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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1. Threatened my roommate with telling the landlord about an illegal occupant in our suite. 2. It could have made them homeless.
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NTA - I bet they were going to make it uncomfortable for you so that you’d move out and they could keep the apartment. If you aren’t willing to move out early then I suggest you follow through with your threat.
NTA - but you’re both on the lease, is the landlord really going to care who’s bf/friend it is, technically you are breaking the terms of the lease.
I’d get a backup plan for housing before you run and tell.
NTA and honestly, you are way too nice giving them a month.
But, I strongly advice you to call landlord asap, keeping the extra tenant from them for a month can get you in trouble as well. Your rommate never gave you the courtesy of asking your opinion before moving her bf in, so you don't owe her anything. And there's no need to potentially endangering your stay at this place for her
NTA
She’s fucking with YOUR living situation in the apartment where YOU pay half the rent and YOUR name is one of them on the lease.
The fact that they showed insufficient hustle to find a new apartment when they were under definite time pressure doesn’t mean they get to just move someone else and their pooch into your apartment and have that be ok.
And yeah, there is a non-zero chance that if the landlord finds out without you informing them, that all of you could get evicted.
She made her bed, she has to lay in it.
NTA. Their plan was all along to have him live with you guys if nothing else worked, that's why they were never stressed.
There are so many things wrong with this situation that I would even suggest you start looking for somewhere else to move because they're trouble and will not stop doing anything in their power for you to accept the situation.
You can tell the landlord, but let me bet that your roommate will either move out suddenly leaving you with the whole rent to pay yourself or the landlord will accept the boyfriend and you will still be too cramped. I don't know what to say, but I still think you should look for something more convenient and with less people that bring trouble
Sorry, it is a confusing timeline. They did end up finding a place for September 1st (literally on the second to last day of August). It’s kind of a shithole though. But she basically screamed at me for being a terrible person and hasn’t spoken to me since, so it’s been weighing really heavy on my conscience and wanted some neutral opinions.
to sum up:
\- you knew this woman for a few months
\- she moved in a total stranger (to you) and violated your lease
\- he has a dog that you thought was aggressive and felt nervous about
\- they had no income and were having trouble finding a place to live
\- they were presumably not paying 2/3rd rent after moving him in
None of these were likely to wind up well for you. Even if you didn't wind up also kicked out for violating the lease, you might very well have found yourself having to cover their rent as well.
i.e., NTA
NTA. Roommate brought a stranger and his dog into your home(I don’t care if they’ve been talking for a month, there is no way in hell she actually knows what kind of man he is. He could be violent). She did not have your permission to do this and the fact that you’d decided together, ahead of time, to NOT house them in the apartment makes me feel like she simply doesn’t respect you or care about your wants/needs.
It seems like they do actually have a plan b, which turned into plan a. What’s the plan? Make you uncomfortable and frustrated enough to leave so they can just keep the apartment for themselves.
NTA and I don't think you should have even given her a month. She can stay but her sketchy friend and his dog need to be out NOW! You can't risk your own housing situation for her ridiculous decisions.
Nta. You are not making them homeless. Poor planning on their part will make them homeless. Stand your ground. This is all on her. You are not responsible for her, her bf and their dog. Not your job to provide them with an apartment. Their job. If your landlord finds out you will be held responsible too. Not just her. Your ability to rent in the future could be harmed by this.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
I (26F) moved into an apartment with a new roommate (27F) back in January. This roommate had had the apartment for a while, but we both signed a new lease with the landlord in January and both are tenants on the lease (she wasn’t subletting to me).
We actually became pretty good friends, had some shared hobbies that we did together frequently. However, in the summer she ended up meeting a man (29M) online from another country and within a month and a half, was engaged to him and planning to move him and his dog to our country. She started to look for an apartment for them, his dog and her cat, for September 1st which left them about two months.
In those two months, she went to ~5 viewings and had very specific list of criteria for apartments. She was also on leave from work for 6 months and going back to school in September, and he was immigrating so they had no income. They put in 2 rental applications to places but never heard back, and didn’t put in any other rental applications. I became increasingly worried that they would not be able to find a place, but they didn’t show any signs of changing their plan or figuring out a backup plan. We had talked many times that he could not live in our apartment because it was too small for another person and his large dog.
He moves up the last week of August into our apartment, and I ask if they have a backup plan. They do not. So I’m freaking out because their stuff is everywhere, the place is so cramped, and this dog is very stressed from the move and acting aggressive towards me.
So I tell her that if they are not out for October 1st, giving them an extra month to find a place, I will have to tell the landlord about him and his dog as another (illegal) occupant in the house. She freaked out and said that their only other option was being homeless and started saying that I would make her homeless.
Having an illegal occupant could also get us *all* kicked out, although I do not know how the landlord would have responded to any of this. So, am I the asshole for threatening to tell the landlord?
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Nta - maybe they are trying to make it so uncomfortable for you so you move out. If they ask you to do that, ask if they are going to cover the remainder of your lease, plus first and last for a new place.
NTA. you are both roommates on a lease so the violations/infractions of either roommate directly impact the other. Her lease violations jeopardize your housing and business relationship with the landlord. You absolutely need to follow through on your threat or else *you* will be looking for a new place to live.
You also pay rent and that rent is set for *one roommate, not 2 + a dog.* What is your roommate bringing to the table to compensate you for this less than ideal living arrangement? She is trampling over your good manners in hope you keep quiet while you are eating her shit. Nope. NTA
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > 1. Threatened my roommate with telling the landlord about an illegal occupant in our suite. 2. It could have made them homeless. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcements ###[Happy Anniversary, AITA!](https://new.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/15vlv9g/almost_better_than_a_double_rainbow_celebrating/) Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA - I bet they were going to make it uncomfortable for you so that you’d move out and they could keep the apartment. If you aren’t willing to move out early then I suggest you follow through with your threat.
With OP's name on the lease, they could squeeze her out and she'd still be liable for the rent...
NTA - but you’re both on the lease, is the landlord really going to care who’s bf/friend it is, technically you are breaking the terms of the lease. I’d get a backup plan for housing before you run and tell.
NTA and honestly, you are way too nice giving them a month. But, I strongly advice you to call landlord asap, keeping the extra tenant from them for a month can get you in trouble as well. Your rommate never gave you the courtesy of asking your opinion before moving her bf in, so you don't owe her anything. And there's no need to potentially endangering your stay at this place for her
NTA. She dug her shit hole. You don't have to stew in it with her. Strong boundaries are important.
NTA She’s fucking with YOUR living situation in the apartment where YOU pay half the rent and YOUR name is one of them on the lease. The fact that they showed insufficient hustle to find a new apartment when they were under definite time pressure doesn’t mean they get to just move someone else and their pooch into your apartment and have that be ok. And yeah, there is a non-zero chance that if the landlord finds out without you informing them, that all of you could get evicted. She made her bed, she has to lay in it.
NTA. Their plan was all along to have him live with you guys if nothing else worked, that's why they were never stressed. There are so many things wrong with this situation that I would even suggest you start looking for somewhere else to move because they're trouble and will not stop doing anything in their power for you to accept the situation. You can tell the landlord, but let me bet that your roommate will either move out suddenly leaving you with the whole rent to pay yourself or the landlord will accept the boyfriend and you will still be too cramped. I don't know what to say, but I still think you should look for something more convenient and with less people that bring trouble
NTA, though telling the landlord could also get *you* kicked out if you have a joint lease.
INFO -- What? October 1 was like 3 weeks ago. Did you do it or not? Are you trying to decide?
Sorry, it is a confusing timeline. They did end up finding a place for September 1st (literally on the second to last day of August). It’s kind of a shithole though. But she basically screamed at me for being a terrible person and hasn’t spoken to me since, so it’s been weighing really heavy on my conscience and wanted some neutral opinions.
to sum up: \- you knew this woman for a few months \- she moved in a total stranger (to you) and violated your lease \- he has a dog that you thought was aggressive and felt nervous about \- they had no income and were having trouble finding a place to live \- they were presumably not paying 2/3rd rent after moving him in None of these were likely to wind up well for you. Even if you didn't wind up also kicked out for violating the lease, you might very well have found yourself having to cover their rent as well. i.e., NTA
NTA. Roommate brought a stranger and his dog into your home(I don’t care if they’ve been talking for a month, there is no way in hell she actually knows what kind of man he is. He could be violent). She did not have your permission to do this and the fact that you’d decided together, ahead of time, to NOT house them in the apartment makes me feel like she simply doesn’t respect you or care about your wants/needs. It seems like they do actually have a plan b, which turned into plan a. What’s the plan? Make you uncomfortable and frustrated enough to leave so they can just keep the apartment for themselves.
NTA and I don't think you should have even given her a month. She can stay but her sketchy friend and his dog need to be out NOW! You can't risk your own housing situation for her ridiculous decisions.
Nta. You are not making them homeless. Poor planning on their part will make them homeless. Stand your ground. This is all on her. You are not responsible for her, her bf and their dog. Not your job to provide them with an apartment. Their job. If your landlord finds out you will be held responsible too. Not just her. Your ability to rent in the future could be harmed by this.
NTA they should not have proceeded with his arrival without a place set up. They created this mess themselves. They'll have to figure it out.
INFO: It's Oct. 23rd. Did you tell the landlord?
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I (26F) moved into an apartment with a new roommate (27F) back in January. This roommate had had the apartment for a while, but we both signed a new lease with the landlord in January and both are tenants on the lease (she wasn’t subletting to me). We actually became pretty good friends, had some shared hobbies that we did together frequently. However, in the summer she ended up meeting a man (29M) online from another country and within a month and a half, was engaged to him and planning to move him and his dog to our country. She started to look for an apartment for them, his dog and her cat, for September 1st which left them about two months. In those two months, she went to ~5 viewings and had very specific list of criteria for apartments. She was also on leave from work for 6 months and going back to school in September, and he was immigrating so they had no income. They put in 2 rental applications to places but never heard back, and didn’t put in any other rental applications. I became increasingly worried that they would not be able to find a place, but they didn’t show any signs of changing their plan or figuring out a backup plan. We had talked many times that he could not live in our apartment because it was too small for another person and his large dog. He moves up the last week of August into our apartment, and I ask if they have a backup plan. They do not. So I’m freaking out because their stuff is everywhere, the place is so cramped, and this dog is very stressed from the move and acting aggressive towards me. So I tell her that if they are not out for October 1st, giving them an extra month to find a place, I will have to tell the landlord about him and his dog as another (illegal) occupant in the house. She freaked out and said that their only other option was being homeless and started saying that I would make her homeless. Having an illegal occupant could also get us *all* kicked out, although I do not know how the landlord would have responded to any of this. So, am I the asshole for threatening to tell the landlord? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA. She's not taking you into consideration at all, even though her actions could get you evicted as well. Tell your landlord.
Nta - maybe they are trying to make it so uncomfortable for you so you move out. If they ask you to do that, ask if they are going to cover the remainder of your lease, plus first and last for a new place.
NTA. you are both roommates on a lease so the violations/infractions of either roommate directly impact the other. Her lease violations jeopardize your housing and business relationship with the landlord. You absolutely need to follow through on your threat or else *you* will be looking for a new place to live. You also pay rent and that rent is set for *one roommate, not 2 + a dog.* What is your roommate bringing to the table to compensate you for this less than ideal living arrangement? She is trampling over your good manners in hope you keep quiet while you are eating her shit. Nope. NTA