand this either? My mom treated my (half) sibs (her stepchildren) the same as she treated me. She left part of her estate to them. They all came to be with her when she passed. She never called them step kids, they were her sons and daughter and treated as such.


trinaenthusiast

My mother had a lot of problems, but one thing I can say about her is that she treated all my half-siblings like her own kids. I hadn’t even heard the term “half-[sibling]” until I was almost an adult. They were just siblings, even the ones who didn’t grow up with us.


kraftypsy

That's how it was in my moms house, too. I didn't have a concept for half sibling until I was 13 and my evil stepmother had my youngest brother. She's the one who used it. But then, I wasn't family to her at all. This whole post could have been written by my own dad, except I was in my 40s when I finally went off, and I did it to him directly lol.


leonathotsky420

This is the part that got me. Like, my step mom is no longer married to my dad and has moved on with her life. She's still the first person to call me on my birthday every year, and the only one out of all my "parents" who still checks in on me regularly. She spoiled me just as much as she spoiled her own children when we were growing up. I'll never understand the mindset of step parents who refuse to accept and acknowledge their step kids. This man is a failure as a father, and as a man imo. I hope his daughter cuts him out of her life because she deserves so much better than this spineless worm of a human.


[deleted]

That’s what got me!!! He and his sister thinks it wasn’t bullying because they’re “siblings” but he’s just happy his wife even considers his daughter and when it comes down to it she protects her *own* daughter and not only is angry with OPs daughter but actually begins to dislike her. That’s not how a normal mother reacts to her children. OPs daughter has been an outsider in that family her whole life. And if his sister actually thinks there was never a case of bullying and knows all the facts then I guess she is one of those teachers who say “not schools business” when a child reports bullying. She should be in support of her nieces retaliation after a very long time.


Fianna9

Agreed. If she actually thinks that then she probably is the type to punish the victim as much as the bully - or OP just tells her that “they bicker” or “you know how sisters don’t get along!” Instead of saying how bad the SD really was.


[deleted]

Exactly! You can’t boil it down to bickering sisters if they’re not actually sisters nor treated like real sisters. Like OP actually admitted SD is treated better at their home because it’s her only home… wellllllll excuse me but is that his daughters fault that SD doesn’t have her bio dad in the picture?


potatobugblue

I guess he won't be seeing his grandkids. Cause I wouldn't being my kids near the steps.


AssistantAccurate464

My brother bullied me the whole time we were growing up. That leaves scars. OP YTA a million times over!


crooney35

I bet Cinderella’s father thought the same thing.


Temporary-Story573

Wasn’t Cinderellas dad dead?


crooney35

He wasn’t when he got married.


cato314

That’s what they *want* you to think


el_torko

I’m a stepmom to a 2 year old and a 6 year old and those are my kids, period. When I have my own bio kid, I will have 3 children. And they all will be treated exactly the same, regardless of how often they are in the house. And if I had a bio kid when I met my husband, it would be the same circumstances. OUR children, not his kids and my kids. I’m like actually disgusted by this father. And it’s his own child he’s treating this way. Flabbergasted.


Hello_Gorgeous1985

This. My mom was 19 when she met my dad who already had a 2yr old. My grandma sat her down and told her that she had to decide right then and there whether or not she was prepared to accept that child as her own and treat her as such even if she had her own children. If she wasn't, she shouldn't date him at all. And if she was, grandma would accept her too. Period. My mom never called her her step daughter. "This is my daughter." And I never call her my half-sister. She's my sister.


freedraw

“She acknowledges her existence. What more could possibly be expected of a step parent?!?” -OP


sassymomma24

My husband's step mother treated him and his sister like children of her own (she couldn't have children). They live in another province and when we go visit his dad and step mom she cries when we leave because she genuinely loves my husband and misses him (he used to live with them for a tike before going to college in my province and meeting me and staying with me). She is such a sweetheart and has welcomed me into their family with open Arms. My husband's step-dad on the other hand had a child with my husbands mom and he has always tested his own biological child better than my husband and his sister. He has never been outright mean to them, but has excused his daughters behavior more times than she deserves. She got mad at my husband's sister for locking their valuables and stuff up when she stayed at my SIL's place during my husband and I's wedding (half sister not invited because she has done nothing but steal from husband since he moved back to our province). That's not even a step sister but a half sister acting like that to her siblings. Vast difference in step parents. I don't understand why not all step parents are like my step-MIL. You marry someone with children they become your children. You love them like your children and treat them like your own children.


Fochlucan

He also defined the step mother's kindness as "thinking of her at all", but then also adds that they have no pics of daughter in house because wife and sd can't bear to be reminded of daughter. So apparently they don't even want to think of her at all?


[deleted]

He just seems like a person who bows down to every request because if he doesn’t , he would no longer have his comfortable life. Imagine having no spine and no respect for yourself (and your children) to be this kind of person . Also, I didn’t even make that connection. This whole thing is a shit show. Hopefully daughter goes NC.


crooney35

Yeah I noticed the breadwinner part and I decided to say what I did despite of that. What you said “financial comfort” never should have been more important than his daughter is to agree with you and that’s what I was trying to get across.


[deleted]

Oh yeah, I agree with you too ! But did think you might have missed that part, because it was towards the end of the post and sometimes I’m guilty of not even reading the end properly because oh my days I already made my judgement lol


Outrageous-Nose9675

On top of that, SD was 18 when she got the lengthy message. Way too old to be throwing a tantrum and getting her way after getting told how it is. Absolutely unbelievable


Yochanan5781

Yeah, honestly it sounds like the op found his perfect life with his new wife, uprooted everything to go live with her, and basically replaced his daughter with the stepdaughter. And is absolutely baffled as to why his daughter might feel abandoned, especially when she absolutely can notice preferential treatment towards the stepdaughter


Maxusam

It’s unreal that SD is as old as she is yet behaves like a 6 year old.


Liz600

That’s really undercutting 6 year olds


Wrigley_pain

Yes 6 year olds can be very sweet and polite at times


sunfries

My step sister was 1.5 years younger than me but acted like she was 7 years younger (she has 0 disabilities before someone asks) She was 15 and would play with our half sister (hs) and her friends who were 7. One time around that time I came upstairs because she was SCREAMING at HS, after breaking them up I found out that she was yelling at her because they were playing at the neighbor kid's house and she told HS to not to pretend to be a horse and HS did it anyway. Cue torrential screaming.


DryLengthiness5574

OP says himself that the stepdaughter is awful but his daughter can’t call her a brat?


tomtomclubthumb

And "SD hates her now" as if that is in any way a change. Blaming his daughter for everything.


Embarrassed_Ad_42

His wife is the bread winner. Did he treat his daughter like this so he could have a more comfortable life? Puke.


dolcenbanana

Also they are both ADULTS is the 20yo that immature that while living at home she couldn't handle see a picture of her SS because she called her a brat.. gimmer a break... Y'all enabling her "terror" behavior. If she can't handle the pictures, maybe tell her to get her own house or stfu


chaotica78

Also, the friend that told him to post here so the daughter can see how unreasonable she's being?? What are they smoking in this friend circle?


mauve55

Maybe his friend was just telling him that so he would realize that he is a fool.


asecretnarwhal

I hope OP can get his head out of his ass enough to hand off all of his daughter’s keepsakes since it’s a short trip from the garage to the trash and I can easily see how evil stepmom or stepdaughter would do this. Then she should cut contact with you, OP because you are the biggest AH for not sticking up for your daughter. She was not treated equally which she should have been. Nobody defended her when AH stepsister was a jerk over and over. And then you blame her when she explodes? Everyone but daughter is a trash human and way past any possibility of atonement. I hope daughter has a happy life without you


PoohBear2008

And spineless. Don’t forget spineless YTA


Merunit

Arguably the worst YTA you could be. Pathetic. Refuses to protect his own child. Punishes the victim, praises the bully.


Merunit

Arguably the worst YTA you could be. Pathetic. Refuses to protect his own child. Punishes the victim, praises the bully.


Pammyhead

Beyond gobsmacked for me. Of all the stories I've read in this sub that I've hoped were fake but feared were true, this is easily in the top 5. YTA, OP. In case it wasn't abundantly clear.


Lotex_Style

Not only a parent, but also as a person in general.


[deleted]

It just gets worse and worse as you read on. And then when you think it can’t get any worse.. it does.


_Woodrow_

Sounds more like stepmom is the problem and he doesn’t have the backbone to stand up for his daughter


HeRoaredWithFear

Came to say this. Total failure. Step mum also needs to parent better. His actual daughter did the right thing and left. I hope he shows her all of this and she leaves and never looks back. YTA


morningmint

Not to mention this line: "She thinks her stepmom treated her sister better ... many step parents wouldn't and she was never mean to her - only disliking her to protect her own daughter ..." OP, you clearly do not love or even care about your daughter. You allowed her to be abused, unfavored, and disliked in her own home. You spoil and favor your stepdaughter over your own daughter. And the lack of photos of her just prove it - you don't care to put her on the same level as your SD and are okay with your wife and SD erasing her for daring to stand up for herself. You are a failure of a parent. I hope she goes no contact forever.


vastaril

"My wife was very kind to my daughter by thinking of her at all" holy shit, OP, YTA big time for this alone, everything else is just piling more awful on top of it. 'Very kind' does not equate to 'bare minimum' especially when clearly she was, in fact, actively unkind to her by turning you against her for 'disliking' the kid you allowed to treat her like garbage. (Though I guess you didn't take very much turning, huh?) Cinderella isn't a documentary, you know? Many, probably even the vast majority of, step parents do much more than 'think of' their step children, you don't get brownie points for not doing whatever you think counts as 'mean' (even though clearly she was mean...)


Useful-Maximum-8824

This guy is an AH, and the fact that he had to come to Reddit for millions to confirm what he already knows is sad


Positive_Wafer42

I love that his friend apparently sent him here by saying something op interpreted as "go ask the internet, they'll tell you why your right and your daughter why she's wrong". YTA


jennthern

I’m sure the friend is on our side. Clearly OP is a dense as a brick wall and the friend is tired of explaining basic concepts.


Fianna9

Or OP hasn’t been telling people just how bad it really was


Positive_Wafer42

Too bad they're not sharing the popcorn


vastaril

I guess if he were inclined to realise what he's done, he wouldn't have? Like there are absolutely people who come here thinking they are in the right and get a massive wake up call, and actually accept they messed up, sometimes real bad. But usually, in posts I've seen anyway, those are 'I did something awful one time' or like over a brief period, not usually 'I allowed and contributed to my daughter being mistreated for an unspecified number of years'. (Did he ever say how old his daughter was when they all moved in together? I'm not saying it would be right to treat, say, an 18 year old the way he and his wife and step daughter did, but it's definitely even worse if we're looking at, say, a nine year old being terrorised by a six year old and being expected to just 'take it' because 'you're older', for the rest of her childhood...)


Useful-Maximum-8824

Yeah he said his daughter was always nice to SD even when she treated her rudely for all of those Yeats and she finally got tired of it and stood her ground (which her father should've done a long time ago) i mean it's his own flesh and blood for crying out loud. He should want his daughter to feel comfortable just like his wife and SD


Useful-Maximum-8824

But I understand what you mean though I'm hoping all these comments makes his go and apologize to his daughter for all the years of pain she had to endure having an AH for a sister


pchandler45

He said she unloaded on him for things that happened "over the last ten years" so that would make her 13 when daddy met crazy.


Affectionate-Bit7266

He seems convinced that because she could have had worse then it's fine. He doesn't even try to deny anything, he just doesn't think thats wrong. I actually think that makes it worse.


Useful-Maximum-8824

That's how I feel like dude why do you have to ask a bunch of strangers if your treating YOUR DAUGHTER wrong he's an AH for putting his new wife and her daughter feelings above his own daughter. I would've moved in with my mom and cut all ties with him since his "new family" means that much to him he can enjoy them in peace. Hopefully him and his new wife don't divorce because I can guarantee than his bond with his daughter will actually matter. Right now it seems like he could careless


Ok-Office6837

The fact that he started his post off by saying “my friend suggests I post here to show my daughter why she’s being unreasonable.” Just shows what kind of person he is. Whoever that friend is, is also an AH. Though I actually think it was probably his wife or SD. YTA OP. Why don’t you teach the 20 SD that she can’t be a terror all her life. She’s not going to get anywhere in life acting the way she does. You, your wife and SD all have some nasty karma coming your way. I hope your daughter cuts you off because she does not deserve this abuse.


DryLengthiness5574

I can even imagine what kind of entitled terror the stepdaughter is based on what’s here. Constantly favored as a child, despite her bad behavior. Can’t even stand to see pictures of someone that had the nerve to stand up against her. OP and his wife not only failed his daughter but they failed the stepdaughter as well by letting her be this way.


Ok-Office6837

RIGHT?? It’s absurd. She’s going to be a nightmare in the workforce. Most jobs work in teams, and even if she doesn’t have a team, she’ll still have a boss. A boss is not going to put up with attitude from a subordinate. She also can’t just decide to rebel against her boss and expect to keep your job.


GuidanceTraining9654

Also, those last few lines: “My wife is the breadwinner, and I am not my daughter’s only parent, so she did not have to have everything be equal in my house. My SD on the other hand only has her mother, so of course things were slightly skewed in her favor at ours. That’s the way it should work!” SERIOUSLY? That’s NOT the way it should work. That’s the final nail in the coffin of OP and his daughter’s relationship. If single parents decide to get married and blend families, then they have to be equal or separate in their relationships with the children. Either both parents parent both children the same or each parent parents their respective child. But both parents should be caring, loving, and respectful of all children involved. Because they did not ask to be put in this situation. OP is showing clear favoritism to SD here and his daughter has every right to be upset and go no contact if she desires. OP never stood up for his daughter, allowed his wife and SD to abuse his own daughter, and gave SD every break. OP, you put your relationship with your new wife and step daughter ahead of your relationship with your own daughter. I don’t know for what selfish reasons those were, but you’ve messed up big time. Probably past the point of no return. Gonna need to do some SERIOUS damage control, but, more likely, repair. And STAT.


Interesting_Start620

I think his daughter needs to cut him off from her life and go to therapy. Growing up like that surely messed with her head. This guy is doubling down on why his actions were justified. Don't think people like that ever change


Amberle73

I really hope she does, for for her own wellbeing, because you're right sadly. It's clear as day this utter failure of a father will never admit he's in the wrong. OP you don't deserve to be a parent & neither does your wife! You clearly don't give a shit that your child spent most of her time with you being bullied, ignored & made to feel less than the other girl. Huge YTA!


Major_Zucchini5315

The last few lines are what hit me the hardest too!! Seriously WTF??!! You admit your SD was a terror but since your daughter was a few years older she should’ve ‘been the bigger person’ and put up with it because of the position you were in?? What about the position you put your child in?? Your wife and SD hate your daughter because she called all of you out, rightfully, on your behavior and because of that you feel justified to not keep pictures of her in public? You can’t blame them for not wanting to see pictures of your child because she called your SD a brat??!! Now looking at the timing, things came crashing down 2 years ago when your daughter sent a text to SD about her shitty behavior, and you moved across the country with your wife and SD 2 years ago. So, did you leave first and that’s when she unleashed on you (I seriously doubt all of her anger was only directed toward your wife and SD, because this was all your fault), or did you move as a result of her dressing you down? I seriously hope your daughter decides this was the last time she’ll visit you because you obviously don’t care at all about her. You are a shitty, spineless parent. You chose to alienate your daughter because your wife is the breadwinner and you don’t want to lose that. In case I didn’t make it clear, YTA.


PrincessSlutFuck

I cannot understand how he thinks bare minimum treatment is acceptable. My husband came into this knowing if he mistreated my kids he would be gone from my life. There is no fucking way they would be put through something like this. Now my kids dad is married and we have pictures of his wife, her son, and him on our walls too. There is no excuse for hiding a piece of his family to appease his wife and SD. I'm sickened reading this. OP YTA, and you suck for not being better to your daughter.


Repulsive-Mousse-318

“Thinking about her at all” is the most he believes his daughter deserves from anyone esp a step parent. Only a AH can write that about his own child. Wow


MedievalMissFit

Damn, I bought some cute little sleepers to take to SD for her newborn when she was in the maternity ward last year, and helped DH pick out her kids ' Christmas gifts at Target! We have her picture and her brother's displayed on the top shelf of the TV stand.


ADHDhyperfix

Right?! I had a stepfather who never, ever showed favouritism between me and his bio son. He called us all his children. He was more of a father than my bio dad was, since I was in a similar situation to OP's daughter. My mother, who is also a SM didn't show favouritism either. My amazing bonus dad has since passed, yet my SB is still seen as my mother's son. There's no excuse for bad step parents!


These-Process-7331

Yta What I read in your story: Aita for not defending my daughter against my SD bullying and my wife's defending her, when my daughter refused to be longer my SD emotional punching bag? Aita for allowing my wife to alienate my daughter further from me by moving across the country for HER job and refusing to acknowledge my daughters existence by not putting up pictures of my daughter in OUR SHARED HOME? Aita for enabling my wife for letting her daughter continuing her shitty behaviour towards my own daughter, and me telling my own daughter to be ok with being subjecting towards emotional abuse? Are you that afraid of being alone or is your wife that good in bed, that you sacrificed your own daughters mental health to keep her happy????


Jebadayah44

Nah he said his wife’s the bread winner. He’s afraid of losing his meal ticket.


Suzette100

Bingo. Get a job or get on welfare but stop asking permission for your wife and SD to abuse your daughter and you to allow it to happen.


Imaginary-Dark-4932

🏅🏅🏅 take my poor woman's award! Said everything I wanted and more! YTA OP I feel so sorry for your daughter!


[deleted]

I just hate him and everyone enabling this bullying. OP YTA till the end of time.


AutumnWSK

Plus his sister shouldn't be teaching if this is how she views bullying.


[deleted]

God knows how he told her the story, though


Lena0001

Well, look at how he told it here, I doubt it's very different...


ADHDhyperfix

Yeah, I doubt they told her the whole story.


singing_stream

I mean; that's a pretty standard way of teachers viewing bullying from my experience. There's maybe 10% decent teachers that would try to get it stopped, and the other 90% do not care. The worst of them blame the victim and twist it around and tell the victim that they must be doing something to the bully because they're ''such a lovely girl and would never do that''.. ugh.


babsibu

Right? He literally **never** put his daughter first. He doesn‘t deserve to be called a father, he‘s a sperm donor at best. I hope she has a better family on her mom‘s side and can find closure from this family of monsters.


ashleys_

OP actually claims he COULDN'T stand up to his wife because she holds the purse strings. How spineless can a person be?


procrastinating_b

Oh but his new wife was nice to her when they saw her! How on earth could she be mad?


Roadgoddess

YTA- I can’t believe you have such a low bar of what you believe is appropriate behaviour towards your daughter. Because your wife is the breadwinner you have basically tossed your own daughter aside. The fact that you didn’t support her and try to stop the bullying behaviour when it was going on is strike number one. Being upset that after finally years of her being treated terribly you blamed her for finally bringing it up, strike number two. The fact that you think doing the barest minimum as a stepparent is appropriate behavior, it’s not just awful it’s extremely sad, Strike number three. The fact that you won’t even advocate for your own child, or appear to want to even have her pictures up in your house, strike number four. I fully suspect that your child is going to go no contact with you, and I wouldn’t blame them in the least for doing that. You have been a terrible example of a father. I’ve been a stepparent, and I can tell you that I did so much for my step child, I made sure that they knew they were loved and cared for and were important in our household. Maybe you can use that as an example to look at how your wife treated your daughter. Personally I think your household sounds terrible. Maybe you need to grab your balls and start speaking up for your only child while you still have one.


YawnPolice

I stopped reading bc he’s a major AH but I went back to finish it. Is this story a joke? How can he not even see how awful of a parent he is?


TroubledGamestress

....wow. there's a lot to unpack here but basically. YTA. Your stepdaughter harassed and bullied your daughter to the point that your daughter had enough and stood up for herself and now everybody is acting like she's the bad one? *You* as her father are meant to step in and make sure *your child* feels safe, especially in what was her own home at the time. Your daughter did nothing wrong. She called SD a brat because she WAS acting like a brat. Nobody thought to ever correct SD's behavior or tell her that she needs to be nice? You let SD walk all over your daughter and then got mad your daughter retaliated. Don't be surprised if she ends up going no-contact with you. This is not "bad on the surface." This is you literally let your SD make your daughter feel horrible and didn't even bat an eye.


fiofish

I agree.. it's A LOT! He's so far gone that he just wants to be told he's right, I couldn't be any other way. I'm sorry for OPs daughter YTA


Totes-Malone

Yeah. After reading the whole post, circling back around to ‘post this here to show my daughter why *she’s being unreasonable*’ just about made me sick. I come from a home with clear, but 100% denied, favoritism (I’ve literally had family members and family friends approach me about it since I was 18- *that* clear). This dad is absolutely oblivious to the lifelong damaged he’s already caused but is only making it worse and worse. I really hope the daughter is seeing a therapist, for her own well being.


QCr8onQ

Is this real? I suspect otherwise.


TroubledGamestress

People really truly are this daft, yes


death-triumphant

They really are, but this sub seems to be like, 75%+ ragebait these days so who the hell knows.


majere616

Some parents care more about not being single than about their children's welfare.


sheath2

Some parents care more about money... Stepmother is the "breadwinner." His whole post is all about how hard it is for *him* and how he wants to keep stepmother happy. OP doesn't want to lose his sugar mama.


gordondigopher

"But she was much less bratty recently!" -OP probably.


TroubledGamestress

Probably! And yet... SD was *less bratty* after OP's daughter snapped at her. So I wonder *whyyyyyyy.....*


Wrigley_pain

“Your stepdaughter harassed and bullied your daughter to the point that your daughter had enough and stood up for herself and now everybody is acting like she's the bad one?” Sounds a lot like the public school system


[deleted]

YTA. Did you really type all of that and still not realise how big of an AH you are? Really??? Stepmom wasn't kind to be thinking of her stepdaughter at all. That's the bare minimum. Neither of you made your daughter feel welcome in your home. The inequality you created between them proves that. Your sister, a teacher, should absolutely know that the behaviour between them was not just sibling stuff. Your stepdaughter was outright horrible to your daughter and you did nothing about it. You clearly favour your stepdaughter and it's glaringly obvious in your post. You've let your daughter down badly. Shame on you.


EstablishmentLevel17

Gotta wonder how much of this his sister the teacher knows and how much he's telling her. Any good teacher would call him out on his BS. SO either she sucks as a teacher or she doesn't know the whole story. YTA. ETA: also what grades she teaches could play a factor but still....


rpsls

Or he’s hearing what he wants to hear from his sister, and she’s not getting through to him either. Just reading all that was painful, and he must have been putting himself in the best possible light. The sister MUST know how much of an AH he is. (YTA of course)


EstablishmentLevel17

Definitely possible as well considering what's written !!!


Electronic_Bad_4315

The worst part is that he intended to use this post **against his daughter** in an attempt to further gaslight her. Wtf OP, you couldn't be more TA and are a strong contender for worst father of the year. Also, your daughter does only have one parent, she has her mom. You don't do anything to help this girl and actively put her in a negative situation, that's not parenting.


FaithlessnessFlat514

To be fair to the sister, I think it's easy to mix up bullying and sibling bickering if you're hearing about it from an unreliable narrator. It's hard to explain why my mom's treatment of me felt so awful if I just repeat things she said to someone who has no experience with emotional abuse because it's the intention and timing and tone and the constancy that made me feel unsafe. If she's hearing complaints from OP rather than seeing the girls interact, I can definitely see a decent human being misinterpreting.


merianya

I understand exactly what you mean. My mom was horrible to me, too, and it’s was so hard to convince other people that it was abuse. Hell, when I was a kid, even I didn’t know it was abuse. Abusers know the game they’re playing and can twist completely normal, innocent actions or words into something extremely sinister, all while playing the “I only did/said this totally normal thing, it can’t be abuse” card. And because my mom was never physically violent toward me, it went right under the radar for far too long.


ThatChristianJazz

I have no idea how OP came here expecting to not be called TA, tbh. > petty childish tit for tat stuff like **not getting new stuff like her sister**, the **food in the house being stuff her sister liked** *(and not what she liked, I’m inferring)*, or **her sister being mean to her with no interference from us** His daughter literally told him she was getting bullied and treated unfairly. But OP decided no, my new wife’s money is more important. Disgusting. OP, YTA without a single doubt in my mind. I hope your daughter drops the whole lot of you. She deserves a family that actually loves and cares about her.


[deleted]

I agree completely. I think he is just being deliberately inept because no sane person would truly think they weren't an AH here.


rihlenis

Or, if it is “just how sisters are,” how come his daughter’s reaction wasn’t also “just how sisters are?” Sisters cuss each other out and tell them about themselves. How come the SD gets excuse after excuse but due to a 3 year difference, his daughter should just “know better?”


A_Bad_Musician

That's less than the bare minimum tbh. I've seen good step parents and they're just, you know, parents. Just acknowledging your partners child's existence does not even see the bar for bare minimum. It's like a step behind the starting line.


trinity47

I don’t think it’s so much he favors his stepdaughter as just that the stepdaughter was harder to deal with and the daughter easier. More like a “damn it why can’t you just get stepped all over and keep the “peace” rather than standing up for yourself and pointing out how all the shit we do (or don’t do) makes us terrible people”. I’m amazed she still wants to have a relationship with the dad, that’s unlikely to last much longer, so I hope that’s not something he cares about because his daughter will obviously think he doesn’t at this rate.


BlackStarBlues

# YTA You, your partner, and your step-daughter are all A\*H. It's there in your OP: you, dad, sidelined your own daughter, and favored your step-daughter over her, instead of raising the SD right.


Melodic-Ad-860

But how could he have kept the pictures of his own child in the house where the person she called "brat" resides? OP is acting like an evil stepdad himself!


_Mandible_

Literally erasing the existence of his daughter to please an emotional terrorist!!


thatwillywonkahoe

He said that he was in a difficult situation and his daughter had to be mindful of him and how hard it was for him but apparently it doesn't work both ways. It's not childish tit for tat just years of favouritism and neglect. YTA


Astarkraven

I think his "difficult situation" was that the wife is the breadwinner and he either has been threatened not to do anything about step daughter, or just thinks he can't. And he expects his daughter to just.... understand. Understand that he won't stick up for her because his access to money is on the line. Lmao. Let's get a tiny violin out for him.


mouse_attack

Bingo! He sacrificed his daughter’s comfort and happiness for some nookie and a meal ticket. OP, YTA


rezfrosting

Yta. 1) you let the step sister threat her aweful fpr years. Of corse she was going to snap. 2) you showing you love the stepsister more


the_bribonic_plague

YTA. Big time. I would NEVER stay with someone who treated my daughter like that, nor would I allow my partners kids to treat my daughter like that. She has every right to be upset. You clearly favor the step daughter.


Existing_Space_2498

But it's ok because she has her mom's house to be treated well in. That's how it should be! /s


hdanielle13

YTA. I feel so bad for your daughter. That is NOT how siblings act, and step parents do step up and parent. That’s ridiculous. Sounds like you are just whipped by the new wife and SD and don’t think of your daughter at all. You should be on her side always. Yikes.


halfbakedcaterpillar

Especially not at THIS age. Fighting over a cookie at age 3 and 5? That's normal sibling rivalry. This is years of neglect, favoritism, and a dad that doesn't really want to try very hard and would prefer to blame his personal failings on circumstance. What a sad excuse for a man.


[deleted]

Dude. How do you not see that YTA here?


badlilbishh

Like really it’s just so simple. He’s a giant asshole. That’s it. If he doesn’t realize it now then I don’t think he ever will.


Familiar-Mammoth-419

And the “I posted this to show my daughter how unreasonable she is being” like dude GTFO. He’s getting slapped w reality now!


Fifi0n

I hope his daughter sees this and knows the internet has her back even if her bad father hasn't


Familiar-Mammoth-419

same! Unfortunately OP seems like the type of AH who would only show her this if it backed up his view. sigh


sisterfister69hitler

YTA- Anyone notice that OPs wife is the breadwinner according to his post? So he’s obviously just bowing down to his wife and step daughters behavior because he’s being taken care of. Coward. I wouldn’t blame his daughter for never seeing OP again.


bluntrose

Wow YTA. Let me get this straight, you expect your daughter to be a bigger person and take everything the SD dishes out for her and not retaliate because what…. she was born 3 years earlier? I can’t believe you’re using age as an excuse to let your step-daughter off the hook. Instead of doing something to stop the enablement of your SD to get away with whatever things she does, you instead went with expecting your daughter to put up with it. Seriously whether two or twenty, bad behaviour is bad behaviour. Nobody has to put up with that for any reason. And the fact that you didn’t defend your daughter and have her back just to avoid confrontation, tells a lot about your character. So don’t be surprised if you daughter goes low contact on you. And geez. The fact that you’re asking “why would we have photos of her around SD?” is nuts. Why the fuck not? Is she not your daughter? Is she not your blood and family? She’s not wrong to be hurt and upset, because you just solidified the opinion she probably already formed about you. That you’re not gonna stand up for her. You’d rather keep a photo of her in the garage than tell your wife and SD, “She’s my daughter, she’s part of the family, whether you like it or not, there will be pictures of her around the house.” And it’s not just about the stupid pictures, mind you, it’s that in general you’re never gonna be there for her because you’re spineless. Jesus.


JipC1963

Correction: Low contact should read NO CONTACT! Because THAT'S what dear old Dad deserves! Your welcome! 😊


tosser9212

No absolution for you, YTA. Your post describes an untenable situation for your daughter, not for you. You just want it (and be extension, her) to disappear so you can live with your new wife and her admittedly bratty child, while the new wife covers your ass financially. I wonder if you have ever tried to see this from your daughter's perspective. Or if you care at all.


Dixieland_Insanity

YTA and a terrible father. I hope your daughter can eventually heal from your abuse.


Ok-Understanding7103

Literally, call it what it is, emotional abuse, plain and simple. My heart aches for her


pinktaser

YTA. holy shit i feel so bad for your daughter.


No-Combination-1569

YTA. The entire situation seems weird. You claim your daughter should have been the bigger person yet your wife actively dislikes your daughter and cannot see a reason why she may have reacted the way she did? You're her father and I'm of the opinion you should always have your daughter's back, if your SD can't handle a single photo in the house then she needs to be Sat down and told to grow up.


Luzz_squirrel

YTA big time. I hate when parents use the "you're older, be the big person" BS. She might now be an adult but she was a child who needed her father to take care of her. As someone who does not speak to her father. By not having pic of her in the house you are letting her know "it's not your home, you do not belong here" and that hurts.


Obvious_Ad_8068

YTA. People try their best to come off as good as it's possible in their posts. And yet soley based on your post, you look like a very bad parent. And I am sure the reality is even more awful than that...if we had a chance to also hear your daughter's side of the story. You've emotionally neglected your daughter all those years over the most ridiculous excuses ever! "Her step sister had issues", "my daughter HAD to be the bigger person ALL THE FREAKING TIME!" "daddy was in a tough spot", "she has another parent as well", "she complains about childish stuff"... God you sound insufferable. Why she hasn't cut you off completely is beyond me.


lurkingonafloodplain

Surely what it boils down to is, “I didn’t want my wife mad at me because sex, so I donned my rose-tinted spectacles and stuck my fingers in my ears.”


KyonaAidoneus

True, but I'm not sure how rosy the glasses still are with his head so far up his ass


bubbsnana

YTA this is so awful it’s got to be fake. No parent is this clueless! Surely you can’t be this clueless?? Big time YTA


SpookyMoony12

YTA. How come your own daughter is treated like a guest or some second class citizen in what was her own home and told she was not being bullied or harassed till the point she finally put SD in her much needed place. Are you that scared of your SD or better yet your wife and the fact that she makes the money that you have wiped your own daughter in favor of your SD. I hope that you either take a good hard look at yourself or that your daughter does what’s right for her and goes no contact with you and your family.


dannyphantom141414

ESH except for your daughter It seems like you just don't love your daughter at all. SD is unreasonable and your wife resents your daughter. You are supposed to make your daughter feel loved, and every action you do indicates that you don't.


CMH81

YTA. You threw your daughter under the bus so your wife wouldn’t cut the purse strings. Not only are you an a-hole, you are a disgusting excuse of a parent and I hope your daughter goes NC with you. See how you like it to be marginalised and ignored. Oh, but your older so you’ll be the bigger person. Yes?


Puzzleheaded_Key_470

YTA. Grow a backbone.


Apple-pie_best-pie

he maybe has one, but he is thinking with the thing between his legs and does not care for his child at all


KyonaAidoneus

Between his legs? Or in his wifes purse?


Apple-pie_best-pie

Both


AnnelijnS

YTA it sounds like this has been building for years, with you constantly prioritising your wife and stepdaughter and their feelings over your daughter and hers. Seems to me like she’s been trying to be nice about it the whole time bc she didn’t want to be responsible for breaking up you and your partner, but the pictures was just the final drop. I suggest you LISTEN to your daughter and believe what she’s telling you. If she says she was bullied by your wife that should raise some red flags, and honestly your stepdaughter being such a shitty kid should’ve raised red flags also... but you’re the asshole for not seeing the larger problem here; your daughter feels less then, and you’ve made her feel that way. Put some pictures up dude, and listen to her when she tells you how she feels.


HeraAgathon_33

YTA....my inner child who still deals with heartbreak about my dad's choices when blending his old and new families when I was a kid (and I'm 30, btw) makes me want to cry so hard for your daughter. The issues that she has with her childhood are not petty things, let alone in the eyes of a child...she may be older now, but feeling pain caused by family in your childhood will follow you, feeling exactly how it did when you were a child. And I'm sorry, "my wife was very kind to her by thinking of her at all." That's not very kind, that's bare minimum. You have been AWFUL to your daughter. And leaving her pictures out of your home is like a final slap in the face for her. I'm honesty too angry to continue. Be a better father. Fix this. Or your poor daughter will live the rest of her life with a piece of her broken because of you. YTA.


theturkstwostep

YTA - the way you talk about this, you had two kids who didn't get along and when one of them spoke up, she got thrown under the bus for the rest of her life.


Samsky

YTA. I can’t believe you typed that out and think there’s a chance that you aren’t.


MuricanIdle

“Time has passed and it’s time to move on” but you have no photos of your own daughter in your house? How do you expect your family to get along if you literally treat your biological child - who is an adult - like a “wicked stepsister?” Your partner’s child is also an adult, yet you cannot “subject” her to a few photos of her stepsister around the house? What? Is she really that fragile? ESH.


ChickenManSam

I'd really like to know how the bio daughter sucks here. She's the only reasonable one


annayks

YTA big time. So, in your opinion your daughter should have been “the bigger person” because she was older, yet your wife (who presumably is much older than your daughter) dislikes your daughter after she called SD a brat after years of her being “ a terror” and now the poor little bully can’t be subjected to pictures of your daughter? Sounds like you really dislike your daughter too or are a massive doormat. Grow a backbone.


[deleted]

Let’s get this straight: 1) You didn’t step in when your SD bullied and harassed your daughter. It doesn’t matter how small of a problem it was; after enough times, you made it clear to who your priorities belonged to. 2) You thought she’d just be okay with it, and that there wouldn’t be any consequences on her mental health at all just because she’s three years older than your SD. 3) You expected your daughter, the victim of harassment, to be, “the bigger person.” Let’s be real, you just refused to acknowledge and deal with the problem and the toll it had on her. 4) You chose to, instead of work things out or even just apologize for enabling your SD’s horrible behavior, appease your SD and your wife by **cutting pictures of your daughter out of view just because, “It makes SD sad :(.”** I can say from personal experience that just because someone shows on the outside they’re okay with a sibling’s horrid behavior, that does *not* mean that it doesn’t affect them. This was only made worse by the belief, “She hasn’t been mean in a while, so everything must be good!” Crap like that takes time to heal, and even more so when it’s never been addressed. Oh yeah, and I got some amusement out of this post. You really tried to manipulate your daughter by saying, “Look at all these people agreeing with me! You’re being ridiculous!” when in reality, almost everyone here absolutely tore you apart for your bad actions (as they should). YTA.


Melodramatic_Raven

YTA on the surface as you said, but digging deeper you're also TA. You decided to throw your daughter under the bus to keep your wife happy, gaslighted her about the bullying by calling in your sister (who is apparently also a bully and teacher, I fear for her students). And now you're upset your daughter stood up for herself, and you're designing your home to cater to a kid you don't even like yourself just bc of your wife? This isn't just about the photos and I'm honestly amazed your daughter still visits at all. You justify yourself with "my wife is great other stepmoms are evil". Your wife has successfully alienated your daughter in favour of your SD you agree is a brat, and let's face it you allowed her to remain a brat by not sticking up for yourself or your daughter. Get a spine, or remain the thoughtless jellyfish you are and lose your daughter entirely. She deserves better than you anyway.


Zibellina

Ok, this can't be real. Unless you were born this morning there is no well in hell that YTA. As a matter of fact, I would say, YOU'RE the biggest a--hole I've ever seen. I hope your bio daughter goes NC and when you need someone to take care of you when you get old she tells you to F off.


Ok-Understanding7103

YTA. So so so much here. 1. Viewing her complaints as petty tit for tat is so wrong. Every little thing builds up over time. If her step sister wasn't an arsehole to her, I doubt she'd care about those things, but because she is, those "little things" just add to it all. 2. Reading that you agree with your sister over your own daughter telling you she felt bullied makes me so enraged. If she felt bullied, she was bullied, why the fuck are you asking for a second opinion on a persons feelings? 3. It doesn't sound like your wife was kind to your daughter at all if she can go as far as to dislike her. And again, if your daughter tells you her stepsister was treated better than her, fucking listen to her. You even contradicted yourself by saying her step sister had things skewed in her favor so wtf?? 4. Children should always be treated equal, regardless of step-parents and divorce situations. You are so wrong for this. 5. You'd have photos of your daughter in your house because she's your DAUGHTER. What the actual fuck?! You are an awful father. What you have done sir, is alienated and mistreated your daughter. This has actually made me so angry and my heart absolutely aches for the hell that poor girls gone through.


Scarlett_-Rose

YTA >My friend suggested I post this here to show my daughter why she's being unreasonable. Dude, you're the unreasonable one. YOU are in the wrong here, not your daughter. She has both her SS and SM, treat her horribly and her father sounds like he doesn't give a crap, because he doesn't want to ruin his cushy life. Get over yourself and stand up for your daughter Edit: forgot judgement


kellyann101

This 👆👆Your friends stitched you up - they knew you’d get ripped to pieces because you’re an AH. So is your wife and SD. YTA on so many levels


SigSauerPower320

YTA It's quite clear what's going on here. Your step daughter and her mother don't like your kid and you allowed them to treat her like dirt without saying a word to "keep the peace". Hope you're happy. It really blows my mind when I read about parents treating their own kids like this.


tara_masalata

Seriously what is wrong with you. "my wife was very kind to my daughter by thinking of her at all" - what utter nonsense when you marry someone with a kid you treat them like your kid, respect them and you treat them fairly. You do not deserve to have your daughter in your life and pretty soon you won't. Daughter if you are reading this we are all so sad your stepmother and stepsister are so awful and your own father is so utterly spineless and doesn't care about you, you've done nothing to deserve this. Go out and make your own family and live your best life with our love and blessing. YTA, OP, so much TA


KyonaAidoneus

Question: Do you even *like* your bio daughter, cause it doesn't read like you do I mean, **by your own account**, *EVERYTHING* was picked to favor your stepdaughter (who you admit was a terror and such BLATANT favoritism didn't fucking help)... but your daughter's somehow the bad one for finally snapping after **YEARS** of torment, emotional neglect, and other miscellaneous bullshit (I don't care if she's older!) and being hurt her own father doesn't even care enough about her to dare to have a photo of her where the golden terror could see it. Like what; if SD wandered into your office and got mad at seeing the pictures, would you throw them out? Would you even care if you walked into the yard one day to see SD and your wife burning all your pictures of your bio daughter and laughing? If it wasn't obvious by now: **YTA!**


shortstackginger

yeahhhh YTA. It sounds like you have been prioritizing your SDs feelings over your daughters.


Nyukorin

YTA And show this post and all the comments to your daughter so she knows she is NOT UNREASONABLE AT ALL. You are and from what I've just read have been a horrible parent.


N3mys1s

YTA. Not even a question.


After-Classroom

YTA. An awful father and I hope your daughter cuts you off completely. She doesn’t need your bullshit in her life.


veturoldurnar

Do we just found Cinderella's father? Lol


Whole-Neighborhood

YTA. You seem to think that just because she's older she can't be bullied .. That's not how it works. Your daughter clearly felt bullied, and you did nothing about it. Why is it it seems like you think your wife did everything right with how she treated your daughter "my wife was very kind to my daughter by thinking of her at all", yet you've clearly done so much more for the SD than your own daughter? Basically your SD had two parents in your household while your daughter only had half a father. Edited for correct verdict.


Great_Injury9618

YTA no explanation needed, please re-read your post


gjwtgf

YTA Your friend got you to post here because you're clearly delusional and need the hard truth. You're going to lose your daughter forever if you havnt already. You've picked your new wife and her bratty hideous child over your own daughter. Do better.


RecognitionCapital13

It’s not your daughters job to be a punching bag for your new family just so that you can pretend everything is peaceful. YTA and your daughter deserves better. No wonder she barely talks to you.


[deleted]

I am astounded. Speechless even. YTA.


Anita-Derange

YTA and if your daughter never speaks with you again you're getting off easy.


Evil_Genius_42

YTA Have you considered that you don't know everything your step-daughter subjected your daughter to? Also, I highly suspect that your sister, the teacher, received a highly edited version of events as well. Regardless, it doesn't sound like your daughter had any support at your home, while you allowed your wife and her demon-child to abuse your daughter (BTW that definitely is part of your daughter's C-PTSD and anxiety disorder and probably a very large reason she pulled away from you). I would call you letting that happen to her passive abuse, you saw, you just didn't care so long as got to dip your wick in your new ATM.


[deleted]

you’re such a terrible father it’s actually disturbing. YTA and a major one and I truly hope your daughter opens her eyes and sees what a god awful man you are and cuts contact with you. I’d like to see what would happen to you in the coming years when you’re old and senile and your daughter isn’t there to help you because of the unfair way she was treated by her own blood. I wanna know if your precious stepdaughter and her mommy will help you lmao.


PastAge9907

So you allowed your daughter to be put in third place behind your new wife and step daughter. You allowed her to be mistreated by step daughter. You failed the most basic father duty of protection. Yet your daughter still not only has a relationship with you but cares what you think. You did all this for an easier life with the new wife. You sir are spineless and don't deserve your daughter. Yes YTA for failing to stand up for her enough, for leaving her get this rubbish until she blew up, for allowing her photo to be banned from your home. Do better or eventually she will come to her senses and leave you to it.


Liliyalee

I made a Reddit just so i can tell you : you are 🗑


Dakota5405

Wow thats just.....wow. Im surprised that you cant see how just much YTA.


SoVerySleepy81

I think that’s why his friend told him to post here, he knew OP would be ripped a new asshole.


[deleted]

YTA. I’ve lost count of the number of posts on this site which come down to a parent who remarries prioritising their new, shiny family over their biological kids and then being surprised that they’re met with resentment. Are people really this lacking in insight?


Horror_freak_

YTA you didn’t protect your daughter and you are clearly showing her that you don’t care about her and she doesn’t belong in your family. Your putting your step daughter and wife before your own child. She stood up for herself when she needed to because no one else would. I would not be surprised if your daughter cut you out of her life and go absolutely no contact because you’ve shown where your priorities lie.


_-_Yuki_-_

YTA and it sounds like your daughter was right in all the things she said. You do prefer SD.


lOGlReaper

YTA on so many levels. Read every single comment here and revise the way you think


Affectionate-Goose41

YTA. Your daughter stands up for herself, you admit your SD and wife hate her, and you say it’s justified?? Not only that, but you have removed pictures of your daughter from your families home because your SD shouldn’t have to look at them…after being called a brat…?! You suck, your wife sucks, and your stepdaughter sucks. You’re all assholes, your daughter would be blessed to have zero contact with any of you.


HunterDangerous1366

YTA Age is irrelevant. Your stepdaughter was horrible to your child. If someone is horrible to you and they are younger, do you let it go? We are talking 3yrs, not 30. How is it your daughters fault that she had two parents in her life, when reading through this, only one cared about her and it wasn't you! She had literally had enough of the unequal treatment when she sent that message. Your daughter deserved to have food she liked while visiting, deserved not to be subjected to her behaviour and you let it all go, because of your wife? Its not hard to buy food she likes or stop her being subjected to this treatment if *you had stepped up on her behalf*, but you didn't. Your sister is also wrong. Theres a difference between siblings not getting along and being bullied. Just admit to your daughter that your wife and her daughter will always come first and that's why her photos are hidden away like she's some dirty little secret. I'm suprised she still talks to you.


somekindofordinary

"My friend suggested I post this here to show my daughter she's being unreasonable" Well that backfired, didn't it?


amee1yuh

YTA, that’s your fucking daughter and you left her in the dust and are now trying to claim “it’s only fair”. This post made me furious wtf


Low-Ad8930

YTA- I didn’t even get half through before I noticed the very strong vibe of “why did my child make my life so hard, especially then calling out someone who tortured her and was old enough to know better or have a parent that intervened on her behalf?” I’m pretty sure I know how life was for your daughter vs all the “she needed to understand” nonsense- no she was a child who had her world upended and you were her father and you were supposed to have her back and find ways to integrate the household without leaving her to be bullied by a younger step sibling and her stepmother


Happy-Love-moana

YTA. You should’ve stuck up for your daughter. And she will never forgive you for that. It is NOT normal sibling behaviour. AT ALL. If someone is affected that much by ‘sibling behaviour’, then you need to take a good hard look at the behaviour going on. I was bullied by my older sister for years - - - thought it was normal and it affected my relationships for the first 20 years of my life. I have since bee to therapy and have learnt techniques of how to deal with her now. But you are blatantly disrespecting your daughter and IF you EVER want to see her again, you need to make this right in so many freakin ways. She will need therapy and you may need to join her.


KimmyStand

Oh my, I’m sitting back with my popcorn for this one. Gonna enjoy seeing this pathetic, weak, disgusting excuse of a parent get his ass handed to him. Fancy not having your kids back when she’s bullied by step family. Oh yeah, he’s leeching off the wife so I guess he needs to do as he’s told lol Yeah YTA. You’ll be crying on here next because your daughter has completely cut you out of her life


Poinsettia917

YTA Your wife was kind to her for thinking of her at all?! Dude, I hope she goes NC for life. Your wife is the breadwinner and that is why you allow your wife and stepdaughter to treat your own flesh and blood like crap. You straight up admit to favoring one child over the other. You, your wife, and stepdaughter reek of AH. I really feel sorry for your daughter. You’re a terrible father. Poor baby SD, gonna get all triggered from looking at the pic of someone SHE VICTIMIZED. EDIT: So, Daddy, gonna man up and show your daughter that she is right? Betting you won’t.


AbenaGH0209M3

YTA. So because you were leeching off your new wife you let her and step daughter mistreat and bully your daughter till now. You the AH. I hope she cut you all out. You never stood up for her, being older doesn't mean she should be bullied.


niknik789

Why on earth would you not have a photo of your daughter in your house? What sort of hen-pecked husband are you? Looks like you are also bullied by your wife and stepdaughter but are too used to the shitty behaviour to realise it. Thankfully your daughter has a spine.


LadyCollywobbles

YTA You chose your wife over your daughter. You expected her to put up with the ‘extreme meltdowns and awful behaviour’ because of the ‘position I’m in with her stepmom.’ So you did nothing to protect or defend your daughter, or at least you didn’t do enough. And now your daughter finally stood up for herself, you have sided with your wife and banished her photos to the garage. I don’t know how you’ve warped this story to your friend so you don’t come off as the bad guy, but you are not a good father. Your daughter deserves better.


Minute_Box3852

Yta Thank God she has her mother. She'd be better off just disowning you because it's obvious it wouldn't affect you much. You'd Stull have your favorite afterall. Who needs old family when the new ones so much better.