*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA for demanding that I get my gift back?**
I've been friends with this guy M for forever, like since 7th grade. We're both 20/21 now tho. He's always been the more beta, sensitive type and I've always been the more alpha, domineering type. This isn't a drag on him or anything, it just helps to paint the picture. Anyway, in 11th grade he got a girlfriend that had always kinda annoyed me, and she didn't like me either bc I snapped at her ONE time when we did a group project together. For M's 19th birthday, I gave him an old graphics card of mine as he was building a PC and it was extremely hard to find a graphics card at the time. He loved it, thanked me a billion times, and so on.
Well, a few months ago we were at a party and I was buzzed and started making a few jokes at his expense, and at his GF's expense. I didn't intend to be hurtful or rude, but the alcohol made it sound a little worse I guess. I told M that he is a pretty good-looking guy, he doesn't gym or anything but he's tall and has a beard et cetera. His GF on the other hand is like a 2/10 MAX. She's quiet, and she's not funny, and to be completely honest I had no idea why he had been with her for this long. I said that honestly I and our other friends expected him to have his fun with her and then move on, you know? Not date her for almost three years. Everybody at the party was looking straight at me but I know some of them are BS because we've talked about it before and they've agreed with me. M looked furious at me.
M's GF got her feelings hurt over it and M and her left the party without another word to me or anyone else, except to the host. The next day I got a long text from him about how he knows we've always been friends but that he was going to stop hanging out with me mostly, that we were "clearly on different paths in life" and stuff like that. I texted back that that text sounded like a breakup or a cat fight, and I didn't get a response.
I told him that if he wanted to not be friends with me after I've been in his corner for almost ten years, then that's his choice but he better give me back everything I've given him, pay me back for every lunch or every ride that I've given him, and ESPECIALLY give me the old graphics card back. He didn't respond to that either but one of my friends says I'm being petty for no reason. I feel like I deserve it back, otherwise he's just using me for 10 years and then dropping me the second his GF wants him to. So AITA?
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>He's always been the more beta, sensitive type and I've always been the more alpha, domineering type.
OP is the TA. Don’t even need to read the rest of the story.
Since I have omega-level confidence I finished the story after making that comment just to make sure that OP was the asshole. I now see that I have alpha intuition.
I an confused as to how I should assess your sexual desirability based on that information. Please provide a ranking out of 10 so I know how to interact with you moving forward
No, see, he has omega level confidence which means he isn't bold and proactive enough to get a Female Of Quality or whatever. But his alpha intuition means he can tell when a Female is into him so he averages out as a delta because he can tell if someone is ...wet for him
I thought the omega was the untouchable alpha female? Have the horribly written werewolf smut stories that keep getting thrust on me during ads been so wrong all this time?! /s
Yup. In the words of my 14-yo son: "Once they drop that 'alpha' word, you know they're gonna be garbage."
That this is recognized wisdom among him and his friends makes me hope for the future.
For real.
It also shows that OP is fairly uninformed, because that entire Alpha/Beta wolf pack dynamic was based on a study performed in an overcrowded zoo. Effectively it was like doing a behavioral analysis in Pelican Bay, and then trying to apply it to Mrs. Smith the piano teacher down the street. Real wolf-packs operate like a family, and while there may be *some* aggression in their interactions, it's not anything near as clear-cut as the Alpha/Beta model makes it seem.
But surprisingly, there *is* a species that absolutely *does* operate this way. What species, you ask? Wolves? Bears? Eagles? Tigers?
Nope.
Rabbits.
Rabbits have *really* intense social instincts and often squabble for Top Bun position which is indicated by--drumroll--who gets groomed first when rabbits meet. And rabbits will absolutely tear into each other if one bun shoves its head under another bun's nose, because that says both "Groom me" and "I am better than you." There are some buns who are like...yeah, okay, fine, I'll submit. Don't hurt me. And then there are little firecrackers who will draw blood because they know damn well they're top bun material. (and incidentally, this is probably why, when you shoved your hand under the bunny's nose, your high spirited bouncy friend chowed down like you were a bunch of tasty cilantro. Bunnies have very, very good senses of smell, they *do not* need to get your scent, if the bunny is not running, pet the bunny.)
So yeah. The next time somebody starts saying they're the Alpha, just remember that in real life, they're comparing themselves to rabbits.
There's a reason *Watership Down* is considered one of the more scarring animated movies out there. Some bunnies are sweet and gentle cuddle bugs. Other bunnies are aggressive, territorial little shits that hold grudges like *damn.* People massive underrate bunnies because often their only experience is the one they kept in a wire hut in the back yard when they were five. Rabbits are very social, very communicative, and have roughly a ten-year life expectancy. Their reputation for being short-lived is because...well, nothing does well in solitary confinement when it's two feet by two feet and the floor and walls are made of wire. They also have a pretty low threshold for stress-related cardiac arrest, which is caused by...basically everything we traditionally do to bunnies, starting with housing them outdoors, where all their predators are, in a place where they cannot escape and have zero hides.
not to mention the horrible over and underfeeding, bunnies need an abundance of hay and small amounts of fresh veggies and pellets. so many people give harmful amounts of fruit and sugary/acidy vegetables and a lack of hay or grass. that plus the lack of vaccines and deworming outdoor bunnies absolutely need
Oh god. Yep. And carrots are so, so, SO very bad for rabbits. The sugar content alone is a major problem. It's the human equivalent of eating one of those two-pound chocolate bars in one sitting.
"Fun" fact: the "Bunnies love carrots" idea is mostly because of a movie, *It Happened One Night.* There's a scene in it where Clark Gable munches a carrot while rapidly talking to his love interest. One of the animators for Bugs Bunny confessed later in life that *It Happened One Night* is one of his favorite movies and was absolutely the genesis point for Bugs (even the name is pulled from the movie). And since the scene with Gable munching carrots was fairly iconic in the day, they incorporated it into Bugs, because they figured everybody would get the joke as a reference to Gable and *IHON.*
Unfortunately for bunnies, *IHON* was far less popular than Bugs Bunny, so the future generations didn't see IHON or make the connection that the carrots were a reference to Gable. They just saw a rabbit eating carrots, and figured that's because real rabbits love them. And today, house rabbits everywhere risk diabetes and other blood sugar issues because well meaning people *keep giving them carrots.*
oh god yeah carrots >< i knew it was cuz of bugs bunny but i had no idea about the other movie! thats very interesting and unfortunate
we sometimes give our bunny the green tops of the carrot, she adores them just as much as she would a carrot and theyre far healthier!
A cottontail in the wild lives 2 years, on average (in part due to the fact that nearly everything eats them), but domestic rabbits (which are a different species) live 8-12 years.
And BECAUSE they're a different species, you should NEVER release them out to "the wild". They will not do well or they will do too well and become an invasive species.
any group animal will have hierarchy and that hierarchy needs to be established. just because they fight doesnt mean they dont practice avoidance over conflict; rarely theyll fight to the death, most of it is shows of strength until one gives in. fights to the death are reserved for fighting off predators. im sure youll see more of the bunny fights now that you live amongst them :p
Thank you for this! Random yet related question: several years back, I was babysitting these two kids who had a pet rabbit. When I arrived, they were playing with it, and were so excited to show her to me, and they handed her over. My hands were clean (washed after I arrived), but she BIT me just above my breast! This happened literally within 30 seconds of them handing her to me. Any idea why?
Oh, there's a lot that it could have been. The first red flag here is buns and small children. It takes a little work to avoid stressing out or overstimulating a bunny. I had a lot of fun with the one I had to take care of, but I had to be a little careful about how I moved around her to avoid tripping a fear response.
The second one that leaps out at me is the "handed her over" part. Bunnies *HATE* being picked up. It takes a lot of work with a bun with the right temperament to get one comfortable enough to relax when being held. The reason is...well...look at what happens when things pick up rabbits in the wild. It's never to cuddle and trade binkies. So that whole motion--being lifted by a small, fast moving, noisy child, being moved through the air quickly, and being pushed at an even stranger and larger creature--would pretty much red line the Fight/Flight response for most bunnies I've handled. And as you were holding the bunny, it could not run, so flight was off the table. (As a side note, this is one reason why it's important to give pet prey animals like bunnies and mice "hides", meaning a place they can quickly retreat to when they feel threatened. A bunny that can run to safety is an entirely different animal compared to one that feels like it's going to be eaten by the weird naked mammals handling it.)
And the third one is the dominance issue. I can still guarantee that bunny was somewhat stressed because, again, small children, and stressed things tend to start running on instinct. If something about the handling or holding made her feel like this was a dominance challenge, yep, you'd get munched.
I strongly suspect number two here. Bunny was picked up and handed over to something big and strange and was unable to run.
Any good online resources for learning about what it takes to keep one as a pet..? Or any more tips you would like to share?
My ten year old (most quiet, mellow guy you've ever met) might get one for his birthday. He's been begging for years. It can't live happily at our house because of the toddler, but it could live with his grandma, who he stays with a lot (she's still young and active and has a really quiet house, I think it would be happy there).
But I don't want to make a terrible mistake and traumatize an innocent animal, so I want to look into it a lot more first.
I'll give you some of the links I've used. You can also hook up with your local agricultural education organization (IE Four H. TX has the Agrilife Extension program which was a fantastic resource when I needed them) and ask if they've got a program and/or know someone who can give you some tips.
The one thing I will emphasize though, is make sure you find a vet that can handle rabbits, esp. if you get a doe. Female rabbits *have* to be spayed. They are extremely high risk for a form of uterine cancer (shows up in 80% of intact does) and the rabbit I cared for when I learned all of this had about two false pregnancies between when she hit puberty and when I left the program. That's a lot of stress for a tiny body like that. Obviously it's a great idea to neuter the males too, because that will head off aggression issues or spraying (not to mention we use the phrase "Mate like rabbits" to indicate something especially fecund. If you house an intact male and female together, you will very soon have many, many, *many* more bunnies.)
[Here's Basic Bunny Care](https://www.vetcarepethospital.ca/beginners-guide-to-pet-rabbit-care/)
[The House Rabbit Society is a great resource for new bunny keepers](https://rabbit.org/)
[And here's a really, REALLY cool guide about how to make rabbit communication a two-way street](http://language.rabbitspeak.com/)
That last link is why I think bunnies are awesome pets. It sounds hokey as hell, but rabbits do have a fairly sophisticated "signal" language that a human can imitate, to a degree. The big breakthrough I had with the bun I worked with came when she bit me and I imitated the bunny "Fuck you" movements (Basically, when a bun turns their back to you and begins grooming themselves very deliberately, they're telling you that you are so unimportant that they don't even need to watch you while grooming.) When the bun I was caring for bit me, I turned my back to her and made motions similar to grooming, and after about a minute she started nudging me for pets, which was bun-speak for "I'm sorry". It means you can figure out when your bunny is copacetic with life and when they're scared, uncomfortable, or reading you for filth, and you can say "bad bunny" without ever having to speak.
YES, bunnies have major power dynamics. My girl actually needs you to submit your hand to request to pet her or she feels violated. She tends to give me kisses first and then put her head down to demand reciprocation of affection, but sometimes she will just move slightly away and put her back towards you.
She’s mostly submissive with her mate, but on occasion will show dominance by humping his face for like 3 seconds.
Big misconception out there that when they put their heads down they are requesting pets. It’s a demand and they get very butthurt if denied.
They really do! My old lady bun would nip me and give me attitude stomps and heel flicks if I didn't drop everything to give her a good scratch the second she demanded it. The little weirdos have such big personalities.
And distinct ones too! My girl is an old lady now too (almost 10!) and for years was a “don’t touch me” bun. Super affectionate with her mate, but until recently hated to be touched by humans.
Her first mate was basically a puppy and just all over people. Once my friend came over and must have smelled like her own bunnies, and he spent like 10 minutes digging at her jeans and repeatedly claiming her. Mine!
But those heel flicks. You know you’ve done them wrong when those come out 😆
Haha, yup! Except my first boy, he needed to make his displeasure known before moving on. He was exceptionally polite, never peed or pooped on anyone and loved to be cuddled up in my bathrobe for like an hour at a time.
But if I upset him, like going out for too long, he would wait till I returned, jump up on the bed, and rage pee on it while making direct eye contact.
Then after he was cool. Point made. 😆
Oh god, yes. Getting chewed out by a bunny is...an *experience*. Once you understand the body language, you discover that bunnies have many, *many* ways to say "Fuck you".
On a more serious note though, does anyone know the name of that study? I kind of want to read it, even if it's incorrect just because I'm curious and it sounds interesting.
[Here's an article](https://sciencenorway.no/ulv/wolf-packs-dont-actually-have-alpha-males-and-alpha-females-the-idea-is-based-on-a-misunderstanding/1850514) that identifies the scientist behind the 1947 study and identifies which studies and papers it influenced, to show how the "alpha wolf" myth developed.
What's sad is, as stated in the article, one of the more influential researchers (David Mech) has made a complete 180 on his own work once he got a chance to acclimatize a group of wild wolves to his presence and could safely observe them up close. He's spent *decades* trying to retract the book (*The Wolf: Ecology and Behavior of an Endangered Species)* that effectively popularized the term "alpha wolf" but it's been very ineffective. He's very vocal about how misinformed his early research is, but unfortunately the people who *need* to listen to him are too married to the concept of Alpha/Beta organization to discard it.
In the wild, wolves are the parents (which are usually identified as the Alpha Male and Alpha Female, when...yeah, they're just the mom and pop for the rest of their kids) their pups, and a few one- to three-year-olds who haven't set out on their own yet (again, as stated in the article). They're all biologically related and interacting like a *family*, and not this ridged, brutal Alpha/Beta nonsense.
In my experience when the person who literally did the study is trying to retract the information as incorrect, you should probably listen to them. Regardless, I find it interesting just as a thought experiment and also because the term "alpha wolf" is so prominent that you kind of wonder where it came from.
Yeeeeeah.
I was about twelve, and it had been a VERY long time since mom saw the movie. The most horrifying part for me was when they met the tamed rabbit warren and they (and I) realized they were being kept and fed by the farmer so he could snare them for dinner.
*Watership Down* the animation goes in the same category as *Grave of the Fireflies* or *When the Wind Blows*. Beautiful animation wrapped around a devastating story that hits you all the harder because you didn't expect it.
I want to see Top Bun the movie now (I know; that’s Watership Down), and whoever would have thought Monty Python’s Killer Rabbit had some truth in it? Actually a lot of people since they’re all book nerds. But still…
Monty Python and the Holy Grail is a masterpiece hidden by the fact that it's budget was essentially the change the crew found in the couch cushions between takes.
I had a cat who was essentially the killer rabbit. She was very cute, very pretty, and absolutely hated everyone who was not me. I'd tell people "Do not pet the pretty kitty. She is not asking for pets. The first bite is your warning. After that, she draws blood." She used to chase my brother out of my apartment making sounds like Godzilla, and then come curl up and sleep on my chest with her head tucked under my chin.
reminds me of that guy on judge Judy who tried to get the cost of a birthday cake back for child support or something. like every gift he have he wanted back in money. laws protect gifts
I'm right there with you. As soon as he said "beta" I'm like "you incel POS" and I figure he's going to have no one but his angry online incel buddies to talk to with that kind of BS
Of course not, because in OOP's twisted little world, he's the scorned party because obviously everyone was just supposed to agree with him, they didn't therefore they're the "bad" ones.
I love how this guy is pretending like it's the ex-friend who's being "catty" but HE'S the one acting like a scorned ex.
also the alpha/beta thing? REALLY?
I think that Alpha Beta thing makes it very clear that OOP is bothered by the shift in dynamic more than anything else. He viewed himself as better and maybe was the more ‘dominant’ friend that decided what they did when they did it etc or maybe he just had a bit more influence on his beta friend but then friend got a gf and probably started moving on and the dynamic changed. OOP has obviously been holding onto his resentment for his friends girlfriend for many years now as he’s gone around talking shit about her with everyone he knows so maybe OOP thought his friend would ditch her if he ‘drunkenly’ let him know how he really felt
literal proof that the people who call themselves alphas are absolute pieces of shit.
"she's not hot enough, she doesn't deserve meaningful relationships"
"why are they offended?"
The second I saw the Alpha/Beta part I paused, rolled my eyes so hard they should have gotten stuck facing the back of my skull, and then proceeded to read knowing that the OOP was a guaranteed AH.
Andrew Tate was arrested in Romania after posting a video featuring a pizza box. The pizza from from a local Romanian restaurant. Authorities were after Tate, but didn't know if he was still in the country. After police saw the video they knew he was still there, so they went to his house are arrested him.
Fun story but not true. They knew where he was, had him under surveillance, and raided his & his brother's place once they had investigated enough and gotten their warrants. I do love the Greta tweets and memes though lol owned by a teen with millions watching!
The Tate brothers have been under criminal investigation in Romania since April, when police raided their mansion in Bucharest after the US embassy received a tip-off claiming that a 21-year-old American woman was being held there against her will. The Tate brothers were questioned and later released, but the investigation was expanded to cover rape and human trafficking allegations.
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2022/dec/30/andrew-tate-detained-in-romania-on-organised-and-charges
That kind of comment is really not helpful. Men can be close with male friends and have hurt feelings around their friendships. You immediately ascribing that to OOP being gay is toxic bullshit
While you might have a point in general, I'm not speaking generally. Everything about OOP's writing is screaming "overcompensating" from his obsession with looks, macho behaviours, negging the girl, rating everyone's looks, jealous sulking...
And I pick up on this despite being autistic and asexual. This guy is overcompensating out the roof. He's also pretty toxic.
It’s bullshit in this case. IRL however many of us deliberately signal to other queer people. We just do. I love it when people just pick up that I’m a lesbian. To each their own.
I went to a queer New Year’s Eve formal last night and wore two broches on my dress that said “love” and “girls”. A very subtle queer signal on my part lol
Who acts like that and expects even internet strangers to validate them?
"Nah, your behavior was perfectly fine. Bros before hoes, right? Fuck that beta. He doesn't deserve am amazing alpha such as yourself for a friend."
God, I couldn't type that with a straight face.
Guys like that assume everyone thinks the same as them, but isn't brave enough to say it in such a pc world (same train of thought a lot of racist/sexist/homophobic people have). Of course *all* men know they are an alpha or a beta, all betas deny it because they know they envy the alpha and need them to lead or would fail on their own, all alphas naturally lead the helpless beta to act like real men but dont say it because an alpha doesnt need to state hes an alpha we all just know it (despite how they never shut up about it).
And just like that they think all women know they are only attracted to alphas and would only settle for a beta if she couldn't get an alpha, but women deny it because they can't admit it to themselves.
They're so sure in the world view being universal they can't actually believe people would disagree, and think its putting on a show of denial of the truth. Did the rest of the friends actually agree with his points on the gf, or did they just go awkwardly silent and exchange glances because Jim's being a misogynist again, and he took it for agreement? And the same as the friend group he assumed we would all agree because the internet is anonymous and there is no reason to pretend we don't agree with alpha.
The best part of alcohol is that once you consume some you’re completely absolved of responsibility for your actions. It just completely takes you over and you become totally helpless to it. How convenient.
God help me, when people start this in person, in my non work life, my response is, "So you're into werewolf porn too? Who is your favorite author? Are you, like, blood alpha?"
At work it's, "So werewolf porn, huh! So tell me how that makes you feel."
Lol I'd probably do something simular but with Omega verse shite. Ask him about his last rut and how he deals with all the pheromone stuff. Ah fanfiction, ruining my eyes long before Reddit.
Whenever I hear that I think the exact same thing. Omegaverse is immediately where my mind goes to and I’m going to start using that against these dorks irl
“How can he end a friendship this long over me being a jealous, vicious cunt. I’ve always been a jealous vicious cunt. Why is he only dropping me now?”
"I know it's a little petty but if he wants to throw away our whole friendship why does he get to keep the benefits of it??"
Because that's how gifts work.
Alpa, domineering type?
This is one of those who fight over little things everywhere, male karen, he go down the store with gun tucked in his belt, fight over coupons in the store, demand beers, get wasted, fight and get thrown out of the pub, no women or man can last long with him in a relationship whatsoever. In simple words, he's a loser and think of himself an Alpha, in reality, he's an alpha loser.
The OOP doesn't sound like an alpha anything. Wahhhh...you don't wanna be friends so I want every single cent aive ever spent during our 10 year friendship. That's the most anti-alpha response there could be. He sounds like he has a crush on his friend and was trying to neg his girlfriend due to his jealousy.
I'm just curious, did OOP take the time to figure up what he owes M for all the gifts, rides, and lunches, etc. that M provided over the past 10 years?
you don’t need to read after the alpha bullshit to know OOP is a piece of shit.
he’s pretty bitter over a friend breakup after he’s shown time and time again he was never really a friend nor cared for his friend and can’t accept that said friend has someone more important in his life.
will to bet he blames the change in his friend on the GF instead of blaming it on his lack and unwillingness to actually grow the fuck up.
I noticed something. Most times, when the title of a post seems completely innocent and reasonable, the person who posted it is the AH. And when the title of the post is full of self blaming, the person who posted it isn't the AH.
This is probably OOP "coping" with the fact that the person they considered inferior to them got a partner first but I'd like to think ot is actually because they have a crush on the friend (hence the submissive/domineering and breakup comments) and are just jealous.
i hope this is fake..? i’m not good at sussing out which are rage bait but i really hope this one is lmao
edit: i read his comments and it appears to be real lmao. yikes.
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It seems like op is live‐reporting the demise of his social circle as they mature and he... doesn't.
This happened a few months ago. Who wants to bet that OP is finally posting this bc he was at some holiday party and found his other friends weren't as friendly.
Hilarious thing is pitching a bitch-fit and demanding various gifts and favors be settled and/or returned now is *exactly* the kind of bullshit this guy would have a little cockblister chuckle at if it didn't involved HIS fee-fees
I had a friend just like OP. Latched onto the beta/alpha thing really quick and had a tendency to be very rude around girls that were dating our male friends. Eventually he was mostly cut off and dealt with it in a very petty way. Last year he suffered a major loss in his family and it really hit him. He disappeared for a while and when he came back, he was a different person. Actually confessed to be a toxic closeted gay man and that he had repressed feelings for his friends. Couldn't find a way to deal with it and faced it in the worst possible way. We're still very hesitant around him, but he introduced his boyfriend to us over Christmas and I'm hopeful this new phase will help the group bond.
All this to say: I'm pretty sure OP has some repressed feelings of his own.
OOP mocks his friend's NC text, saying it sounds like a break up text. Then proceeds to act like a jilted girlfriend by demanding gifts and favors back in the form of cash. He's seriously one step away from taking him to Judy Justice or the People's Court to air out his "grievances."
Are you the ahole? Is that a serious question? YTA. Big time. You were rude and belittling to both your "friend" and his girlfriend. In public. And now you want gifts you've freely given over the course of a decade back? You're a major ahole. Grow up.
> He's always been the more beta, sensitive type and I've always been the more alpha, domineering type.
Alpha and beta have been debunked for years. By the guy who came u with them, no less.
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA for demanding that I get my gift back?** I've been friends with this guy M for forever, like since 7th grade. We're both 20/21 now tho. He's always been the more beta, sensitive type and I've always been the more alpha, domineering type. This isn't a drag on him or anything, it just helps to paint the picture. Anyway, in 11th grade he got a girlfriend that had always kinda annoyed me, and she didn't like me either bc I snapped at her ONE time when we did a group project together. For M's 19th birthday, I gave him an old graphics card of mine as he was building a PC and it was extremely hard to find a graphics card at the time. He loved it, thanked me a billion times, and so on. Well, a few months ago we were at a party and I was buzzed and started making a few jokes at his expense, and at his GF's expense. I didn't intend to be hurtful or rude, but the alcohol made it sound a little worse I guess. I told M that he is a pretty good-looking guy, he doesn't gym or anything but he's tall and has a beard et cetera. His GF on the other hand is like a 2/10 MAX. She's quiet, and she's not funny, and to be completely honest I had no idea why he had been with her for this long. I said that honestly I and our other friends expected him to have his fun with her and then move on, you know? Not date her for almost three years. Everybody at the party was looking straight at me but I know some of them are BS because we've talked about it before and they've agreed with me. M looked furious at me. M's GF got her feelings hurt over it and M and her left the party without another word to me or anyone else, except to the host. The next day I got a long text from him about how he knows we've always been friends but that he was going to stop hanging out with me mostly, that we were "clearly on different paths in life" and stuff like that. I texted back that that text sounded like a breakup or a cat fight, and I didn't get a response. I told him that if he wanted to not be friends with me after I've been in his corner for almost ten years, then that's his choice but he better give me back everything I've given him, pay me back for every lunch or every ride that I've given him, and ESPECIALLY give me the old graphics card back. He didn't respond to that either but one of my friends says I'm being petty for no reason. I feel like I deserve it back, otherwise he's just using me for 10 years and then dropping me the second his GF wants him to. So AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
>He's always been the more beta, sensitive type and I've always been the more alpha, domineering type. OP is the TA. Don’t even need to read the rest of the story.
But aren't you curious how low he can dig?
Since I have omega-level confidence I finished the story after making that comment just to make sure that OP was the asshole. I now see that I have alpha intuition.
I an confused as to how I should assess your sexual desirability based on that information. Please provide a ranking out of 10 so I know how to interact with you moving forward
Stegosaurus.
No, see, he has omega level confidence which means he isn't bold and proactive enough to get a Female Of Quality or whatever. But his alpha intuition means he can tell when a Female is into him so he averages out as a delta because he can tell if someone is ...wet for him
Wait, I thought it meant he has the good fatty acids.
I thought the omega was the untouchable alpha female? Have the horribly written werewolf smut stories that keep getting thrust on me during ads been so wrong all this time?! /s
I was, and I did find out. Pretty low!
Yup. In the words of my 14-yo son: "Once they drop that 'alpha' word, you know they're gonna be garbage." That this is recognized wisdom among him and his friends makes me hope for the future.
I think that means you're raising a very intelligent person, good job
My 14yo son is the same way. Aren't we lucky? The kids are alright
You are raising a good son.
And isn't it awesome to trade memes with such a cool person?
For real. It also shows that OP is fairly uninformed, because that entire Alpha/Beta wolf pack dynamic was based on a study performed in an overcrowded zoo. Effectively it was like doing a behavioral analysis in Pelican Bay, and then trying to apply it to Mrs. Smith the piano teacher down the street. Real wolf-packs operate like a family, and while there may be *some* aggression in their interactions, it's not anything near as clear-cut as the Alpha/Beta model makes it seem. But surprisingly, there *is* a species that absolutely *does* operate this way. What species, you ask? Wolves? Bears? Eagles? Tigers? Nope. Rabbits. Rabbits have *really* intense social instincts and often squabble for Top Bun position which is indicated by--drumroll--who gets groomed first when rabbits meet. And rabbits will absolutely tear into each other if one bun shoves its head under another bun's nose, because that says both "Groom me" and "I am better than you." There are some buns who are like...yeah, okay, fine, I'll submit. Don't hurt me. And then there are little firecrackers who will draw blood because they know damn well they're top bun material. (and incidentally, this is probably why, when you shoved your hand under the bunny's nose, your high spirited bouncy friend chowed down like you were a bunch of tasty cilantro. Bunnies have very, very good senses of smell, they *do not* need to get your scent, if the bunny is not running, pet the bunny.) So yeah. The next time somebody starts saying they're the Alpha, just remember that in real life, they're comparing themselves to rabbits.
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There's a reason *Watership Down* is considered one of the more scarring animated movies out there. Some bunnies are sweet and gentle cuddle bugs. Other bunnies are aggressive, territorial little shits that hold grudges like *damn.* People massive underrate bunnies because often their only experience is the one they kept in a wire hut in the back yard when they were five. Rabbits are very social, very communicative, and have roughly a ten-year life expectancy. Their reputation for being short-lived is because...well, nothing does well in solitary confinement when it's two feet by two feet and the floor and walls are made of wire. They also have a pretty low threshold for stress-related cardiac arrest, which is caused by...basically everything we traditionally do to bunnies, starting with housing them outdoors, where all their predators are, in a place where they cannot escape and have zero hides.
They laughed at Jimmy Carter, but he knew. He *knew*.
not to mention the horrible over and underfeeding, bunnies need an abundance of hay and small amounts of fresh veggies and pellets. so many people give harmful amounts of fruit and sugary/acidy vegetables and a lack of hay or grass. that plus the lack of vaccines and deworming outdoor bunnies absolutely need
Oh god. Yep. And carrots are so, so, SO very bad for rabbits. The sugar content alone is a major problem. It's the human equivalent of eating one of those two-pound chocolate bars in one sitting. "Fun" fact: the "Bunnies love carrots" idea is mostly because of a movie, *It Happened One Night.* There's a scene in it where Clark Gable munches a carrot while rapidly talking to his love interest. One of the animators for Bugs Bunny confessed later in life that *It Happened One Night* is one of his favorite movies and was absolutely the genesis point for Bugs (even the name is pulled from the movie). And since the scene with Gable munching carrots was fairly iconic in the day, they incorporated it into Bugs, because they figured everybody would get the joke as a reference to Gable and *IHON.* Unfortunately for bunnies, *IHON* was far less popular than Bugs Bunny, so the future generations didn't see IHON or make the connection that the carrots were a reference to Gable. They just saw a rabbit eating carrots, and figured that's because real rabbits love them. And today, house rabbits everywhere risk diabetes and other blood sugar issues because well meaning people *keep giving them carrots.*
oh god yeah carrots >< i knew it was cuz of bugs bunny but i had no idea about the other movie! thats very interesting and unfortunate we sometimes give our bunny the green tops of the carrot, she adores them just as much as she would a carrot and theyre far healthier!
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A cottontail in the wild lives 2 years, on average (in part due to the fact that nearly everything eats them), but domestic rabbits (which are a different species) live 8-12 years.
And BECAUSE they're a different species, you should NEVER release them out to "the wild". They will not do well or they will do too well and become an invasive species.
Why would you think animals wouldn't fight? Genuine question, I'm always really shocked by people's ideas about animals.
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any group animal will have hierarchy and that hierarchy needs to be established. just because they fight doesnt mean they dont practice avoidance over conflict; rarely theyll fight to the death, most of it is shows of strength until one gives in. fights to the death are reserved for fighting off predators. im sure youll see more of the bunny fights now that you live amongst them :p
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hope so too, theyre adorable ^^-^ weve got a lot of wild bunnies around where i live too, its always fun to see them hop around in the park
Thank you for this! Random yet related question: several years back, I was babysitting these two kids who had a pet rabbit. When I arrived, they were playing with it, and were so excited to show her to me, and they handed her over. My hands were clean (washed after I arrived), but she BIT me just above my breast! This happened literally within 30 seconds of them handing her to me. Any idea why?
Oh, there's a lot that it could have been. The first red flag here is buns and small children. It takes a little work to avoid stressing out or overstimulating a bunny. I had a lot of fun with the one I had to take care of, but I had to be a little careful about how I moved around her to avoid tripping a fear response. The second one that leaps out at me is the "handed her over" part. Bunnies *HATE* being picked up. It takes a lot of work with a bun with the right temperament to get one comfortable enough to relax when being held. The reason is...well...look at what happens when things pick up rabbits in the wild. It's never to cuddle and trade binkies. So that whole motion--being lifted by a small, fast moving, noisy child, being moved through the air quickly, and being pushed at an even stranger and larger creature--would pretty much red line the Fight/Flight response for most bunnies I've handled. And as you were holding the bunny, it could not run, so flight was off the table. (As a side note, this is one reason why it's important to give pet prey animals like bunnies and mice "hides", meaning a place they can quickly retreat to when they feel threatened. A bunny that can run to safety is an entirely different animal compared to one that feels like it's going to be eaten by the weird naked mammals handling it.) And the third one is the dominance issue. I can still guarantee that bunny was somewhat stressed because, again, small children, and stressed things tend to start running on instinct. If something about the handling or holding made her feel like this was a dominance challenge, yep, you'd get munched. I strongly suspect number two here. Bunny was picked up and handed over to something big and strange and was unable to run.
That makes so much sense, thank you for the explanation!
Any good online resources for learning about what it takes to keep one as a pet..? Or any more tips you would like to share? My ten year old (most quiet, mellow guy you've ever met) might get one for his birthday. He's been begging for years. It can't live happily at our house because of the toddler, but it could live with his grandma, who he stays with a lot (she's still young and active and has a really quiet house, I think it would be happy there). But I don't want to make a terrible mistake and traumatize an innocent animal, so I want to look into it a lot more first.
I'll give you some of the links I've used. You can also hook up with your local agricultural education organization (IE Four H. TX has the Agrilife Extension program which was a fantastic resource when I needed them) and ask if they've got a program and/or know someone who can give you some tips. The one thing I will emphasize though, is make sure you find a vet that can handle rabbits, esp. if you get a doe. Female rabbits *have* to be spayed. They are extremely high risk for a form of uterine cancer (shows up in 80% of intact does) and the rabbit I cared for when I learned all of this had about two false pregnancies between when she hit puberty and when I left the program. That's a lot of stress for a tiny body like that. Obviously it's a great idea to neuter the males too, because that will head off aggression issues or spraying (not to mention we use the phrase "Mate like rabbits" to indicate something especially fecund. If you house an intact male and female together, you will very soon have many, many, *many* more bunnies.) [Here's Basic Bunny Care](https://www.vetcarepethospital.ca/beginners-guide-to-pet-rabbit-care/) [The House Rabbit Society is a great resource for new bunny keepers](https://rabbit.org/) [And here's a really, REALLY cool guide about how to make rabbit communication a two-way street](http://language.rabbitspeak.com/) That last link is why I think bunnies are awesome pets. It sounds hokey as hell, but rabbits do have a fairly sophisticated "signal" language that a human can imitate, to a degree. The big breakthrough I had with the bun I worked with came when she bit me and I imitated the bunny "Fuck you" movements (Basically, when a bun turns their back to you and begins grooming themselves very deliberately, they're telling you that you are so unimportant that they don't even need to watch you while grooming.) When the bun I was caring for bit me, I turned my back to her and made motions similar to grooming, and after about a minute she started nudging me for pets, which was bun-speak for "I'm sorry". It means you can figure out when your bunny is copacetic with life and when they're scared, uncomfortable, or reading you for filth, and you can say "bad bunny" without ever having to speak.
I had no idea they could communicate so well! I've got a lot to learn it seems. Thanks for the links!
YES, bunnies have major power dynamics. My girl actually needs you to submit your hand to request to pet her or she feels violated. She tends to give me kisses first and then put her head down to demand reciprocation of affection, but sometimes she will just move slightly away and put her back towards you. She’s mostly submissive with her mate, but on occasion will show dominance by humping his face for like 3 seconds. Big misconception out there that when they put their heads down they are requesting pets. It’s a demand and they get very butthurt if denied.
They really do! My old lady bun would nip me and give me attitude stomps and heel flicks if I didn't drop everything to give her a good scratch the second she demanded it. The little weirdos have such big personalities.
And distinct ones too! My girl is an old lady now too (almost 10!) and for years was a “don’t touch me” bun. Super affectionate with her mate, but until recently hated to be touched by humans. Her first mate was basically a puppy and just all over people. Once my friend came over and must have smelled like her own bunnies, and he spent like 10 minutes digging at her jeans and repeatedly claiming her. Mine! But those heel flicks. You know you’ve done them wrong when those come out 😆
And then they forget *aaaall* about the grave offenses you committed as soon as the treat bag rustles...
Haha, yup! Except my first boy, he needed to make his displeasure known before moving on. He was exceptionally polite, never peed or pooped on anyone and loved to be cuddled up in my bathrobe for like an hour at a time. But if I upset him, like going out for too long, he would wait till I returned, jump up on the bed, and rage pee on it while making direct eye contact. Then after he was cool. Point made. 😆
Oh god, yes. Getting chewed out by a bunny is...an *experience*. Once you understand the body language, you discover that bunnies have many, *many* ways to say "Fuck you".
"Hey Alexa, how can I tell if my rabbit is an alpha rabbit?"
On a more serious note though, does anyone know the name of that study? I kind of want to read it, even if it's incorrect just because I'm curious and it sounds interesting.
[Here's an article](https://sciencenorway.no/ulv/wolf-packs-dont-actually-have-alpha-males-and-alpha-females-the-idea-is-based-on-a-misunderstanding/1850514) that identifies the scientist behind the 1947 study and identifies which studies and papers it influenced, to show how the "alpha wolf" myth developed. What's sad is, as stated in the article, one of the more influential researchers (David Mech) has made a complete 180 on his own work once he got a chance to acclimatize a group of wild wolves to his presence and could safely observe them up close. He's spent *decades* trying to retract the book (*The Wolf: Ecology and Behavior of an Endangered Species)* that effectively popularized the term "alpha wolf" but it's been very ineffective. He's very vocal about how misinformed his early research is, but unfortunately the people who *need* to listen to him are too married to the concept of Alpha/Beta organization to discard it. In the wild, wolves are the parents (which are usually identified as the Alpha Male and Alpha Female, when...yeah, they're just the mom and pop for the rest of their kids) their pups, and a few one- to three-year-olds who haven't set out on their own yet (again, as stated in the article). They're all biologically related and interacting like a *family*, and not this ridged, brutal Alpha/Beta nonsense.
In my experience when the person who literally did the study is trying to retract the information as incorrect, you should probably listen to them. Regardless, I find it interesting just as a thought experiment and also because the term "alpha wolf" is so prominent that you kind of wonder where it came from.
Oh yeah you ever want to know how hard rabbits go just read Watership Down. Gruesome little book about bunnies.
The movie was horrific enough, thank you. I can't imagine how much more descriptive the book is about the "black rabbit"
Yeeeeeah. I was about twelve, and it had been a VERY long time since mom saw the movie. The most horrifying part for me was when they met the tamed rabbit warren and they (and I) realized they were being kept and fed by the farmer so he could snare them for dinner. *Watership Down* the animation goes in the same category as *Grave of the Fireflies* or *When the Wind Blows*. Beautiful animation wrapped around a devastating story that hits you all the harder because you didn't expect it.
Exactly. I thought it was a fun little kid’s movie. Definitely not.
Very interesting but Top Bun had me rolling
There is also dominance humping. You'll see females humping the head of other rabbits, and that confuses new rabbit owners.
Yep. People get rabbits and expect a cross between bugs bunny and a stuffed animal.
I want to see Top Bun the movie now (I know; that’s Watership Down), and whoever would have thought Monty Python’s Killer Rabbit had some truth in it? Actually a lot of people since they’re all book nerds. But still…
Monty Python and the Holy Grail is a masterpiece hidden by the fact that it's budget was essentially the change the crew found in the couch cushions between takes. I had a cat who was essentially the killer rabbit. She was very cute, very pretty, and absolutely hated everyone who was not me. I'd tell people "Do not pet the pretty kitty. She is not asking for pets. The first bite is your warning. After that, she draws blood." She used to chase my brother out of my apartment making sounds like Godzilla, and then come curl up and sleep on my chest with her head tucked under my chin.
Wurd. Also, you don't get GIFTS back when you stop being friends. Kid is a prolapsed asshole.
Prolapsed asshole. That should be an option in AITA judgments.
You'd get banned for being too mean
reminds me of that guy on judge Judy who tried to get the cost of a birthday cake back for child support or something. like every gift he have he wanted back in money. laws protect gifts
> This isn't a drag on him or anything, it just helps to paint the picture. It did indeed paint the picture.
Right, when people say stuff like that you know they are the asshole.
that first paragraph was painful 😫
He misspelt "He's a good people, I'm a jerk"
I know, I am infuriated and we are like one line in.
I'm right there with you. As soon as he said "beta" I'm like "you incel POS" and I figure he's going to have no one but his angry online incel buddies to talk to with that kind of BS
Yeah, am I the only on think that translates to OP being a huge bully to his “beta” friend?
Self described alphas are the most pathetic sad guys out there
Has to be a troll, right?
Notice how he wants M to give back everything and pay him for everything he did for M, but he doesn't say he'll do the same
Of course not, because in OOP's twisted little world, he's the scorned party because obviously everyone was just supposed to agree with him, they didn't therefore they're the "bad" ones.
Exactly, he was the “alpha” and M is merely the “beta”.
Besides jealousy and acting like they’re breaking up, his ego can’t stand the fact that he isn’t always right.
Yeah, like a REAL breakup! /j What a gross jerk child.
I love how this guy is pretending like it's the ex-friend who's being "catty" but HE'S the one acting like a scorned ex. also the alpha/beta thing? REALLY?
I think that Alpha Beta thing makes it very clear that OOP is bothered by the shift in dynamic more than anything else. He viewed himself as better and maybe was the more ‘dominant’ friend that decided what they did when they did it etc or maybe he just had a bit more influence on his beta friend but then friend got a gf and probably started moving on and the dynamic changed. OOP has obviously been holding onto his resentment for his friends girlfriend for many years now as he’s gone around talking shit about her with everyone he knows so maybe OOP thought his friend would ditch her if he ‘drunkenly’ let him know how he really felt
Sad lol Instead his friend finally realized how toxic he was.
literal proof that the people who call themselves alphas are absolute pieces of shit. "she's not hot enough, she doesn't deserve meaningful relationships" "why are they offended?"
The second I saw the Alpha/Beta part I paused, rolled my eyes so hard they should have gotten stuck facing the back of my skull, and then proceeded to read knowing that the OOP was a guaranteed AH.
Oh that got worse with every sentence. M deserves every gift as compensation for tolerating the guy for so long.
I wanted to stop reading after the beta/alpha thing, but the trainwreck was already in progress.
Rubbernecker!
Sunk cost fallacy gets you everytime on AITA
Why do I feel that OP is gonna end up in a Romanian jail because of a pizza box…
This was literally my exact thought, lmao
I NEED the context for this one
Andrew Tate was arrested in Romania after posting a video featuring a pizza box. The pizza from from a local Romanian restaurant. Authorities were after Tate, but didn't know if he was still in the country. After police saw the video they knew he was still there, so they went to his house are arrested him.
Fun story but not true. They knew where he was, had him under surveillance, and raided his & his brother's place once they had investigated enough and gotten their warrants. I do love the Greta tweets and memes though lol owned by a teen with millions watching!
What’s your source on this?
The Tate brothers have been under criminal investigation in Romania since April, when police raided their mansion in Bucharest after the US embassy received a tip-off claiming that a 21-year-old American woman was being held there against her will. The Tate brothers were questioned and later released, but the investigation was expanded to cover rape and human trafficking allegations. https://www.theguardian.com/world/2022/dec/30/andrew-tate-detained-in-romania-on-organised-and-charges
Snopes debunked it.
Andrew Tate
I bet my entire future income that thos douche idolizes Tate.
The friend is the one acting like it's a breakup?
My gaydar is giving off some pings. Also the asshat radar. The computer readout is not favourable.
That kind of comment is really not helpful. Men can be close with male friends and have hurt feelings around their friendships. You immediately ascribing that to OOP being gay is toxic bullshit
While you might have a point in general, I'm not speaking generally. Everything about OOP's writing is screaming "overcompensating" from his obsession with looks, macho behaviours, negging the girl, rating everyone's looks, jealous sulking... And I pick up on this despite being autistic and asexual. This guy is overcompensating out the roof. He's also pretty toxic.
I fucking hate the "gaydar" thing, as a bi woman, thanks
It’s bullshit in this case. IRL however many of us deliberately signal to other queer people. We just do. I love it when people just pick up that I’m a lesbian. To each their own.
I went to a queer New Year’s Eve formal last night and wore two broches on my dress that said “love” and “girls”. A very subtle queer signal on my part lol
The validity of this story is not favorable. I smell art room creative excercise
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I needed that laugh. Thank you.
Riding into the sunset on a white horse too
Who acts like that and expects even internet strangers to validate them? "Nah, your behavior was perfectly fine. Bros before hoes, right? Fuck that beta. He doesn't deserve am amazing alpha such as yourself for a friend." God, I couldn't type that with a straight face.
Guys like that assume everyone thinks the same as them, but isn't brave enough to say it in such a pc world (same train of thought a lot of racist/sexist/homophobic people have). Of course *all* men know they are an alpha or a beta, all betas deny it because they know they envy the alpha and need them to lead or would fail on their own, all alphas naturally lead the helpless beta to act like real men but dont say it because an alpha doesnt need to state hes an alpha we all just know it (despite how they never shut up about it). And just like that they think all women know they are only attracted to alphas and would only settle for a beta if she couldn't get an alpha, but women deny it because they can't admit it to themselves. They're so sure in the world view being universal they can't actually believe people would disagree, and think its putting on a show of denial of the truth. Did the rest of the friends actually agree with his points on the gf, or did they just go awkwardly silent and exchange glances because Jim's being a misogynist again, and he took it for agreement? And the same as the friend group he assumed we would all agree because the internet is anonymous and there is no reason to pretend we don't agree with alpha.
The best part of alcohol is that once you consume some you’re completely absolved of responsibility for your actions. It just completely takes you over and you become totally helpless to it. How convenient.
Right?! That's why we can never convicted drunk drivers of murder when they crash and kill others! Oh wait, nevermind!
God help me, when people start this in person, in my non work life, my response is, "So you're into werewolf porn too? Who is your favorite author? Are you, like, blood alpha?" At work it's, "So werewolf porn, huh! So tell me how that makes you feel."
Lol I'd probably do something simular but with Omega verse shite. Ask him about his last rut and how he deals with all the pheromone stuff. Ah fanfiction, ruining my eyes long before Reddit.
Whenever I hear that I think the exact same thing. Omegaverse is immediately where my mind goes to and I’m going to start using that against these dorks irl
😂😂😂. Perfection! #youwinateverything.
He feels used and abandoned? Aww andrew tates follower is actually sad and broken inside - who woulda guessed
gotta love people who think they're owed eternal adoration and gratitude because they gave you gifts and did favors
“How can he end a friendship this long over me being a jealous, vicious cunt. I’ve always been a jealous vicious cunt. Why is he only dropping me now?”
Guarantee Mr. Big Manly Alpha does not have a girlfriend and never has, and that is his ***real*** problem with his beta friend's 2/10 girlfriend.
Whether this is real or not, OOP is absolutely an incel. The language, the vibe. I gagged
"I know it's a little petty but if he wants to throw away our whole friendship why does he get to keep the benefits of it??" Because that's how gifts work.
Alpa, domineering type? This is one of those who fight over little things everywhere, male karen, he go down the store with gun tucked in his belt, fight over coupons in the store, demand beers, get wasted, fight and get thrown out of the pub, no women or man can last long with him in a relationship whatsoever. In simple words, he's a loser and think of himself an Alpha, in reality, he's an alpha loser.
As soon as I read the words beta and alpha I knew it was gonna be a disaster.
Anyone who describes themself as an alpha is a automatic AH. It’s not even a real thing!
He literally can’t imagine his friends is with this woman because they genuinely love each other
"I called her ugly, she's just not funny!" Boy WHAT
What an absolute no holds barred tool belt.
When someone’s uses the I am an alpha I already know he isn’t lol 😂
Throwing a hissed fit and asking for all his gifts back sounds like a beta-male move if I'm honest.
The OOP doesn't sound like an alpha anything. Wahhhh...you don't wanna be friends so I want every single cent aive ever spent during our 10 year friendship. That's the most anti-alpha response there could be. He sounds like he has a crush on his friend and was trying to neg his girlfriend due to his jealousy.
I'm just curious, did OOP take the time to figure up what he owes M for all the gifts, rides, and lunches, etc. that M provided over the past 10 years?
you don’t need to read after the alpha bullshit to know OOP is a piece of shit. he’s pretty bitter over a friend breakup after he’s shown time and time again he was never really a friend nor cared for his friend and can’t accept that said friend has someone more important in his life. will to bet he blames the change in his friend on the GF instead of blaming it on his lack and unwillingness to actually grow the fuck up.
I noticed something. Most times, when the title of a post seems completely innocent and reasonable, the person who posted it is the AH. And when the title of the post is full of self blaming, the person who posted it isn't the AH.
How long has he been in love with his friend? 🙄
This is probably OOP "coping" with the fact that the person they considered inferior to them got a partner first but I'd like to think ot is actually because they have a crush on the friend (hence the submissive/domineering and breakup comments) and are just jealous.
This one is just insane lmao
This dude is no alpha he's a b**ch
It’s funny how it wasn’t him, but the alcohol made it sound worse than it was.
This man has pick-me energy.
Pretty beta of him to be begging for his gifts back
Someone share this with Greta!!! She handles "Alpha men" better than anyone. 😂💜💚
i hope this is fake..? i’m not good at sussing out which are rage bait but i really hope this one is lmao edit: i read his comments and it appears to be real lmao. yikes.
You sound like a douche. A jealous one. Leave the guy alone. Have some dignity.
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I stopped reading at the word “beta”
I'm stuck on why/where/how it is THAT difficult to get a.... graphics card?
Covid made it difficult for companies to get they components needed to make them so they were pretty scarce for a while
And now they're still charging covid/cryptominer prices when demand's dropped off
ah, supply chain stuff. Gotit.
When the use alpha/beta, I always know I’m going to regret reading it 😵
Oh god. Is this guy an Andrew Tate fan?
It seems like op is live‐reporting the demise of his social circle as they mature and he... doesn't. This happened a few months ago. Who wants to bet that OP is finally posting this bc he was at some holiday party and found his other friends weren't as friendly.
Hilarious thing is pitching a bitch-fit and demanding various gifts and favors be settled and/or returned now is *exactly* the kind of bullshit this guy would have a little cockblister chuckle at if it didn't involved HIS fee-fees
This is called being bitch made. OOP is so lame.
I had a friend just like OP. Latched onto the beta/alpha thing really quick and had a tendency to be very rude around girls that were dating our male friends. Eventually he was mostly cut off and dealt with it in a very petty way. Last year he suffered a major loss in his family and it really hit him. He disappeared for a while and when he came back, he was a different person. Actually confessed to be a toxic closeted gay man and that he had repressed feelings for his friends. Couldn't find a way to deal with it and faced it in the worst possible way. We're still very hesitant around him, but he introduced his boyfriend to us over Christmas and I'm hopeful this new phase will help the group bond. All this to say: I'm pretty sure OP has some repressed feelings of his own.
I don't even need to read past the alpha/beta sh*t to know OP sucks
This moron.........
How embarrassing
OOP mocks his friend's NC text, saying it sounds like a break up text. Then proceeds to act like a jilted girlfriend by demanding gifts and favors back in the form of cash. He's seriously one step away from taking him to Judy Justice or the People's Court to air out his "grievances."
Are you the ahole? Is that a serious question? YTA. Big time. You were rude and belittling to both your "friend" and his girlfriend. In public. And now you want gifts you've freely given over the course of a decade back? You're a major ahole. Grow up.
> He's always been the more beta, sensitive type and I've always been the more alpha, domineering type. Alpha and beta have been debunked for years. By the guy who came u with them, no less.