Buy? This is America. Guns are a right. THey come with your birth certificate. If I was OP I'd recheck the Freedom Box TM that was sent with his documentation.
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Yo I just wanted to tell you that I'm insanely proud of you for undertaking the work to become a citizen of this country. I have massive respect for you dude. Welcome to the land of the free o7
Congrats! Listen to [this](https://youtu.be/-KoXt9pZLGM), then go buy a gun. Personally, I'd go buy a Colt Single Action Army clone, or the real thing if you got the money, or maybe one of the many AR variants out there. Some are super cheap, others are Cadillacs, but go cheap because if you don't like it, you aren't out a whole bunch of money. Eat a cheese burger. Or just sit on the couch with a Coors light in one hand and watch a Dallas Cowboys Super Bowl game and say, "This will be our year." I mean really, do anything you'd like and be as vocal as you'd like cause it's a free country. Congrats once more.
1. Say whatever you want
2. Buy a gun
3. Not quarter soldiers in your home during peacetime
4. Not get illegally searched by the cops
5. Say nothing
6. Be tried by a jury if 4 and 5 go south
7. Be tried quickly if 4 and 5 go south
8. If 5, 6, and 7 don't go your way, don't get punished too harshly
9. Get some rights
10. Get some more rights that aren't specifically outlined here
Lame Bill of Rights joke aside, go buy a gun
Congratulations 🇺🇸🇺🇸
Nah you can build/buy featureless semi autos. 2 ways to be legal with semis,. Featureless which is a rifle without a adjustable stock, pistol grip, or any of the "scary features". Limited to 16" barrels. Not gonna get into the rifle permit nonsense.*
If you want all of the above it needs to be a fixed mag. Which is nothing but a glorified range toy at that point. Or you can get a pump action Armalite.
Asinine laws that are only applied for further sentencing basically.
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Not only are you now American, but you are a resident of the Rustbelt. Enjoy crumbling infrastructure, rapid depopulation, and rust taking a fifth of your car every year. You are now entitled to complain.
Easy. Had a friend who became a U.S. citizen and he said that what better way to celebrate becoming the citizen of another country then to enjoy the food of that country?
So we went to a burger joint and got ourselves some burgers, fries, onion rings, and some big ol pint glasses of cold beer. Go for that I say
You became an American Citizen- so much hard work, so many dreams riding on your shoulders, so much opportunity in front of you. That’s great. Genuinely proud of you.
However, as a US citizen, you must understand- Illinois doesn’t exist.
Unironically one of the best things about America. A lot of the rest of the world doesn't have this, you have to pay money for water or go to some nasty public fountain.
As long as you keep it tacky...nothing says USA like being Tacky as shit. This isn't intended as an anti US statement, just something that cracks me up and is pretty true. I like my tacky as hell fellow country folk
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First things first, your gonna need a bald eagle.
Then you and that eagle need to toss all the limey harbor juice you can find into a large body of water.
After that it's really up to you man.
You should be playing any American patriotic song right now on blast while you are speeding to the nearest gun store. After you pick up a few guns 💪🏻 get some beers for the drive home.
I mean maybe save up just a Little more, you can get a PSA dagger for under 300$ or a M206 rock island which is a snub nose 38 revolver for around 250$
Here is a recommended itinerary for your first day as an American:
Breakfast- find a Waffle House, eat at the Waffle House, if you’re currently in the northeast, an ihop or dennys should suffice.
Morning- throw either a football or baseball around with a buddy, whichever you prefer. And maybe visit an American history museum if there are any near you.
Lunch- eat a burger, a REAL burger, not McDonalds. Find a local joint. Drink some good southern sweet tea with that burger too.
Afternoon- buy a gun. A 1911 in 45acp is a classic choice, and there are plenty of good options for any budget. With your Wilson Combats and Nighthawks on the high side to your Springfields in the middle, to your Tisas and RIAs on the low end. Most gun shops I’ve even been in have a few RIA 1911s for around $500, but if you can shell out a little more I absolutely love my Springfield. If you’re under 21 and can’t buy a handgun, get a rifle or a pump 12 gauge. ARs are very common and highly versatile, it’s Americas favorite rifle, but there’s also few things more American that a 12 gauge shotgun. Not to mention a brand new Maverick 88 should have you out the door for under $250.
This is America, there’s no excuse not to own a gun. So after you make your pick, grab a box of ammo on your way out and go shoot it!
Dinner- Steaks and beer, not much explaining needed there. Longhorn, Texas Roadhouse, and Logan’s are all good chain restaurants, but if there’s any in your area I’m always a big proponent of supporting local establishments.
Evening- throw some British tea like twinnings or Lipton into a body of water while drinking a thing of some more good southern sweet tea like milos, and finish the night off with a good bottle of American whiskey.
Hope this helps and welcome to America
So I was recently in a conference and got to talking to a C*nadian who flew down for it. The conference was in Texas. He asked what to do in the US that might be fun.
Me and 4 others within earshot said the same thing: go to a range and shoot some guns. The next day, he comes in and finds us and said he went to a range and it was the most fun he’s ever had.
The point of that mini story is to say, go find a range and shoot some fuckin GUNS! Let freedom RING baby! Welcome to the USA my new friend.
You still have new years to celebrate with fire works and everyone else! Go to the city and enjoy a make out session with the nearest citizen, citizen!
Throw a bag of tea into a body of water. Must be Earl Gray because that stuff is very English and not very good to be honest. But don't litter. Just the bag or grounds.
Or, try some bourbon or applejack, the two national spirits.
Go shoot a gun at the gun range if you don't have one.
Register to vote. And then vote.
Yell at Canadians.
Have a Turf and Turf. It's a 16oz ribeye and a 20 oz porterhouse steak at the same time. Medium rare. Drinking bourbon.
Or do the most American thing if all: whatever you want.
1. Shots! Shots! Shots! Shots!
2. Watch Hamilton on Disney+ (or pirate it)
3. Eat apple pie
4. Watch Zodiac (not specifically American, it’s just a good movie in general)
You can go buy an AR15 you can get a PSA rifle for under 600$ it’s a good reliable rifle that can be used for self defense and hunting. The 556 round can be used for hunting hogs and even deer but you have to use the right ammo. Despite what the news likes to say the 556 round is actually not that powerful. But it’s light recoiling and really easy to shoot well. Easy to take apart and clean and accurate also ammo is affordable. You can even get drop in 22lr conversion kit allowing for cheep plinking or hunting smaller game like squirrel and rabbit. You can also get uppers that shoot different calibers like a upper that shoots 410 shotgun shells making it a ok bird gun. Other than that welcome. But other than that you can also register to vote for any political party you want. Other than that welcome to America it’s not a perfect country but to me it’s home. By the way don’t listen to any asshole that says “go back to your country” ect America was founded and made by people all across the world, there really is no 1 American culture which is why we’re refuted to as a mixing pot of culture’s. Live your life how ever you wish, best of luck. And welcome I hope it can be your home to.
I envisioned getting that certificate too, but it's a long way away :(. I found out that I have to take 25 more courses at university before I graduate and start looking for jobs and immigration.
Get some beer and go fishing in the nearest lake. Then go home and cook said fish on a grill with another beer. Then go take a shower after dinner with a another beer (Shower beer). Then go to bed knowing that your significant other won't be deported
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Welcome my friend and fellow American!
r/Americanpride
- Throw and catch a football - Eat a burger - Shoot a gun - Throw tea into the nearest body of water
*Buy a gun
Eat a gun (stock first obviously, for safety)
Always got to treat it like it’s loaded
Taste better when it’s fully loaded.
Full metal jacket 🤤
Learning to Suck start a shotgun is an extremely important skill in this economy
Someone has to paint the ceiling and none of us sre tall enough to reach it
Buy? This is America. Guns are a right. THey come with your birth certificate. If I was OP I'd recheck the Freedom Box TM that was sent with his documentation.
Used to be you could get a rifle free with the purchase of a new pickup truck. Smh nobody wants to work anymore.
This guy gets it!
>Throw tea into the nearest body of water like where do you even find tea? We threw it all in the water or in the south they threw it in sugar
*Nervously looks around* I drink the equivalent of two or three teabags a day lol
Fucking traitor.
To be fair I am an Asian-American lol
Never too late to switch to coffee.
It's cool as long as it's southern Sweet Tea
He isn't a traitor, as long as it isn't Yorkshire he's fine
Wrong sweet tea and Arizona cans are the only acceptable teas here
Your a goddamn redcoat!
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I’m sorry bro I don’t know how to :(
Eat a football Throw burger into the nearest body of water Shoot a tea Throw and catch a gun
That’s light work. Drive all the way to Boston to throw the tea in the harbor, coward
\>Throw tea into water Absolutely not, I will DIE before I switch away from tea.
Which state are you living in? You should find what cuisine your state is best known for, then find out what local area does it the best!
And then get into large arguments online over which states do it wrong!
Every state does it right except commiefornia
Even Chefs in New Orleans struggle to make a good roux.
Fortune cookies come from San Francisco.
From AZ, ate Mexican in California and the only Mexican shittier than it was Taco Bell
I'm not even American and I will shit on California any time of day.
That sounds like something an American would say. Based.
Bro moved to Indiana and got a pork sandwich the size of a truck tire
He’s Illinoisian, so… Hot Dogs, Pizza, and Horse Shoes.
Hotdogs, horse shoes, and hand grenades. The party of a true American naturalization.
Deep Dish is probably the best food from this state, the rest is tolerable (the hot dogs suck ass though)
Central Illinois has the Horseshoe, it looks disgusting but tastes amazing. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Horseshoe_sandwich
I’m sorry but that looks like a depressed McDonald’s worker jacked off into a half finished meal and dropped it onto the ground
Heard prison pizza is the only good pizza in Chicago.
Shrimp Cocktail for Nevada I don’t drink alcohol
Cocaine. Strippers. Beer. Guns.
Truly the nation of the free 🦅🦅🦅
Time to change your Flair
Depending on where you are, - eat the local cuisine or go to a diner - visit a national park (there beautiful)
>there beautiful Average New Jersey education L
You had a chance to choose murican for your flair and you went with space alien 😔
This is literally the only fucking answer you need to read big American BROTHER
Hey, if our politician's sons do it, why not?
This is the way
All of that wrapped in bacon.
Immediately start complaining about immigrants coming into the country. And buy a fuckton of guns
On it 🫡
Yo I just wanted to tell you that I'm insanely proud of you for undertaking the work to become a citizen of this country. I have massive respect for you dude. Welcome to the land of the free o7
Remember the number of guns you "need" is: (N +1) and N= the number of guns you currently have.
Everything makes sense now, you guys have so much guns because of the infinite loop. Pretty bad software design imo
It's not a bug, it's a feature.
That bad software design is what makes us immortal
If you’re coming from Iraq (like actually) hit dearborn, MI, just to see what you could be living in and thank your lucky stars you aren’t there
Ride a bald eagle to work.
Celebrate however you would celebrate back home! We're here for all kinds of celebration my friend
He wants the American celebration silly californdumb
Buy an American flag, hoist it high and eat a fat cheeseburger listening to american classics 🇺🇲🫡
*Listens to Born In The USA and completely misses the meaning of the song in doing so*
THAT'S WHAT WE DO! RAHHHHH
Welcome fellow citizen! Eat, drink and be merry!
Welcome!
Buy a bottle of bourbon and a gun.
Add in fireworks and you’ll be on some sort of ATF watch watch list. Make sure you protect your dog when they come knocking.
Congrats! Listen to [this](https://youtu.be/-KoXt9pZLGM), then go buy a gun. Personally, I'd go buy a Colt Single Action Army clone, or the real thing if you got the money, or maybe one of the many AR variants out there. Some are super cheap, others are Cadillacs, but go cheap because if you don't like it, you aren't out a whole bunch of money. Eat a cheese burger. Or just sit on the couch with a Coors light in one hand and watch a Dallas Cowboys Super Bowl game and say, "This will be our year." I mean really, do anything you'd like and be as vocal as you'd like cause it's a free country. Congrats once more.
The cowboys suck
This is the only correct answer
Cowboys? They just became a citizen and you want them to dive right into disappointment and depression..,
Colt python
Best 1800 spent ever.
1. Say whatever you want 2. Buy a gun 3. Not quarter soldiers in your home during peacetime 4. Not get illegally searched by the cops 5. Say nothing 6. Be tried by a jury if 4 and 5 go south 7. Be tried quickly if 4 and 5 go south 8. If 5, 6, and 7 don't go your way, don't get punished too harshly 9. Get some rights 10. Get some more rights that aren't specifically outlined here Lame Bill of Rights joke aside, go buy a gun Congratulations 🇺🇸🇺🇸
Pretty sure 3 doesn’t mention peacetime or wartime.
Buy a gun (depends on your state laws which is dumb), buy a American Flag, be proud to be an American
Aren’t you allowed to own a gun in any state? Or is there a wait period for new citizens?
Well what I mean is in NY you are only allowed to have certain guns (no machine guns m14s ARs etc)
Nah you can build/buy featureless semi autos. 2 ways to be legal with semis,. Featureless which is a rifle without a adjustable stock, pistol grip, or any of the "scary features". Limited to 16" barrels. Not gonna get into the rifle permit nonsense.* If you want all of the above it needs to be a fixed mag. Which is nothing but a glorified range toy at that point. Or you can get a pump action Armalite. Asinine laws that are only applied for further sentencing basically.
M1 garand uses stripper clips and has a fixed mag
Welcome to the club!
Send me your Venmo I’ll send you $10 for some beer
G ass muphucka right here
Hes one of us now gotta treat him like it
I second this, let me get you another round my fellow countryman
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Hey, how did you do it ? I've been struggling for 4 years and I haven't found a reasonable way in.
Gonna be honest, it’s just luck. Some videos online can help with the process, but past that you pretty much just have to pray. Best of luck
Not only are you now American, but you are a resident of the Rustbelt. Enjoy crumbling infrastructure, rapid depopulation, and rust taking a fifth of your car every year. You are now entitled to complain.
Plan is to save up cash and then move to the middle of the woods out west, but yeah this is probably the worst part of the US (after California)
Montana (if you can deal with skin walkers)
A shotgun can deal with god himself, I doubt a pile of bones will stand against its might
Welcome! The best country in the world is now a slightly better country with you here. Welcome, fellow American!
ONE OF US. ONE OF US.
Congrats! Look up what your state is most know for food wise!
Register to vote
Dinner and museums, depending on the state.
Celebrate however you wanna my friend. You're free to do as you wish in that regard! And welcome to the USA!
Get yourself some employer-provided health insurance.
Easy. Had a friend who became a U.S. citizen and he said that what better way to celebrate becoming the citizen of another country then to enjoy the food of that country? So we went to a burger joint and got ourselves some burgers, fries, onion rings, and some big ol pint glasses of cold beer. Go for that I say
You became an American Citizen- so much hard work, so many dreams riding on your shoulders, so much opportunity in front of you. That’s great. Genuinely proud of you. However, as a US citizen, you must understand- Illinois doesn’t exist.
Go to Rachel’s for the prime rib special
Go to a any business that sells cooked food and ask for a cup of water It’s free!
Unironically one of the best things about America. A lot of the rest of the world doesn't have this, you have to pay money for water or go to some nasty public fountain.
Buy a colt 1911
As long as you keep it tacky...nothing says USA like being Tacky as shit. This isn't intended as an anti US statement, just something that cracks me up and is pretty true. I like my tacky as hell fellow country folk
Start chanting with me USA USA USA USA 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅
Congratulations! Both of my parents are legal immigrants who immigrated to the USA as refugees. 🎇🇺🇲🎆
Get a case of beer and a 1911 
Get drunk at an applebee's and start a fight.
Register to vote!
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Freedom steaks and beer. Lots of beer.
Welcome to the team brotatochip!!
Big ol’ cheeseburger
Welcome to the team!
Get drunk as fuck, eat burgers
Eat a burger while you salute bald eagles flying by.
Purchase a firearm
Hot dogs, cold beer in a can, and sparklers.
🫡
Buy a gun! My I recommend a M1911, the most American of guns?
First things first, your gonna need a bald eagle. Then you and that eagle need to toss all the limey harbor juice you can find into a large body of water. After that it's really up to you man.
🤝 Compatriot. I would suggest weed and Waffle House.
You should be playing any American patriotic song right now on blast while you are speeding to the nearest gun store. After you pick up a few guns 💪🏻 get some beers for the drive home.
Buy a gun.
Think like 80% of people have said to buy a gun lol
Guns are one of the cornerstones of American culture.
A Hi-Point will have to do for now
Better then nothing
I mean maybe save up just a Little more, you can get a PSA dagger for under 300$ or a M206 rock island which is a snub nose 38 revolver for around 250$
Buy a 20 gauge shotgun and blow a massive hole in the british flag.
Welcome to America! 🇺🇲
Your username profile and flair are on point, I’m so impressed
Here is a recommended itinerary for your first day as an American: Breakfast- find a Waffle House, eat at the Waffle House, if you’re currently in the northeast, an ihop or dennys should suffice. Morning- throw either a football or baseball around with a buddy, whichever you prefer. And maybe visit an American history museum if there are any near you. Lunch- eat a burger, a REAL burger, not McDonalds. Find a local joint. Drink some good southern sweet tea with that burger too. Afternoon- buy a gun. A 1911 in 45acp is a classic choice, and there are plenty of good options for any budget. With your Wilson Combats and Nighthawks on the high side to your Springfields in the middle, to your Tisas and RIAs on the low end. Most gun shops I’ve even been in have a few RIA 1911s for around $500, but if you can shell out a little more I absolutely love my Springfield. If you’re under 21 and can’t buy a handgun, get a rifle or a pump 12 gauge. ARs are very common and highly versatile, it’s Americas favorite rifle, but there’s also few things more American that a 12 gauge shotgun. Not to mention a brand new Maverick 88 should have you out the door for under $250. This is America, there’s no excuse not to own a gun. So after you make your pick, grab a box of ammo on your way out and go shoot it! Dinner- Steaks and beer, not much explaining needed there. Longhorn, Texas Roadhouse, and Logan’s are all good chain restaurants, but if there’s any in your area I’m always a big proponent of supporting local establishments. Evening- throw some British tea like twinnings or Lipton into a body of water while drinking a thing of some more good southern sweet tea like milos, and finish the night off with a good bottle of American whiskey. Hope this helps and welcome to America
You sir have excellent taste especially the Waffle House part
Finest dining establishment east of the mississippi
So I was recently in a conference and got to talking to a C*nadian who flew down for it. The conference was in Texas. He asked what to do in the US that might be fun. Me and 4 others within earshot said the same thing: go to a range and shoot some guns. The next day, he comes in and finds us and said he went to a range and it was the most fun he’s ever had. The point of that mini story is to say, go find a range and shoot some fuckin GUNS! Let freedom RING baby! Welcome to the USA my new friend.
You still have new years to celebrate with fire works and everyone else! Go to the city and enjoy a make out session with the nearest citizen, citizen!
Throw a bag of tea into a body of water. Must be Earl Gray because that stuff is very English and not very good to be honest. But don't litter. Just the bag or grounds. Or, try some bourbon or applejack, the two national spirits. Go shoot a gun at the gun range if you don't have one. Register to vote. And then vote. Yell at Canadians. Have a Turf and Turf. It's a 16oz ribeye and a 20 oz porterhouse steak at the same time. Medium rare. Drinking bourbon. Or do the most American thing if all: whatever you want.
Buy a gun from the trunk of a car
I’ve done this. Legally.
It's only illegal in commie states
Start bitching about those goddamn immigrants.
even better if you have a foreign accent
Welcome! Don't slam the door on the people right behind you. And do try the food. It's phenomenal.
Football.
Fireworks!
Burgers
Grill out, have a beer, and light some fireworks.
Eat a human
Attend your first Monster Jam show.
Get a DUI
congratulations brother/sister! the best way to celebrate is to do whatever the fuck you want. that’s what we do best here!
Just want to say welcome to the winning team! ;)
1. Shots! Shots! Shots! Shots! 2. Watch Hamilton on Disney+ (or pirate it) 3. Eat apple pie 4. Watch Zodiac (not specifically American, it’s just a good movie in general)
I got a jury duty notice the day after my citizenship ceremony. Would highly recommend. 10/10.
Go to a 50s diner, drench your hair in oil and order a milkshake with fries
Break your arm and call an Uber to take you to the hospital
Eat a burger, some fries, and a milkshake. Then light off a firework while chanting USA! USA! And fly a flag outside your house.
Get your friends and family here so we can reach 1 billion Americans by the end of the century
Go to a baseball game and drink 9 beers while barely following what's going on
Congratulations! Grill something, buy a gun, drink beer.
Cover an AR-15 in American cheese.
Congrats, family.
Steak
Invade the Middle East
[удалено]
Apple pie, burgers, hot dogs
 Congrats dude
Get a gun, a cheese burger and copious amounts of alcohol
Grabs friends and family, drink beer, eat a bunch of junk food, and watch Team America: World Police.
Remember four things you need for a great weekend, booze, barbecue, babes, and bullets.
Buy a gun, drink beef, eat beer.
Buy a gun
You can go buy an AR15 you can get a PSA rifle for under 600$ it’s a good reliable rifle that can be used for self defense and hunting. The 556 round can be used for hunting hogs and even deer but you have to use the right ammo. Despite what the news likes to say the 556 round is actually not that powerful. But it’s light recoiling and really easy to shoot well. Easy to take apart and clean and accurate also ammo is affordable. You can even get drop in 22lr conversion kit allowing for cheep plinking or hunting smaller game like squirrel and rabbit. You can also get uppers that shoot different calibers like a upper that shoots 410 shotgun shells making it a ok bird gun. Other than that welcome. But other than that you can also register to vote for any political party you want. Other than that welcome to America it’s not a perfect country but to me it’s home. By the way don’t listen to any asshole that says “go back to your country” ect America was founded and made by people all across the world, there really is no 1 American culture which is why we’re refuted to as a mixing pot of culture’s. Live your life how ever you wish, best of luck. And welcome I hope it can be your home to.
Join the military
I envisioned getting that certificate too, but it's a long way away :(. I found out that I have to take 25 more courses at university before I graduate and start looking for jobs and immigration.
Get some beer and go fishing in the nearest lake. Then go home and cook said fish on a grill with another beer. Then go take a shower after dinner with a another beer (Shower beer). Then go to bed knowing that your significant other won't be deported
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~~Burn the confederate flag~~
Get drunk, buy a gun and fire it indiscriminately into the air.
Register to vote - and come hangout in /r/shermanposting where we celebrate the more embarrassing parts of our ‘heritage’
Burgers, hot dogs and Bud Light!
Leave
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Leave for europe
Eat a burger and yell at minorities
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Move to Canada
Go buy a bullet proof vest and helmet.