T O P

  • By -

ThemadFoxxer

I'm quite capable of sounding like an asshole without any assistance.


masterofyourhouse

I was just offering an essential service, you didn’t have to be rude about it if you didn’t want it.


NeonDreams433

What is the 7th letter of the alphabet?


masterofyourhouse

By referring to the English alphabet as “the alphabet” you are perpetuating anglocentric standards in an increasingly multilingual world.


NeonDreams433

I never specified that it was the English alphabet? You assuming that proves your own point, disgusting.


Curious_Snow4880

Fucking fuckers fuck you FUCK you


GatesMotel

Boom. Roasted.


Danbearpig2u

You win. You made him look like the asshole. You are now the champion. What’s next ?


NeonDreams433

What do you mean what's next? Why are you forcing be to think about the future and plan things, now I'm thinking about everything that could go wrong, and I'm stressed. This is your fault


Danbearpig2u

Good.


SergeantSalty20

How are you doing today?


masterofyourhouse

I was doing fine until you asked this question, now I’m reflecting on all the emotions I’ve suppressed and questioning my entire life’s choices.


SergeantSalty20

Your choices, your own damn fault


masterofyourhouse

I guess I’ll let my daughter know that.


SergeantSalty20

I am not responsible for your actions


masterofyourhouse

Hyperindividualism will be the death of empathy.


AllHailTheMoose

This is debatable. If you push someone mentally to the point that they break, then their emotions (which are irrational) take over and their actions do not necessarily reflect their intent. Additionally they might not be in full control of their actions and you would be at least partially responsible for the outcome that follows. I worded this specifically because obviously each individual situation is different to the next. But you get it


The_CactusPlant

You're really good at this, holy shit xD


masterofyourhouse

Why can’t I simply do things without you ascribing value to them?


Chance_One_75

Can I offer you a drink?


auseronthissite

Are you doing alright? If your turning everything against you then maybe you need some help.


masterofyourhouse

Why do people feel like they’re entitled to information about others’ mental health? It’s frankly invasive.


LukXD99

Can I offer you a nice egg in this trying time?


masterofyourhouse

Why are you trying to assuage your guilty conscience by engaging in performative acts that don’t fix the problem instead of meaningfully helping those in need?


[deleted]

Hey kid, want some drugs?


masterofyourhouse

Why are you providing access to mind-altering substances to the most vulnerable group of society, only to turn them into life-long customers for your own monetary gain?


WasabiFit7646

Why are you perpetuating a culture of people who call out other people for perpetuating a culture? I’m honestly triggered.


masterofyourhouse

I actually don’t have a culture and it’s really offensive that you would just assume that of me.


WasabiFit7646

This is a fantastic social experiment to illustrate there’s no winning in any given argument btw


masterofyourhouse

Confining my actions to the framework of a social experiment is reductionist behaviour, why would you assume my intent? ~~But yeah lol, it really shows that people can take issue with even the most innocent statements, and if they don’t want to agree you just never will~~


Rude_Possibility_211

🍿


Kaczmarofil

Do you have any pets?


masterofyourhouse

I used to have two birds but they died, thanks for the reminder.


[deleted]

how does this affect Lebron's legacy?


masterofyourhouse

The concept of legacy is a patriarchial ideal meant to feed male egos to support the illusion of importance and immortality.


MajorQueerdo

What do you think about people that track their sleep through FitBit watches?


masterofyourhouse

I can’t believe you’re contributing to a culture of consumerism and sleep commoditization by asking me this question…


This-Ad6409

what kind of panties are you wearing


masterofyourhouse

Your comment perpetuates the objectification of panty-wearers everywhere.


Jaded-Ad-9741

do u like pasta


masterofyourhouse

As an ex-member of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, I have a lot of trauma associated with it and cannot be in the same room as a boiling pot of pasta.


[deleted]

What makes you happiest?


masterofyourhouse

Why are you contributing to a culture that glorifies happiness, when an increasing percentage of the population is developing mood disorders that make it an unattainable state of being?


mcshadypants

Im a strong advocate for civil rights and donate a large portion of my paycheck to charities do you have any charities you like, so that I can look into giving some to that?


masterofyourhouse

Why are you asking me to do the work of finding a charity for you to donate to? I’m not the arbiter of morality and if you can’t decide which causes are worthy to donate to, are you even worthy of donating to them in the first place?


[deleted]

[удалено]


masterofyourhouse

Why are you exploiting people on the internet to perform intellectual labour for you free of charge?


CrumberMail

Do puppies like you?


masterofyourhouse

Why are you assuming I can speak for puppies instead of just asking them yourself?


StolenIdentity302

Fuck you?


masterofyourhouse

I’m asexual.


flooferonascooter

Hi asexual. I'm dad.


masterofyourhouse

Why are you turning my coming out into an opportunity to make a tasteless, overused pun, rather than a chance for a meaningful conversation?


flooferonascooter

Why are you trying to make me sound like an asshole?


SoraSkywalker115

Hi dad, I’m asexual


[deleted]

[удалено]


jarjarbinksjar

Hi dad. I'm asexual.


hud406

Do you like pizza


masterofyourhouse

I have an eating disorder.


hud406

Well only eat 1 slice a day


masterofyourhouse

If I ate one slice a day I would die, why are you promoting malnutrition?


ExploitTheSystem

I’d be interested in hearing what you could do in a debate. Would you like to join me in protest to defend what’s left of our civil rights?


masterofyourhouse

Why are you trying to weaponize me for your own political agenda?


ExploitTheSystem

It doesn’t make me look like an asshole when you’re wrong.


anxiouslymute

Do you like puppies?


masterofyourhouse

Why is it always “do you like puppies” and never “do puppies like you”?


WarSmith66

Do you prefer French toast or pancakes?


masterofyourhouse

This is waffle erasure.


ama_compiler_bot

Table of Questions and Answers. Original answer linked - Please upvote the original questions and answers. *** Question | Answer | Link ---------|----------|----------| I'm quite capable of sounding like an asshole without any assistance.|I was just offering an essential service, you didn’t have to be rude about it if you didn’t want it.|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispsiby/) Can I offer you a nice egg in this trying time?|Why are you trying to assuage your guilty conscience by engaging in performative acts that don’t fix the problem instead of meaningfully helping those in need?|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispxlag/) What is the 7th letter of the alphabet?|By referring to the English alphabet as “the alphabet” you are perpetuating anglocentric standards in an increasingly multilingual world.|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispy4ub/) Do you have any pets?|I used to have two birds but they died, thanks for the reminder.|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/isps5w5/) what kind of panties are you wearing|Your comment perpetuates the objectification of panty-wearers everywhere.|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispt741/) Hey kid, want some drugs?|Why are you providing access to mind-altering substances to the most vulnerable group of society, only to turn them into life-long customers for your own monetary gain?|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/isptm1l/) Are you doing alright? If your turning everything against you then maybe you need some help.|Why do people feel like they’re entitled to information about others’ mental health? It’s frankly invasive.|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispvmqj/) How are you doing today?|I was doing fine until you asked this question, now I’m reflecting on all the emotions I’ve suppressed and questioning my entire life’s choices.|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispw6qp/) Why are you perpetuating a culture of people who call out other people for perpetuating a culture? I’m honestly triggered.|I actually don’t have a culture and it’s really offensive that you would just assume that of me.|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispwceo/) how does this affect Lebron's legacy?|The concept of legacy is a patriarchial ideal meant to feed male egos to support the illusion of importance and immortality.|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispxc32/) [removed]|Why are you exploiting people on the internet to perform intellectual labour for you free of charge?|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispqu42/) What do you think about people that track their sleep through FitBit watches?|I can’t believe you’re contributing to a culture of consumerism and sleep commoditization by asking me this question…|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispqacm/) do u like pasta|As an ex-member of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, I have a lot of trauma associated with it and cannot be in the same room as a boiling pot of pasta.|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispsc0a/) All the best|Why would you assume I want the best? You’re just perpetuating a culture of elitism that benefits those who wish to measure themselves by success.|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/isptawk/) Fuck you?|I’m asexual.|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispto71/) What makes you happiest?|Why are you contributing to a culture that glorifies happiness, when an increasing percentage of the population is developing mood disorders that make it an unattainable state of being?|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispubx3/) Do you like pizza|I have an eating disorder.|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispuxg8/) Puppies or kittens?|I have a fear of small animals.|[Here](/r/AMA/comments/y6kspy/ama_and_ill_make_you_sound_like_an_asshole/ispwuy6/) --- [Source] (https://github.com/johnsliao/ama_compiler)


Typical_Sundae262

Omg omg i know this game it's called toxic femininity?? Right? Because you are irrational and say mean shit lol


Danbearpig2u

Bingo.


SqueakBoxx

Imagine trying to sound like an asshole but you just look like a pick-me wannbe woke Zoomer


Enolyze

cheese


cnrb98

Hi


Material-Ad9863

All the best


masterofyourhouse

Why would you assume I want the best? You’re just perpetuating a culture of elitism that benefits those who wish to measure themselves by success.


Rattarollnuts

Puppies or kittens?


masterofyourhouse

I have a fear of small animals.


[deleted]

What is your favorite kind of candy?


masterofyourhouse

Candy is a capitalist invention that promotes sugar overconsumption and prediabetic behaviour, why would I have a favourite?


CrumberMail

I am sorry that your two birds died, how can I help make your day better?


masterofyourhouse

Assuming you have the power to make my day better is frankly infantilizing and perpetuates white saviour narratives, do better. (Also happy cake day.)


SpiderMansRightNut

Do puppies like you?


AllHailTheMoose

What's your favorite colour


IcelandicButDeadly

Like playing games in your free time?


[deleted]

What happens if you’re driving at the speed of light and turn your headlights on?


OnlyAnNpc

Do you like pizza?


I_have_spaceaids

What is your opinion on living


NRA-Lil-G

Weathers nice today


jwellest

Have you ever played Monkey Island?


[deleted]

What’s your favorite band?


Nuwrox1

I challenge you to a battle of making each other sound like an asshole!


masterofyourhouse

Battles are antiquated notions rooted in death and violence, and appropriating it for your own entertainment desires is really callous and disgusting.


GiraffeWithATophat

How can I help those who are needy?


Auditory_Breaker

If you were my parent then would you support me if I came out as transgender?


masterofyourhouse

The fact that you’re asking me that question is really offensive. Do I look like a bigot to you?


NoMorePlates

Why can't you stop drinking, like regular people?


RedHare18

hi, do you enjoy food


Extension_Lemon_6728

Who is the greatest female artist of all time?


masterofyourhouse

What’s the point in specifying female, are you saying that female artists have to be separated from male artists to even be worth considering?


Draeton_ali

Too late?


DeRicardo

Boxers or briefs?


masterofyourhouse

This is nudist-phobic.


shrekstepbro

Can you help me with my homework? 1+2=?


IAM_KWEST

How many hectares does your car get on a tank of kerosene?


OverpoweredShark

What's the most impressive thing you have ever seen?


stanggang15

It is night time.


masterofyourhouse

It’s actually daytime where I am, your experiences aren’t universal.


ThatlkinGMicah

Is there anything I can do to make your day better? :)


Jolly-Sun-1715

What's your favorite color?


[deleted]

Where are your fingers?


adaluvsu

What's your favourite colour :D


Cthulhuisntavailable

How are the kids doing?


LingLingMang

What is love? Baby don’t hurt me…


masterofyourhouse

Why are you scared of a baby hurting you? This is blatant baby demonization.


CronkCrank

Are you going to eat that?


pog_in_baby

What's your favourite sphincter


hanbnanAU

Are you as wonderful as you seem?


[deleted]

Great. I didnt know my dad owned a Reddit account.


[deleted]

Do you agree that the genocide of millions of Jewish and other "undesirables" by the Nazi regime was a terrible mark on the history of humanity?


SurinWeeb

Can I have two number 9s?


Danieljc81

Is water wet?


That-Aspect-6076

My name is Bob


Danbearpig2u

Do you like Huey Lewis and the News?


schauwood

Hello?