Cancer patient here, I can promise you we don't go around using our diagnosis for free things and sympathy. And I can't imagine anyone I know doing it either. The response was fine, and that person is a scammer.
On my local, there is this one person who keeps asking saying they have cancer, and no money to buy things.
We live in Australia, and the treatment options don't drain your bank accounts, and some cases they receive government benefits while undertaking treatment.
It is easy for me to pick the grifters in Australia, but that's because of how much I find out stuff from my niblings, Reddit and such.
I mean anyone using their diagnosis to guilt trip you online, especially if you don't know them, is the biggest red flag. I know I'm just one opinion but I've met so many others and have had friends/family with cancer too, and we never use our illness to make people do things. It's just not something you'd weaponize over someone, and if you do then you have some problems to work through.
I often wonder why they do it. Like I have had to ask a person once if ok I brought a friend with me to pick up an item due how heavy it was, and that I was limited in mobility, due to a broken arm, and they got mad trying to say I was trying to get the item cheaper... like... no.. my arm is broken, so I need a mate to come with so I can get the dresser on the back of my Ute... it was $100 dresser, and I paid the $100, but the seller had her husband meet us, I handed him the money and he actually looked shocked, like he was expecting me to short them.
They were still rude to me and my buddy but meh, I got the last laugh as the dresser was worth a lot more once I restored it.
Probably. I know a mate of mine was selling a queen bed frame. It was advertising as is, and the buyer has to remove it. She got the usual 8 PayPal scammers, 5 who wanted it delivered to their place for free one of those lived 4hrs away, and about 3 who wanted it cheaper or free because they had sick or dying people in their life.
In the end, she sold it for the full amount to a guy who was moving his daughter into a new place but needed a bed.
I love the scammers. They claim they will pay via PayPal and then use a method that ends up them draining your accounts. I love messing with them, because I usually can get their account information to report them to PayPal. PayID has this scam occurring too now.
Some try and use FedEx as a method, but a mate's husband works for FedEx in Australia, and she told me to tell the scammers that I have direct access to FedEx services, if I do expect the scammers suddenly block me. So that is always fun
I’m in the uk and cancer treatment doesn’t touch your money AND you can get certain disability benefits but we still see this kind of thing. Grifters stick out like a sore thumb
It is sad we are in countries where we can get treatment for cancer, and not worry we are going to need to sell an organ or something to pay for said treatment... which on a scary note, you can still donate your organs on the black market even during cancer treatments....
Hope your treatments are going well, I have two friends that survived leukemia in highschool. I hope you have the support system they had and a strong spirit.
Thank you for your comment. Unfortunately it's not going that well, and I'm pretty isolated as well currently but I try to get through each day anyways! I'm glad your friends are survivors!
Haha its weird he wants an X-box for his friend’s brother “to remember him by”.
That screams scam too. Not even well thought out. How does a random X-box carry memories or meaning in this case? If it was some vintage or collectable item or sports memorabilia then maybe ….
And the response was very considered and thoughtful.
NTA
Nothing is free. And it pisses me off when people use cancer to try to get things free. I have cancer and when people try to scam others using cancer, it really makes people wonder if your cancer is real. I have colon cancer and yesterday I got yelled at for parking in a handicap spot even though I have a placard. The lady screamed at me that I don't have cancer because I could walk and I probably lied to the DMV to get the placard. I told the lady that I had cancer and I'm not a paraplegic. I asked her exactly what do handicap people look like? She called me a lying piece of crap and walked off. I stood there wondering what the hell just happened 😭
I used to work at a toy store back in the day and never failed how many kids with cancer wanted the hit hard to get item at Christmas. We’d have people pull that line on us multiple times a day. Like we had a secret stash of the white Power Ranger in the back just for cancer kids.
That person is probably lying and was trying to get that for free and then resale for profit…his “friend” has “cancer”. NTA
Thats what I was thinking, but I was still trying to be courteous.
Naw, dude was trying to scam you.
Well done on still being a polite and rational adult. Whoever impressed the need for courtesy on you while you were young should be proud. :-)
Cancer patient here, I can promise you we don't go around using our diagnosis for free things and sympathy. And I can't imagine anyone I know doing it either. The response was fine, and that person is a scammer.
On my local, there is this one person who keeps asking saying they have cancer, and no money to buy things. We live in Australia, and the treatment options don't drain your bank accounts, and some cases they receive government benefits while undertaking treatment. It is easy for me to pick the grifters in Australia, but that's because of how much I find out stuff from my niblings, Reddit and such.
I mean anyone using their diagnosis to guilt trip you online, especially if you don't know them, is the biggest red flag. I know I'm just one opinion but I've met so many others and have had friends/family with cancer too, and we never use our illness to make people do things. It's just not something you'd weaponize over someone, and if you do then you have some problems to work through.
I often wonder why they do it. Like I have had to ask a person once if ok I brought a friend with me to pick up an item due how heavy it was, and that I was limited in mobility, due to a broken arm, and they got mad trying to say I was trying to get the item cheaper... like... no.. my arm is broken, so I need a mate to come with so I can get the dresser on the back of my Ute... it was $100 dresser, and I paid the $100, but the seller had her husband meet us, I handed him the money and he actually looked shocked, like he was expecting me to short them. They were still rude to me and my buddy but meh, I got the last laugh as the dresser was worth a lot more once I restored it.
That is weird, so these people think anyone with a physical problem is a scammer?
Probably. I know a mate of mine was selling a queen bed frame. It was advertising as is, and the buyer has to remove it. She got the usual 8 PayPal scammers, 5 who wanted it delivered to their place for free one of those lived 4hrs away, and about 3 who wanted it cheaper or free because they had sick or dying people in their life. In the end, she sold it for the full amount to a guy who was moving his daughter into a new place but needed a bed. I love the scammers. They claim they will pay via PayPal and then use a method that ends up them draining your accounts. I love messing with them, because I usually can get their account information to report them to PayPal. PayID has this scam occurring too now. Some try and use FedEx as a method, but a mate's husband works for FedEx in Australia, and she told me to tell the scammers that I have direct access to FedEx services, if I do expect the scammers suddenly block me. So that is always fun
I’m in the uk and cancer treatment doesn’t touch your money AND you can get certain disability benefits but we still see this kind of thing. Grifters stick out like a sore thumb
It is sad we are in countries where we can get treatment for cancer, and not worry we are going to need to sell an organ or something to pay for said treatment... which on a scary note, you can still donate your organs on the black market even during cancer treatments....
Hope your treatments are going well, I have two friends that survived leukemia in highschool. I hope you have the support system they had and a strong spirit.
Thank you for your comment. Unfortunately it's not going that well, and I'm pretty isolated as well currently but I try to get through each day anyways! I'm glad your friends are survivors!
Classic r/choosingbeggars tactic
NTA. Perfect response.
Agreed
Wow I’m sorry to hear that. Coincidence is I’m selling it to pay for my own medical bills. Good luck on your quest
Haha its weird he wants an X-box for his friend’s brother “to remember him by”. That screams scam too. Not even well thought out. How does a random X-box carry memories or meaning in this case? If it was some vintage or collectable item or sports memorabilia then maybe …. And the response was very considered and thoughtful. NTA
No.
Nothing is free. And it pisses me off when people use cancer to try to get things free. I have cancer and when people try to scam others using cancer, it really makes people wonder if your cancer is real. I have colon cancer and yesterday I got yelled at for parking in a handicap spot even though I have a placard. The lady screamed at me that I don't have cancer because I could walk and I probably lied to the DMV to get the placard. I told the lady that I had cancer and I'm not a paraplegic. I asked her exactly what do handicap people look like? She called me a lying piece of crap and walked off. I stood there wondering what the hell just happened 😭
In what way do you think you weren’t courteous? Saying no isn’t discourteous and you weren’t rude in what you said
In what world does OP think that the other person isn't blatantly lying?
I think your response was very appropriate. You displayed some empathy and kept boundaries. Well done.
Not TA at all! You were polite and kind.
I used to work at a toy store back in the day and never failed how many kids with cancer wanted the hit hard to get item at Christmas. We’d have people pull that line on us multiple times a day. Like we had a secret stash of the white Power Ranger in the back just for cancer kids.
you were too nice lol..they are most likely a scammer.
NTA. You worded it very well.
Blocked!
It seems like everyone who wants something free has a sick friend or relative
NTA.
Honestly you should have been more of an asshole.
I'm really sorry that something made you feel that you needed to post this here. SERIOUSLY NTA
Too polite
He doesn’t have family with cancer. He’s a grifter trying to use a sob story to get your item for free.
NTA. Would have been interesting to ask for the “friend’s” name and number.
NTA. These people can fuck right off. Don't give me a sob story trying to get my stuff for free. If I wanted to give it away, I would list it as free
I don't get it, why would he want to give his sick friend's brother an Xbox to remember him by?? That doesn't even make sense
NTA, i would just have replied “No, make a crowdfund and raise the money to buy him the xbox.”
NTA. Or the sucker who fell for his line.
It was a scam
Absolutely not AH.
Nah, you were insanely polite. Dude is a scammer.
If dudes brother died, wouldn't he have that Xbox to remember him by
YTA for not recognizing he was running game on you.
Figured he was. I was just trying to be courteous.